To sack the cleaner?

Yes not worth the stress. Only you there now so not much mess, ask around your area, look on Streetlife, try to get a cleaner who comes recommended by a neighbour or friend.

She is not for you, and you are not for her.

You stopped her coming during the summer as DS was making a mess and it was pointless cleaning. It was not pointless cleaning all summer as the dirt and grime must have been building up and what a big cleaning job she had no wonder it took her 2 hours. Maybe that was why she took the before and after pictures and told you to keep it clean.

You also seem to have made it more difficult to clean by having double things around filling up spaces and it sounds like she was trying to clear areas so she could clean. Before my cleaning lady comes I tidy and put things away so she can clean properly not have to move things to clean as it takes longer.

When you cancelled her over the summer did you consider her loss of wages she needed to live not easy to find short term jobs. Think how you would manage If your pension was stopped for a few weeks. I think this comes under nil hour contracts. She most likely insisted on staying the 2 hours in case you complained that she left early.

I think a company like Mollymaid would be better as they have other work for their employees when needed.

Sorry others if I sound harsh but employing someone works both ways.

I moved house once to leave the cleaner behind, she was like a demonic robot just did her stuff relentlessly and only what she wanted to do.

I am scared to get one now and really could use some help. It is just the thought of being tidied up that I hate, I need a cleaner to wash windows and clean skirtings not someone who puts all my paperwork in tidy stacks.

Wave goodbye and find a proper cleaner. Am sure your friends can help with the name of a reputable cleaner. ?

Thank you ladies for your words of wisdom once again. I drafted a text in the early hours, just to make me feel better, so I will look again at that and send that.

She took one photo yesterday of the kitchen, I don't know what to do about that? I wouldn't have minded if she had asked for like a business profile, but she has established clients so why she did it I have no idea.

No, she is not SS, or agency, she is private. I told her over the summer that I wanted to leave it until DS had left for uni as it would make it easier cleaning without him here and his mess of course. His room still needs doing.

It's the floors I struggle with. I can tidy, at my own pace, but the floors are hard work. She told me that we were doing the living room next week! That would mean that all the paperwork I want to sort out would have to be done these next few days. I have stuff to get rid of now that he is in higher education, finance stuff and I like to burn paperwork in my incinerator, so to do it all in a few days is far too much. I never know from one day to the next how I am going to be and I would not be getting much rest if I listened to her and followed what she wanted to do. Even my mother didn't tell me like this!

Also, I need to be getting out a bit too. I have been in a few days now and it starts to tell on me that I have to be out for a bit or I could start to go downhill and that is the last thing I want. So I have to factor that into my time too. And to get my very patient doggie out on my hot rod of a mobility scooter. Today, hopefully, we are off to the library. No dogs allowed apparently, but hey ho, I'm only dropping off, not browsing so they will have to lump it that she is with me. She needs some fresh air, poor love.

As much as I love my home, there is a balance to giving time up to dedicate to it, I think. Not every day can be given up to clean. I used to have a poem when my ED was a baby:-

Cleaning and scrubbing can wait til tomorrow,
For babies grow up, we learn to our sorrow,
So quieten down cobwebs and dust go to sleep,
I'm rocking my baby, and babies don't keep.

X

Complain to her boss telling them everything you told us.

You are paying her. It is for you to say what she does, when she does it (at least until you both get into a routine you are happy with). And why would you employ a cleaner if your house DIDN'T get into a mess?! I too would find it difficult to actually sack her, but i agree with those who suggest that you fib a little and say you think you will be doing it yourself again, then look elsewhere for someone who suits you better. Or if you feel up to it you could simply say that the arrangement isn't working for you, you will give her a reference, but you need to let her go. If at that point she argues, allow yourself to get angry, give her chapter and verse on her shortcomings, and escort her out of the front door, locking it loudly and firmly behind her!!!

I think she needs to go sounds like one of those people who looks busy doing nothing, find someone who is not going to demean you in your own home.

My DS has done some cleaning in the rest of the house over the summer for me, hoovering and the suchlike, I don't want you all thinking I am now living in a total mess.

I just have an idea of how I want to do things, in which order. I use these cleaning wipes and they are a lot easier so the bathroom got the done when he had left, new stuff in place and it looks lovely now.

I do wonder, if she was a bit jealous yesterday, seeing me now living on my own (she has teenagers still at home making mess, as they do) and my new things in place and it coming together nicely. But I have worked hard for it all and I thought she would be pleased for me, not jealous, but it didn't seem so somehow. Anyway, time to send the text. I'll let you know if I get something back. Thanks again. X

Get rid of her now! My cleaner comes for two hours and in that time does the ironing (when there is some), makes the beds, dusts, mops and hoovers everywhere (including my bed and the sofa, to get the cat hairs off), cleans the hob in the kitchen, polishes the silver...
I'm only in a 2-up-2-down, but she does the lot every week - I love her to bits!

I would not give her a reference, it is not normal to be taking photos of your kitchen or wherever. If you cannot face telling her the truth, just say that her services are no longer required and thanks.

