Gransnet forums

AIBU

Another GNer feels they have to leave

(147 Posts)
BlueBelle Wed 11-Oct-17 06:28:08

Another one of us has felt the need to leave after finding their post had been printed (along with the whole thread) in the Daily Mail that’s is so blooming sad that someone feels so unsafe that they have to disappear
I think this is awful and leaves everyone feeling they are afraid to post anything now, I understand we are told when we join that this is public but how many of us thought public meant ending up in print in a national newspaper
What can we do ? Any ideas ?

Katek Fri 13-Oct-17 22:40:48

That's what I mean about being selective Leticia, if posters feel the need to use personal experiences to help others then posts need to be tweaked to protect identities. Either that or send a pm.

Leticia Sat 14-Oct-17 06:38:33

Also don't have a profile unless you are happy that absolutely anyone can identify you. I have just clicked on 2 and they give their age, where they live and photos of themselves and their grandchildren.
I am sure that some posters do not realise that GN is social media and the only privacy setting is to be very careful about what you make public.

Norah Sat 14-Oct-17 06:56:23

Be careful what is posted. That covers it.

Norah Sat 14-Oct-17 07:00:50

Katek, I'm genuinely puzzled as to why some posters feel the need to leave the forum or are so distressed by threads appearing on other social media platforms. It's already out there on GN so what's the problem with it also appearing on FB, Twitter or the DM?

The answer: just post carefully.

Grannyknot Sat 14-Oct-17 07:46:02

Posting in the Gransnet forum is seductive. Some of the forum headings invite disclosure "Am I being unreasonable?" In "Relationships" - would you write about having had a cup of coffee with a friendly neighbour? smile

It's the equivalent of sticking a microphone in someone's face on the high street and asking "What do you think of So-and-So having had an affair?"

Juicy content sells. Sometimes I think these forums are just another form of tabloid press... <ducks and runs away>.

The bottom line is, don't provide the content ...

annsixty Sat 14-Oct-17 07:52:40

How boring GN is and will continue to be without members posting about their own experiences and those of their families.
Many of us have had very welcome help and much support in very difficult times and troubled relationships. That now for many of us has gone.
I regret this but will be very, very careful now in what I post.

BlueBelle Sat 14-Oct-17 08:22:11

I think it’s the sneakiness (DM) that has surprised me and I know some say you were told when you joined well if I was I didn’t take it in ....again there are fb and Twitter logos around the place and again not being very observant I hadn’t EVEN noticed them, not blaming GN for that, my negligence entirely but I somehow don’t think I m alone

I post from my heart not my head (silly me) if I see a problem that I ve had experience of I want to give my thoughts with the idea that it might help, I believe even sometimes ‘anti’ thoughts can be helpful allowing someone to look at things from a different angle We all have lots of life experiences good and bad I thought that sharing them could only be a good thing
Of course I always knew GN was a public site but being an old ‘granny’ I wouldn’t for a minute expect any of my family to be joining or looking in on a granny site I haven’t posted anything I wouldn’t talk to anyone about in real life but I also would probably have posted a lot less if I thought people in my family were reading ...just in case I looked silly or said anything they wouldn’t have ( thankfully I don’t know any DM readers in the family and don’t expect they d hunt for a fb granny page nor do any do Twitter )

I do think twice now before I post and that’s certainly taken a lot of the spontaneity and joy away for me

Nelliemoser Sat 14-Oct-17 08:52:32

I asked GNHQ a few questions about who owns them etc and have had no reply . Maybe we should individually contact GNHQ to ask whether or not they are affiliated to one or other newspaper. As the press is wont to do. They

Christinefrance Sat 14-Oct-17 08:53:54

I agree BlueBelle certainly for me some of the spontaneity has gone, maybe I was naive in not thinking GN was an open site, it just seemed more of a sharing experience than the usual social media sites.

merlotgran Sat 14-Oct-17 10:08:36

The genie is out of the bottle now. Even knowing that GN was a site that could be viewed by all and sundry, it was the lifting of threads on to facebook that has caused the dismay. Add DM articles into the equation and you've got a situation where usernames are being changed, profiles hidden and spontaneity has gone out the window.

We no longer have webchats with celebrity guests as it seems nobody wants to be associated with us. Who can blame them? Anything they say in response to a light hearted question could be lifted and construed as a 'quote.'

Little by little we've been downgraded to a cyber care home where we are almost afraid to open our mouths. Debates on the political threads, even if they turn nasty, are left unchallenged though because it's important to keep an active mind grin

I don't think there's anything we can do to stop the rot. sad

Leticia Sat 14-Oct-17 13:43:37

I am beginning to think that GNHQ have actually listened! The thread on how retirement affects marriage has been edited before tweeting- no names.
Just need to sort out policy with newspapers now.

Serkeen Sat 14-Oct-17 14:30:10

If they did print the post the postee would have remained private..never the less it is still intrusive and hard to believe they can do this without permission.

As to what can we do I think that is a question we should be asking gransnet customer services

Are you able to say what story it was that they used or post ?

MissAdventure Sat 14-Oct-17 14:33:00

They have permission though, in the sense that it's made clear that the forums are public, and posters choose to post. It is up to us to censor what we say, which of course means that its almost impossible to impart any information without building up a profile which could be recognised.

Leticia Sun 15-Oct-17 22:27:40

I thought it was too good to be true! GN on Twitter was mere coincidence and they are back to copy and pasting threads. I shall have to be aware that anytime I comment on GN I am most likely commenting on Twitter too.

POGS Mon 16-Oct-17 09:32:33

Gransnet is open to and has been used in many ways by various sources .

It is worth remembering it is open to ALL media / social outlets , some still seem to believe it is just Twitter and the Daily Mail.

Leticia Mon 16-Oct-17 09:51:07

It is open to absolutely anyone. I am only highlighting Twitter because I find that most things I say on here on on Twitter about 24hrs later - not edited in any way- just the whole thread linked. You are safe if you play word games or the general chat or a thread like this- it will stay purely on GN.

GillT57 Mon 16-Oct-17 10:32:56

If you go on to MN you will find they talk about the same thing, and often in the middle of a robust or controversial discussion someone will say 'beware, this will likely end up on Daily Mail'. It is notable that it seems to be only the Mail which lifts discussions, twists them to suit their own idea of events, and publishes them,. Yet another reason, if we ever needed one for heaven's sake, to stop encouraging this malicious rag, run by tax dodging millionaires. I hope they copy and print this, by the way!

Welshwife Mon 16-Oct-17 10:45:17

I have written a number of posts only to delete them rather than post after reading through and being worried about the content etc. I cannot be the only one doing that - it does make you very wary and to some extent disrupts what might have been said and could have helped someone

BlueBelle Mon 16-Oct-17 13:45:53

Let’s start a thread on the awfulness of DM and see if the lift that Haha?

Grannyknot Mon 16-Oct-17 15:28:46

Bluebelle it amuses me though that content on these forums is good enough for the (hated) DM - yet the "loftier" newspapers ignore e.g. the intense political discussions! grin grin

maryeliza54 Mon 16-Oct-17 16:38:49

I don’t think anyone believes it’s just Twitter and the DM - we know it’s also FB but no one seems to be able to give a link to another newspaper which has lifted a whole thread