Men at the sales

Grumpa: You need to be aware that this forum quite often turns into a Loose Women forum, that of let's attack and laugh at men. As for the lady who didn't appreciate being patronised, do you not think that discussing creches for men smacks of patronisation?

Pre-buying lists work well, but not if the family wants to shop (wander about looking at stuff) instead.

Buying and shopping are not the same. One is efficient, the other is not.

I’m a wife!

That’s what lists are for Grampie before setting off!

Oops! I seem to have opened the grumbling floodgates! Grandad1943, as I have already clarified, my question was more aimed at wives than husbands, as, although we haven't had any posting on here yet, it seemed to me yesterday that some were dragging their husbands along against their will. I didn't see any men taking an interested, active role, but I'm sure some do!

Why take your teens?

It goes something like this: “don’t blame me when you don’t have your favourite food/snack/drink for the holidays”.

As I recall.

On a slightly different note. On Christmas Eve hubby and I were shopping in Tesco. One family were trailing five big teenagers behind them. (Not literally) Why oh why did the teens have to go grocery shopping? They were miserable.

Sales are a big no no for me as are shops like TK max. Can’t stand the chaos. I don’t enjoy shopping at the best of times so prefer to do it on my own.

My late DH used to come supermarket shopping with me & he pushed the trolley, he saw that as his role but he did get some input on what went into the trolley, because he was there I could ask him if he wanted to try something different/new. I am & always was capable of shopping on my own, something I've been doing for over 5 years now.

I dislike the sales & rarely go, I would never have "dragged" DH with me. Neither of us were "browsers" even now I know what I want & don't spend hours shopping, the thought of spending a day at Cribbs Causeway (shopping complex near Bristol) fills me with horror but I can wander through my local small Town looking at small independent shops for an hour or three

I'm with you, Urmstongran. I'm not an enthusiastic shopper at the best of times, though I do sometimes have a look on line to see if anything I have coveted has been reduced.

I always preferred shopping alone even when my husband was alive. He was quite happy to provide the funds to being stampeded in busy shops. So long as I brought back his favourite foodstuffs he was happy. He usually got stuck into his DIY on the house.

I think I have a (mostly) male outlook towards shopping. Hate the sales so never go! All that faff for a ‘bargain’ you didn’t know you needed. And I only shop if I need something. I go in, buy it and go home again. I’d hate mooching around - I’d rather stick pins in my eyes.

My DH NEVER comes shopping with me!! He carries the shopping in when I get back from the supermarket but I don't expect him to trail round the shops after me as a bag carrier, I can do that myself! I often see (older) men trailing round after their wives, they always look miserable!

I only have one friend who doesn't 'do' shopping but her DH loves it and had to drag her out to by her mother of the bride outfits when their daughters got married!!

I once had to put out a tannoy message for a lost husband in a Store. He had escaped me back to the car, fed up with my bossing him about what to wear.We now both shop for practically everything on line and rarely shop together. Much, much better,

Us husbands trailing our shopping partners are dutiful beasts of burden.

Sorry for getting in your way of grabbing the next bargain (or putting it back!).

We’d love to give lessons on quickly buying for keeps but most shoppers are not interested.

We went to one sale yesterday, together... While I browsed ladies' "fashion", he went further along to mens'. We met up after about 15-20 minutes, both having chosen a couple of items and proceeded downstairs to see if we could find what we went in for - namely bedding!! Luckily, my DH is quite patient and has a great sense of humour (bit like @Grumpa) so shopping is usually a pleasant experience. He's a wheelchair user, so I normally carry most of the bags - it's a good way of controlling myself, lol!

Always leave my husband in the coffee shop with the newspaper while I go shopping! Much less stressful!

*Grumpa *I liked your post my hubby drives me to shops and carries my bags which I like. I also value his opinion.

I rarely go shopping with DH as he hares around & I can hardly keep up with him let alone look for stuff I want

My (late) husband and I rarely shopped together. We made separate trips to the supermarket (he would buy just what he needed for the next meal that he was cooking; I would buy everything else.) We only went sales-shopping or clothes-shopping together when he needed to be involved in the decision - I would never take him clothes-shopping with me!

The tag-along role of husbands in supermarkets has always annoyed me - so often the man just stands in the aisle with the trolley, looking bored or bewildered and getting in the way. If a woman can't drive, and he has to be there as chauffeur, then I wish he would just stay in the car (or cafe if there is one) and read the paper or something. I am not being anti-male or sexist; if a man does the shopping by himself, that's fine, and many do (and they don't seem to need a spare person to push the trolley). I just don't like the useless man hanging around blocking the aisles while his wife does the actual shopping. "For better, for worse, but not for Sainsburys" was our agreement.

Even worse is the couple in which one party takes the trolley to tbe queue while the other continues to bring items to add to the trolley. No, not fair! The queue is for people who have finished shopping!

But one of the saddest things for me after OH died was arriving home from the supermarket with no one there to greet me at the front door, help me carry in and unpack the shopping, and snuffle around in the bags to see what treats I might have bought. Funny, the things you miss.

Perhaps the women who take their husbands shopping don't drive, or have medical conditions that prevent them from carrying heavy bags. Do I accompany my husband to the DIY store to buy axes and nails? No. Now My fuzzy mind is struggling to nail what point I'm trying to make!

Grumpa loved your post x

Grumpa If I were looking for a replacement for my beloved late husband, I would like one with your sense of humour and common sense, one who treated the world as neither a place to grimly control nor one in which to make people look foolish with "gotchas" but where we all talked, argued a little and smiled without malice at human falliblilty.

Grumppa I saw nothing patronising in your post either. I saw a bit of gentle humour, but that's all. Not did I see any misandry in your response. sigh

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