I'm not clear on whether or not dh just doesn't like celebrating or doesn't like to do it with YOUR friends and family.
Either way, I see some obvious compromises. If something is about you/just you, do it your way. Have that 50th birthday party. He doesn't have to be there. Or maybe have a lunch/dinner at a restaurant and let him know he doesn't have to come.
But when it's about him or both of you, then factor in his feelings. Don't have a big 10th anniversary celebration, but make a special dinner or make reservations somewhere just for you two. Or get tickets to a show, etc.
Then there are the larger celebrations, like Christmas, which generally involve family. If he doesn't get you a Christmas present, don't get him one. But please find a way to make time to celebrate with your family, even if it's not on the exact day. Again, he doesn't have to be there. And it doesn't have to be at your house (you may have to let that "pretty table" go or just have it for yourself). But since he enjoys dgs, maybe he will join you.
It's great that he's so good with dgs, especially since he never even wanted kids, etc. He may think this is a big compromise on his part, even though you feel you've made more concessions.
Thanking him for every concession he makes may be annoying. But maybe that's why he does it? Maybe he'd do less if you didn't thank him? I don't see why you have to do it "every 5 minutes" though. One big effusive ty with a big bear hug should be enough,
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