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A ‘ Three Generation’ holiday

(85 Posts)
Ranworth1 Sat 16-Mar-19 22:12:35

I would like to treat my three DC, their wives/partners and DGC to a family holiday. My younger DS and DD are happy with my suggestion of a cruise which caters for children (with clubs, etc), but the eldest DS and his wife say a cruise is totally unsuitable for their 2 DC who will be aged almost 7 and nearly 4. They would prefer a villa, near a beach and swimming pools. However the ship has 4 pools, and lots of options for entertainment. My partner, and some of my friends, have had very successful cruise holidays with their DCs and DGC. Any comments!?

chattykathy Sun 17-Mar-19 10:41:00

We plan to do the same but we're going to Orlando. Renting a villa with a pool and Disney, Universal attractions to keep everyone happy.

GillT57 Sun 17-Mar-19 10:56:54

If you agree to the villa holiday please make it very clear that it is your holiday too and you will not be cooking, babysitting, tidying up, doing laundry. On a cruise ship all of this is taken care of. Also, you are not confined to the ship or the pools, cruise in the med and you are able to visit a variety of beaches.

breeze Sun 17-Mar-19 11:01:34

Cruises are out for me as DH suffers from awful seasickness. Once talked him into a boat trip off Gozo. Big mistake. I'll never forget the looks on the faces of the German tourists next door eating lunch on their boat while he was chucking up over the side of ours grin Then he was ill for several days. Same thing happened when I talked him into going on Space Mountain at Disney. I really must stop talking him into things.

Not sure I'd want to go on one anyway, however, as although I know it's 'no FT, no comment' as I've never tried one; I just don't fancy being trapped on a boat with a whole bunch of people I might not like. And then there's the germs they always seem to carry. A friend went on the maiden voyage of some big liner I've forgotten the name of and when I asked her if she'd had a nice time she said 'Well, er, yes, but 6 people died'! Nice.

Family meeting to agree what everyone would be happy with is the way to go I should think. What a generous thing to do for them all and I hope you have a great holiday.

breeze Sun 17-Mar-19 11:03:39

You can combine Disney with a Disney cruise. They used to do a two week holiday with a week at the Disney resort and a week on the Disney cruise ship. You could leave the anti cruise ones behind for that week and meet up with them again to fly home.

Anrol Sun 17-Mar-19 11:09:20

We also took our family, of different ages, interests etc. to Centre Parks. It worked wonderfully well but took a bit of planning. Every age was catered for and as we were all in separate houses, cabins etc we could all have our own space. H & I stayed in bigger house with games room, sauna, jacuzzi & the various families came and went as they pleased and could see as much as each other as we liked. We all met each evening and swapped our day stories. Sometimes there’s no pleasing everyone, but we managed it on this occasion.

grannybuy Sun 17-Mar-19 11:41:34

My first thought is that it would be good, something for everyone. My second thought, though, is that you might lose the family 'togetherness' that we hope for, in that it might be harder to come together in such a diverse setting. I haven't been on a cruise, but I have a mental picture of everyone being spread out doing their own thing. When we've rented properties for the extended family, sometimes we did things together, sometimes not, but the best part was that we had our communal meals, and had the living space for family activities - board games etc. We also had an enclosed garden for the children.

inishowen Sun 17-Mar-19 11:50:12

There is plenty for children to do on a cruise. Your family should give it a chance. We were hooked after our first one. This Easter we are also treating our family to a holiday. There will be five adults, and four children. We're going to Lanzarote to a hotel that has kids clubs, and pools with water slides. I can't wait.

Aepgirl Sun 17-Mar-19 11:54:37

A cruise would be my worst nightmare. Who wants to go on those huge floating holiday camps. A beach villa sounds lovely.

ClareAB Sun 17-Mar-19 11:56:16

Some, and I'm one of them, find the thought of a cruise claustrophobic. Not being able to go for a walk, get in a car, explore different places at our pace, being cooped up on a giant floating building with hundreds of people...
We took a villa with a pool within 15 mins walk from the beach/small town in the north of Corfu with our 3 boys and partners a couple of years ago. it was a massive hit as we could all chill out/go out/explore on our own timetable..

sarahellenwhitney Sun 17-Mar-19 12:00:02

trisher With you on this
I am on the side of a parent with small children who do not want to take up an offer of a cruise.
It is my view that until a child is old enough to appreciate what a cruise can offer ie going to bed,waking up to a different country to explore, party nights, entertainment, all the food you can eat so until then a villa, sea and sand, your own swimming pool for a week or two I am sure is ideal rather than the child /children placed in the on board ship nursery, and given the ships idea of child entertainment while mum /dad are elsewhere. We have children so it is up to ourselves to make sure they can enjoy a holiday as much as mum and dad and I cannot see a cruise as being one of them.

oldmom Sun 17-Mar-19 12:04:21

I think you have two choices.

