.. to feel uncomfortable bout this book loan ..

It's not really sex per se, it's the intimate nature of the descriptions, but thanks for everyone's comments, you helpful GNers!

I don't see a problem if she s 24 and it's well written. I read loads of different genres.

Please trust yourself, I find life better if I follow my instincts.

The reviews place the book on my list to purchase. But I doubt I will share with my daughters or their husbands.

I can't see anything wrong with this as she is 24. If she was 14 it would be a different matter. She is an adult.

This scenario would make me feel v uncomfortable. It's not a matter of if/what - you DO feel uncomfortable, so pretend either a) it's not from him but say steamy when you give it to her or b) just don't give it. Tell OH what you have done in either case and explain why.

Why not thank him for the good read and mention your concern to him that this may be too explicit coming from him to her at her age and that you were wondering if the whole idea of him lending her this book may be misinterpreted? You may encourage him to propose lending her another book. Even if he didn't mean to be explicit this time, he would be aware that this makes you uncomfortable and would think twice about lendibg her such explicit material next time around...

I suppose it is similar to say an older man you know say through U3A who you are friendly with from say a walking group lending you a novel with sex scenes in. I think if that happened to me as a married woman I would feel a tad uncomfortable about it.

Just looking for something to read. The reviews look excellent, have bought it for my Kindle. Perhaps one for the book club?

But she's known him and been his partner for 24 ish years as Devongirl says he's been around the granddaughter since she was a toddler mumofmadboys he's not just a random 66 year old giving her a book

He was happy to talk to you about it & to lend it you to read, so can't see anything untoward, especially ,if ,has been suggested, you warn her it is a bit 'explicit'?.Im sure she will say 'no thanks 'if she thinks it isn't be her cup of tea.

I was once asked to read a friend's not yet published novel. It was quite...saucy! To be honest there wasn't much to it aside from the sex. She asked me to give it a critique and I didn't really know what to say.

We have three adult, college educated children who love to read and appreciate good literature. My husband (ditto background) is also an avid reader. He, myself and our children often recommend/share best sellers, mystery novels, thrillers etc. We do not consider ourselves prudes.

So here's one perspective. My husband would not be comfortable lending out a book with sexually 'steamy, explicit' scenes (featured so prominently as to elicit mention), to a daughter/granddaughter, (regardless of age).

Isn't he just treating her as an adult?

Just to clarify.....Being 'on and off' for years doesn't necessarily bestow someone with righteous 'fatherly' instincts.

We knew a couple where the husband (thirty two years her senior) knew the girl since she was four years old and he was still in his first marriage. Follow your gut.....this one doesn't feel right.

Yes, I think you are being a prude!

At 24 she's an adult and has probably read worse. With a Literature degree, she'll read it in a different light than you did! If you feel strongly, mention it gently to her, something like "That first section was a bit steamy!" After all, many young women have read "50 Shades!"

If you don't pass it on, as suggested by a previous contributor, you will open a whole can of worms about censoring your adult daughter's reading material! We all have to realise that our children eventually grow up..........Thankfully!

Only one of the reviews I have read on line makes much of a mention of the sex in the book, and it does seem a little odd that a well-received book by a Booker Prize winner should not be passed on. If I were the OH I would be hurt and annoyed. Suppose he had recommended the Song of Solomon?

Just to reiterate (again) - I don't have a problem with the content of the book; it's the situation.

I enjoyed reading the one * reviews on a well-known online shop beginning with A.
(I always read the worst reviews first for books, hotels, places to visit etc!)

Me too, Jalima. Sometimes they put me off so well, I give up right there.

I expect you'll be able to explain it properly to your OH when you see him in person, devongirl. It doesn't matter what other people think is okay, if you're not happy about it that's your prerogative.
There's no real need for this book to be shared with your DD after all.

This has made mesmile although I can understand the OP's attitude. My late Mum was an avid reader right until she died in her late 90s. She used to pass on some of the books to my DIL. On several occasions DIL has admitted to me that she felt rather embarrassed reading the steamy sections knowing that her husband's grandmother had also read them.

This is hypothetical really. The woman is grown up 24yrold
I think the issue of an older man showing a younger woman a sexy book is one thing.
What you really need to know is have you picked up any inferences or anything else from this bloke that might make you feel he is trying to stage a come on to this woman.

Does he make anyone feel uncomfortable by his body language etc?

Yesterday there was a late middle aged man with some women friends in the pub where we have our knitting group.
I was not sure if he knew someone in our group or not, but he was really getting far too close to some of us for comfort. A real invasion of peoples personal space.

I heard this book reviewed some while ago on the radio and thought at the time it sounded like a bit of a self-indulgent male fantasy, lots of sex between an upper-class man and a beautiful young servant girl (yawn). I haven't read it so might be being unfair. However, I do feel Devongirl's OH has got this a bit wrong (possibly, as a previous poster pointed out, because he doesn't want to appear prudish) and is probably feeling 'cross' because he now realises it.

Not a good idea to invade someone's personal space when they have a knitting needle in their hand Nelliemoser