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AIBU? GS in night nappy

(125 Posts)
NannyJan2 Mon 30-Jul-18 23:13:05

My grandson is 5 and stays with me most Friday nights, he still wears a pull up at night as he still wets the bed. I think he’s to old to be in a nappy still at night. My DS insists he wears one as it disrupts his sleep if he wets himself. Shall I just keep putting a pull up on him or should I let him feel what it’s like to wet the bed as I think that’s how he will learn to stay dry?

Gemmag Tue 31-Jul-18 10:46:10

It doesn’t really matter what you think. Please do as you’ve been instructed to do by your son. You must NOT make this an issue but just carry on with the pull up at night and whatever you do you do NOT tell this little boy that he is too old to wear a nappy at night. Some children take longer than others, so what!.

Eglantine21 Tue 31-Jul-18 10:52:55

Well if he goes on sleeping he won’t know what it’s like to wet the bed. He’ll be asleep.
If he wakes up, you’ll get him up and change the bed, so he’s dry and comfortable so he won’t know much about a wet bed.

You would change the bed? Wouldn’t you?!

goldengirl Tue 31-Jul-18 11:00:56

Sorry but I can't believe the attitude towards this little boy by his grandma. As other posters have said boys take longer and it's the parents not the grandparents who decide what's best. Staying with grandparents should be fun and not stressful and taking away a nappy from a child who's used to one especially when he's away from home can cause the child enormous upset even if he appears to go along with it. He's only 5 for heaven's sake

Katek Tue 31-Jul-18 12:21:07

Not your problem/concern OP. Leave it to his parents and just enjoy his visits - he’ll be grown up before you know it.

Cold Tue 31-Jul-18 12:52:54

No, no no! Do not attempt to humiliate your GS by making him lie in a wet bed. This will just cause a huge family rift. I cannot imagine why you thought this would be a good idea!

Just follow the parents' advice - 5 is not especially old many are not reliable at night

glammanana Tue 31-Jul-18 13:24:43

Never go against the wishes of the parents it can cause untold problems for future relations.
Little boys seem to be much later than little girls they seem to need the comfort of a pull up for that much longer.

ContraryMary88 Tue 31-Jul-18 17:16:04

nannyjan you posted earlier on this subject and said that you remember your son being the same. I don’t understand why you keep asking the same question ( and getting the same answers) the little lad is fine, concentrate on something else and be happy that you see him every Friday.
As my Mum used to say “ stop fretting”.

Eilyann70 Tue 31-Jul-18 17:47:07

My DD2 and SiL adopted a little boy at age 4. He had had a traumatic beginning to his little life and one of the results was not being dry at night. As time went on she was concerned that overnighting at Beavers etc would be a problem. But with encouragement from her two sisters (and me!) she carried on and Bingo! All children develop at different rates.

muffinthemoo Tue 31-Jul-18 17:53:46

Everyone (barring kids with medical problems or sometimes with serious trauma) is dry overnight eventually.

Time will solve the problem!

MissAdventure Tue 31-Jul-18 18:29:54

A few glorious years of being reliably dry, then we reach our forties..

sodapop Tue 31-Jul-18 21:43:56

So true MissAdventure you made me smile. I'll make no mention of tena lady ?

agnurse Tue 31-Jul-18 22:51:11


My dad says when you're young it's "Whatever", when you're old it's "Depends"*!

*Depends is a brand name for adult incontinence products.

MissAdventure Tue 31-Jul-18 23:01:58

He was right, I think!

Witzend Wed 01-Aug-18 09:12:26

A dd of ours used to sleep very deeply, and still at 4 or 5 would wet the bed if we didn't lift her before going to bed ourselves. We would sit her on the loo and she would perform automatically without even waking up.

Maybe your GS is similar, OP. I'm sure he will be dry in his own good time, as our dd was when not very much older. In any case, it's down to his parents to decide how to manage it.

jenpax Wed 01-Aug-18 09:23:26

One of my DD still wet the bed sometimes at age 6 she was a very deep sleeper! She is perfectly fine now as an adult!
These things happen at different rates for different children and we found that making no fuss about it was much the best way, it stopped before she turned 7
Please don’t go against the parents! It isn’t your place to decide how to manage this situation and as others have said it may cause a rift!

Eglantine21 Wed 01-Aug-18 09:25:42

Sometimes adults who are deep sleepers wet the bed too.

We do have washing machines........

BearandCardigan Wed 01-Aug-18 09:32:38

One thing I’ve learned since being a grandmother is that it’s not my child. I do what I’m asked to do. You can read lots of threads on here about grandparents not seeing their grandchildren and if you continue with this you could be one of them. It’s actually made me feel quite sad for that boy. Give it a rest. It’s no harm to you or the child but fussing over this could put him back on being dry at night. My daughter was dry at 2 my son at 6. Just let it go.

inishowen Wed 01-Aug-18 09:39:29

My granddaughter has just stopped wearing the nighttime pants. She is 6. She has never experienced the feeling of a wet bed and now she is having to learn at this late age. I remember taking my children out of nappies at night when they were three. I had wet beds on and off until they were five. The fact that nappy manufacturers are making nappies for big children encourages parents to use them far longer than necessary.

I would say to the OP you must do what the parent asks. It's not up to you. don't even comment on it.

henbane Wed 01-Aug-18 09:51:14

Some children never manage to go through the night - I'm 70 and have never managed it! Instead you learn to wake up enough to go to the loo - or sometimes you don't wake up enough and go in a corner of the bedroom...

Until that happens, nappy cuts down on endless washing of bedding, which is a problem if you are working full time with children at school. Go with the flow - as it were...

carolmary Wed 01-Aug-18 10:19:48

You have to go with the parents on this. Why are you wanting to make work for yourself anyway? Changing beds in the middle of the night, washing sheets every day. He will probably soon grow out of the bedwetting, if not and the parents ask for advice, give it, otherwise keep quiet! BTW there are nifty little mats you can buy that you can use in the transition stage which will save on sheet washing.

Cabbie21 Wed 01-Aug-18 10:41:21

My gra ndson still needs a pull-up at night and he is 13. G P is aware, he is also on some sort of meds.
His dad was the same. It is not unusual.
I would not have thanked his grandparents for interfering.

Flowerofthewest Wed 01-Aug-18 10:41:52

My youngest was a bed wetter until 9. Just occasionally. The rule is (according to Bedwetting clinic nurse) 1 in 4 wet four...1 in 5 at five...1 in 6 at six and so on.
Don't make too much of it. My grandchildren. ..3...5...5..7 still wear nite pull ups. My youngest now 33 doesn't. Doesn't wet the bed either

Caro57 Wed 01-Aug-18 10:47:54

Some boys - in particular (sorry to be sexist) take ages to be dry at night. Had an 8year old stay with me years ago and was warned he would probably wet the bed. He did but eventually grew out of it - don't think there were pull ups in those days but it would have been easier and less distressing for all concerned if there had been. Carry on!

mabon1 Wed 01-Aug-18 11:01:05

Don't argue with DS. It's her privilege to bring up her child in her way, not yours.

humptydumpty Wed 01-Aug-18 11:06:21

It would be nice to have a response from the OP to all these comments, which I do agree with.