Gransnet forums


AIBU to live in hope that even controversial threads can avoid personal abuse?

(108 Posts)
Iam64 Fri 15-Jun-18 18:51:51

That’s it really. I don’t claim to the moral high ground.
I try to avoid personal abuse but like most posters, I’ve been known to fail.

BlueBelle Sat 16-Jun-18 08:47:31

This is funny no one can even agree about agreeing

I am passionate about some things like B-it so stay well away from those political threads because what’s the point no ones going to change my mind nor I theirs so stay away and stay sane
I try never to get personal I think in the ‘help /relationship’ type threads some people ask for advice then take it as a total rebuff if you come up with something that is not what they are wanting to hear but that’s not being personal or harsh it’s being truthful and having a different take on their problem (which should be useful)

Oldwoman70 Sat 16-Jun-18 08:51:20

True sodapop but then the person withdrawing could be accused of "flouncing". I am all in favour of robust debate but surely this can be done without making personal comments. I have a friend whose views on just about everything are different to mine, we often have discussions about anything and everything, but those discussions never deteriorate to insults. I respect his views and he respects mine (although we neither of us stop hoping we can change the others mind!)

DanniRae Sat 16-Jun-18 08:52:43

Can I just say on this thread I can not understand why, when a thread is trundling along nicely with lots of positive comments about a subject, someone comes on and says "I can't understand why anyone would be in the least bit interested in xxxxxx. It's boring and I have no interest in it at all!" Why read the bl**dy thread then? Why be so rude to the people who are enjoying putting their comments? It just makes me so angry angry
Sorry for rant........breathes deeply...........and I am calm!!

gillybob Sat 16-Jun-18 08:56:35

You make a very good point DanniRae why indeed?

Stay calm and watch football ⚽️

DanniRae Sat 16-Jun-18 09:29:49

Thank you gillybob - good advice and much appreciated! Have a good day! smile

Jalima1108 Sat 16-Jun-18 15:46:27

Stay calm and watch football ⚽️
not if DS was watching too!!

Jalima1108 Sat 16-Jun-18 15:46:47

oh, that looks like a rugby ball now

lemongrove Sat 16-Jun-18 15:53:53

Iam64 ??
Perhaps we should all have a Me Too badge.wink

kittylester Sat 16-Jun-18 17:44:34

Some people seem to set out to be nasty though.

Waterloosunset Sat 16-Jun-18 17:50:42

Yes DanniRae I agree! Never understood the need for it?

varian Sat 16-Jun-18 18:36:15

I try not to be nasty about other GNetters, even the very irritating ones, but I think politicians are fair game. Of course, I'm not talking about death threats and other really awful stuff that many politicians, especially women, have to put up with, but I think it is OK to call them out for such misdemeaners as hyppocracy and being economical with the truth.

Jalima1108 Sat 16-Jun-18 18:39:05

I think they are too - after all we have to hold them to account.

sazz1 Sat 16-Jun-18 20:56:24

I think trolls invade all threads at random. Some people enjoy upsetting others and watching the fallout even on gransnet.

Iam64 Sat 16-Jun-18 21:23:03

Oh dear sazzl, I suspect base control may object to the use of the word t****l smile

DanniRae Sun 17-Jun-18 07:28:54

Thanks Waterloosunset for your post - always good to know that you aren't the only one who feels like this! smile

Azie09 Sun 17-Jun-18 08:32:41

The other threads where things get personal are to do with relationships with adult children, especially where there has been disagreement and/or estrangement. People get highly emotional and often react on the basis of their own particular scenario rather than attending to what the OP has said. Woe betide the poster who tries to give an alternative point of view. There was one such thread only the other day.

Oh yes and let's add in any threads about the Royal Family!

I do enjoy perusing Gransnet but am careful about posting. There are definitely some people who are like bulls at the gate! The art of disagreeing politely certainly is an 'art'!!


Granny23 Sun 17-Jun-18 08:57:10

As far as the Royals, celebrities and Politicians are concerned, I think the old 'Play the ball and not the man/woman' rule should apply.

By all means criticise, policies, protocols, etc. Certainly, feel free to point out the absurdities of our 'Democracy' but keep in mind that some of us Grans, actually know, are friends with, or are related to some of the people subjected to personal attacks.

I am another who grues at the 'lack of education' jibes. Surely, by our age, what we learned at school, Uni, college half a century ago, is only a small part of our total knowledge and understanding?

gillybob Sun 17-Jun-18 09:00:02

Personally I think those that court publicity shouldn’t be surprised when they get it .

Negative as well as positive .

Iam64 Sun 17-Jun-18 09:07:01

That could well apply to all of us gillybob - we're posting on an open forum. We are also aware that it's possible to identify us if anyone truly wanted to.

Back to the RF, they have little ability to avoid publicity. Celebs and so on are 'fair game' I suppose. I don't see that anyone benefits from what sometimes feels like a society in which being rude to others is seen as acceptable.

gillybob Sun 17-Jun-18 09:11:43

It could indeed Iam but I’m talking about the publicity that requires an agent or a press secretary to “keep them up there “ how can someone ( I would have used an example but changed my mind ) arrange to be photographed doing something positive in order to keep them in the public eye then complain when they are talked about in a negative way if they are found to be found out doing something not so positive?

gillybob Sun 17-Jun-18 09:12:06

Hope that made sense ( I’m typing on a phone ) hmm

gillybob Sun 17-Jun-18 09:12:57

Well it didn’t......really ... but hey ho .

maryeliza54 Sun 17-Jun-18 09:13:46

G23 I really don’t think that if we are criticising someone in the public eye we should worry about some GNers knowing, being related to or friends with them. That’s just tough. There’s perks as well - with some well known people I know that there are and I enjoy them and I know if they were the subject of a thread they could be criticised. I’ll suck it up

gillybob Sun 17-Jun-18 09:20:31

Also this would mean we couldn’t ever criticise anyone ever for fear that someone might know them . That’s silly .

I don’t mind being criticised at all infact I’m rather used to it here on GN . wink

maryeliza54 Sun 17-Jun-18 09:30:16

PS if Toby Young’s mum is on here, or CC’s wife I still think they both behave unacceptably in many ways but I expect you love them dearly.