AIBU to want to tell a mum to stop it!

Nana and Grampy. This woman sounds a very bitter character and appears to have issues in her life as this is not what I would consider normal and how you speak to a five year old.I feel sorry for her own children as this can be far from a happy home they are being brought up in.If you are present the next time this woman makes her nasty comments concerning DGS I would politely say 'Do you have a problem with what my DGS is saying/doing?'. It will not solve your problem but you may be sure, if it's of any consolation, she is like it with every one .Other than that next time make a hasty retreat moment DGS comes out of school saying we have to hurry tell me all about it on the way home.
The less time you are in this woman's company the better.

You can protect your own GS, but what about her child/ren? They need protecting too. A word with teacher is called for.

Glad your DD has made the woman aware, NandG.
I hope the two boys can still be friends and the nasty remarks from the mum will stop.

Well done to your daughter, N&G. She did exactly the right thing. I hope she has given the other mum pause for thought

Does the other mum have a child around the same age? It could be that her child experiences your grandson as a bit of a showoff and feels put down. I mean the two examples you gave were one of having a load of goood work stickers and the other example was saying he knows everything about something - which the other mum is right he doesn't. Normally I wouldn't expect that response from a responsible adult, but we don't know how much her child is hurt by it, and maybe she thinks your daughter should be talking to him about not boasting too much in front of other kids.

There are some really nasty people out there - it beggars belief! There are so many cutting remarks I can think of to put this dreadful woman in her place - who on earth would put down a child in front of his peers and other parents and make him CRY?? Good grief, your DD needs to drop this woman and befriend other mums. Feel very sorry for this woman's children. And yes, as a grandparent, I would definitely say something rather than back over her in my car............have a good sports day!

I am very glad your daughter spoke to this woman, she is a bully. I feel like the previous poster who says your daughter should steer clear. It is a shame for the children but the other Mother sounds negative and spiteful.

is this other mother mentally ill? What other reason could she possibly have for arguing with a little boy and making him cry, bless him. If I were your daughter I would give this woman a wide berth, she sounds horrible.

Chastising a little boy for doing something positive (and bringing him to tears) is both cruel and unwarranted. It is absolutely NOT acceptable because a child's self esteem is a fragile thing and the damage can be irreversible.

By watching it happen without saying anything, your daughter is inadvertently enabling the verbal abuse of her own child. If she can't protect him, then who will? Most bullies are cowards which is why they prey on the small and the weak. Your daughter needs to stand up to this mean spirited woman ASAP and with no apologies!

Oops I guess I didn't see the update. Glad that it was resolved without further issue.

May I add that in the (refreshing) old days, it would have been Politically Correct to say something like..."Make my grandson cry again and the neighborhood 'NanaPatrol' will dispatch one of its biggest and strongest to slap you around a bit and make YOU cry!"

I agree with Elegran. This lady has a problem. What's wrong with saying, "Well done, lad," or whatever? Perhaps she's jealous because her kids aren't so smart.
Your DD should give her the cold shoulder. To Mrs Meanie I'd feel like saying, "Well, hard cheese," (or something ruder) and wander off. Perhaps just warn DGS not to tell her about his achievements until out of earshot of Mrs Jealous.

It is your daughter who needs to deal with this. Other Mum could get really nasty about you with yr daughter when you are not there. Keep out of it, it's yr daughter's problem and she should deal with it in her own way. She probably has years of sharing a playground with the other Mum ahead of her.

Some folk have no idea around children at best and at worst enjoy the power they have, and she sounds like one of those.
She'd get a death stare and if she continued I'd have to say something.If I didn't I'd end up saying way too much!
Sadly I met a few in the school playground when my dd was small.I avoided them like the plague and isolated myself.their kids would come and chat to me as they often came over to play.Their mums thought I was stand offish and I was!
I refused to take part in their competitions either about the kids or themselves.

I do think the 'Discussions of the Day' comment by GN seems a bit weird... ( I might need a slap ) Really?

Yes, it is weird Anna. The OP is Aibu to want to tell a mum to stop it - that is, to tell the mother of one of her 5 year old grandsons friends to stop being unkind to grandson.

I agree with others who have said this: The woman is a bully and should be avoided. I know this may be difficult at the school gates, but your daughter doesn't have to engage with her quite so much. At the end of the day she has to make a choice - hurting this woman's feelings or allowing her to bully the children and make them upset. There comes a point when teasing crosses the line into bullying - I know this from experience when my husband (braver than me) told a family member to leave the house because they were upsetting the children.

I appreciate your comments Inge , the other mums child was not within hearing distance so I don't think my GS caused any issue there.

He wasn't boasting about his stickers, they were on his shirt for anyone to see. All the children get them for various things .

It's hard to explain about the car thing but this little boy lives and breathes cars..always has. He retains pretty much everything he's told, sees or reads so in the big picture of things he knows more about cars than most people.

I still don't see why it's necessary to reduce a child to tears by persistent argument . Or why it matters enough to do so to this woman.

Anyway, for now it's resolved.

I would definitely let the teacher know what's going on so that she can look out for the bully's children too!
For evil to flourish all it takes is for good men/women to do nothing!

I feel that deliberately destroying a child's confidence is a form of child abuse and I would say that quietly to the other mother.

The adult is abusing the power she has simply by being an adult. It is wrong, wrong, wrong.

Step away, well away. School gates are notorious for seething , red hot boiling frustrations, resentments and jealousies. Your daughter needs to avoid this woman as will all eventually escalate. Can you not stand in yard but just go at last minute. Do not interact but smile and take boy from her craven orbit. All of you keep well away. Mpre going on in her life than apparent. ANyone who makes a child cry is to be seriously avoided.

No absolutely the other mum handled it wrong, she needs to learn better diplomacy and kindness.

Yup, as many others have said - AVOID.
Gosh brings back irritating school gate memories! If I could tell my younger self now it would be not to waste another moment engaging with this wretched woman. She will not be reasoned with and will relish any discussion as an opportunity to beat her own drum a bit more. Astonishingly there seem to be LOADS of people out there that really thrive on contention and strife!!! So dont waste your breath trying to be reasonable, follow you gut instinct and keep away.

You taught your lioness daughter well. She had good sense to tell the bully to be kind. Hope it works.