If she has a key, make sure she has to use it when she comes next time and have someone there with you when you ask for it back. That's the only issue I had when I changed my cleaner. She said she had forgotten the key that day, until I said I'd send my husband round to collect it from her house. It would have been easier if I had had some back up.

I would terminate her employment and get a new cleaner.

Ruby...you don't need this lady in your life right now (or ever) you know as others I was on the road to develop my own cleaning business, but didn't succeed.I have cleaned in the past and no way would I speak or behave in the way that this cleaning person is behaving towards you.Your cleaner needs to be your friend, not your enemy like this person sounds.Sounds very rude and not very confidential taking photos of your home (what if she is showing the photos to others) it's really not on, she sounds very rude and certainly doesn't/wouldn't fit my criteria if a cleaner, as other have said, find your self another cleaner! not easy I know but it sounds like she makes you agitated when she is there.

Your cleaner shouldn't be telling you anything! The relationship obviously isn't working and you need to say goodbye to her. Before that, demand that she properly removes from her phone the photos she took of your house.

I have a really nice cleaner but I hate being around when she is here, I try and find a mission away from home to fulfill on the afternoon she is in the house. She prefers it that way too I am sure. However, to be the devil's advocate in this affair, I am puzzled as to how you could expect your cleaner to turn up on demand as and when it suits you, you stopped employing her all summer then required her to start working for you again at the drop of a hat. Maybe she feels a bit used?

I agree with Poll. If, for whatever reason, I don't need my cleaner to come, I always pay her - I don't want the responsibility or guilt of reducing her already meagre income. If you didn't need or pay your cleaner for several weeks at a time, how could you square this with your conscience? And - I've had teenage sons - they create untidyness but not dirt; unless your son is a filthy slob, surely she could still have come in to clean around his chaos?
We have only heard one side of the story here - I wonder how your cleaner would explain things?

She sounds far too pushy and it's a terrible clash of personalities.
I clean and it takes me 2 hours to do a 2 bed house very thoroughly. Just send her a text and find someone you get on better with. Can you go out in future and leave a list of jobs that the cleaner can get on with until you get home?
Don't feel guilty as it's a business arrangement and sometimes they have to come to an end. As she's pushy and a bit too involved in your life by the sound of it, she might make comments but just imagine the relief of not having to put up with her again!

I go out when my cleaner comes cos I'm not comfy being an " employer". But I got an agency as I know they are vetted as far as trustworthiness. Or best of all is word of mouth.
Don't keep this one! Have a short statement in your mind and tell her either at the end of the next time she comes, or by phone or letter. Keep it short. Eg this well be your last day. I don't need you any more. Don't go into it any further as it will stress you out.

If it's a private arrangement then just tell/text her to say that you no longer require a cleaner. No need to feel guilty: I'm assuming it's cash in hand and it's unlikely that she has declared herself to HMRC as a self employed person!
If you get someone new, start by giving them a list of what you require doing and ensure that those things are done: you are the one paying for the service.

I agree with the others. This is not the right person. You need someone who will support you and not cause you stress. It sounds as if she is playing power games and it will only get worse if you keep her on.

It would be best to be truthful from the start - or at least if you're going to use a little white lie to soften the blow don't tell her you're going to do the cleaning yourself because she will find out when you get a replacement! She sounds a bit odd to me so best be firm from the start, you don't want to say something that'll go legs later on!

Your house, your rules, your money. She's been disrespectful and doesn't deserve the patience you've shown so far.

I too agree she does not seem like the right person for you. I would have sent her packing if she wasn't doing the cleaning I required. As for putting out your new things - if you said you wanted to do it yourself that should have been the end of it.

I have difficulty bending to clean skirting boards etc but am quite capable of unpacking a microwave myself - I have done!!!!

Email is best option to avoid confrontation but don't let her drag you into a row my email. Good luck finding a new cleaner - hope you get a good one

My cleaner used to
Clean kitchen cupboard doors , kitchen surfaces and hob (not the oven),windowsills (our kitchen goes into our conservatory)Sweep and mop floor
Clean bathroom ,sink in our bedroom(not shower) ,toilet (own sink) downstairs cloakroom
-in two hours
She then did about one- two hours ironing (two DC s at home ,husbands shirts my smarter work clothes)
I had said at the start I wasn't bothered about hoovering or dusting-DH did both- but she always used to do it (four bed , stairs and landing and ground floor)I think she liked leaving the house looking nice .
If we were away she would do extras like skirting boards and inside windows the second week .
I find the idea of someone else stripping beds bizarre (kids were trained to do their own) Re-making would be ok .I had once left a pile of clean bedding on our bed as had stripped it before going on holiday and she did make it up,bless her
I was out at work most times she came but we were on good terms.DH was working from home when she started .I paid her for four hours so it was up to her how long she took
Worked for me for 11years
Always tidied up before she came and made DC s do same .It was very good discipline !I would never leave paperwork visible to a cleaner either
I think you are being ripped off .
Be very specific about what you want done and ask how long they they think it should take

Sounds like a control freak to me ! Taking photographs is not normal cleaner behaviour. You do not need any excuses to fire her. If you don't want to face to face her, text her and tell her that her services are no longer required and you have made alternative arrangements. Get rid !!