1. Do the cruise. Tell your offspring, this is what's on offer, all are welcome, let me know if you're coming.

2. Choose something else, which maybe all will be happy with.

IN all probability no. 2 will not be possible. Maybe your eldest DS and DIL don't want to cruise, maybe they don't want to go on a big family holiday? My ILs sometimes come up with ideas like this, and DH and I never go. I'm fine with my PILs, and I can handle one BIL at a time, but the whole lot together? Absolutely not! This kind of thing may work for some families, but many other adults don't really want to spend precious holiday time with their siblings.

Your DS and DIL are not being unreasonable in declining the cruise, but neither do you need to accept their suggestion of a villa. You decide what you want and do that, and let them then accept or decline as they wish.

Craftycat Sun 17-Mar-19 12:07:31

I'm sure a pool & a beach would be far more to their taste.
Children love the sea & sand & lots of other children to play with. Leave the cruises for older people.
But then I find the idea of being stuck on a ship a thing of nightmares. Nothing on earth would get me on one- all that water around & no land you could swim to if you had to ( even if you could swim & I'm not very good at it)
I couldn't stand having so many people around either- I like a very quiet, secluded cove with just half a dozen sunbeds & a nice shallow bay.
Luckily I know just the spot- roll on July!

Ranworth1 Sun 17-Mar-19 12:12:12

Thank you all for your fascinating (and diverse!) comments - so much truth in all of them.... and I am still no further forward, until we have a family conference! party

tw1nkle Sun 17-Mar-19 12:32:39

Be careful what you wish for. Our 3 generation holiday in UK for my DH’s 70th, which we booked and looked forward to a year in advance, was supposed to last a week. It was almost a bloodbath, we all came home after 2 nights. Oldest GS was traumatised. Resulted in my eldest DD separating from her husband. However 2K well spent to be rid of SIL. x

Gonegirl Sun 17-Mar-19 12:36:07

Can young children run about on decks of cruise ships?

Gonegirl Sun 17-Mar-19 12:37:53

Good grief twinkle! Do you want to tell us more? (Nosey cow)

midgey Sun 17-Mar-19 12:45:21

twInkle sounds horrendous, but at least you all remembered THAT holiday!

Wildrose24 Sun 17-Mar-19 12:59:02

Have you thought about taking each family separately to do what appeals to them and then take a short break for all at somewhere like center parcs. Then everyone does what they enjoy and you still get to be together.Children could contribute if money was an issue for the center parcs type break.

BlueBelle Sun 17-Mar-19 13:01:04

I ve never wanted to cruise and if I had the choice between a cruise and a lovely beach the beach would win every time especially with young kids involved
Hellsgrandad I ve just had a lovely long weekend at Centreparc with daughter and two grandchildren Everyone loved it I ve also had beach holidays in Menorca, Tenerife etc etc when grandkids were smaller I personally wouldn’t want to confined kids to a boat at all much more of an adult holiday in my opinion

Not my family Twinkle but a close friend paid thousands for a big family holiday for their 50th wedding anniversary two daughters, husband, plus their children the two daughters had a huge falling out and one daughter and family left after a few days, they didn’t talk for nearly a year putting the parents in a horrible situation, although things seem ok now The grandparents who paid for it all were badly hurt

Wildrose24 Sun 17-Mar-19 13:06:51

Have you thought of doing a separate holiday with the family who would like the villa holiday as well as the cruise.That way everyone gets a holiday they would enjoy.You could later all have a short break at center parcs or similar.Children could contribute if money is an issue.

chattykathy Sun 17-Mar-19 13:07:20

We had a 3 generation holiday at Center Parcs in France, a wonderful time had by all! The weather was great and the children had the thrill of learning a bit of French along with all the usual attractions of CP.

vickymeldrew Sun 17-Mar-19 13:36:36

I know there are always exceptions, BUT I firmly believe that the only people who ‘don’t like cruises’ are those who haven’t been on one !!

Summerlove Sun 17-Mar-19 14:03:28

I’ve done two cruises, and been sea sick on both, it wouldn’t be my first choice to do again. Nor would I take a young family on one just to please other people.

Every family has different needs. I’m surprised by people saying that son should suck it up/be more grateful.

I would either find another option, or do two separate holidays.

I think it’s lovely you want to treat your family in this way

trisher Sun 17-Mar-19 14:03:36

vickymeldrew I've been on one cruise- now known as the "Cruise from hell". My mother had a fall on the first night and the captain threatened to disembark us at the next port because I asked for a wheelchair (she felt unsafe walking far after the fall). We were stuck in a force 9 gale outside Lisbon (so never saw it)-there were objects flying about the cabin and I sent 2 days laid out with sea sickness (in spite of taking tablets). I hated the queues to get off and on and the checks to examine what you brought on board. I hated the pretend 'luxury' which is just Philippino and Asian staff working long hours for very little. I hated that they tried to sell you photos etc all the time. And to cap it all on our last day a passenger had to be lifted off by an Air Sea Rescue helicopter because he had had a stroke. NEVER AGAIN!

Telly Sun 17-Mar-19 14:13:40

Go back to the others and just tell them that not everyone is happy with a cruise and then find something that would suit everyone - Centre Parcs is a good idea, a hotel that caters for children, villa etc. etc. Ask the couple who do not want to cruise for their suggestions. I suppose it is possible they are not keen a big family get together?