A ‘ Three Generation’ holiday

After reading these I'm glad I haven't booked for dds1 and2 and family to celebrate our golden wedding. We're going to Seahouses! It's lovely in a fish and chippy way but if the weather is bad you just hope for the wifi to work to download kindles. I think op should just have two holidays, one cruise,one beach.

I’m another who’d recommend Centre Parcs for this sort of family holiday. We did as a previous poster, had one super duper villa there with its own sauna, games room, parking and hot tub, and a couple of standard lodges nearby, then we could all share the facilities. Lots to do for everyone, together or separately, and we all got together for evening meals, sharing the cooking or eating out. It was great. But.... I’ve just looked at prices with a view to doing it again next year, and the cost in school holidays is at least double what we paid. We’ve all shared a big holiday home as well, but it was very near interesting towns and sights as well as beaches. Lounging about by a pool or on a beach for a week would drive me mad with boredom. As for booking two holidays - apart from the cost, doesn’t that go against the whole idea of a family holiday?

We approached two 3 generation holidays (2017 and 2018) in a large house in the highlands with some trepidation as our 'family of origin' are all people who like our own space and the two partners were last minute "Oh, alright then" people whom had only met a handful of times over the years. We were rather taken aback that DS and his partner bore the children (6 & 3 yrs) off for the whole of their 3rd day during their 3 day stay and then DD's partner did the same for 2 days of their 6 day stay. However, we were also surprised at how tired we were doing stuff altogether on the other days and really needed the respite. We particularly appreciated the day we spent exclusively with DD while her children were out with her brother and his partner. It was not quite the gathering we imagined for DH's 70th but it worked out fine. A cruise would not, however, work for any of us. I think ours is a family of folk who tend to need time to themselves.

..."we had only met'...

Problem is, if you do opt for the villa holiday it will surely be self catering and who will be doing all the cooking? ?

My daughter came into a bit of money and offered to take everyone to a lovely villa for a week. One of her brothers said why would I want to spend a week with you all,I'd prefer my share of the money to have our own holiday. More fool her, she paid for his holiday too.

Utterly hated our cruise and turned down the suggestion that we might accompany my DD and her family on one this summer.

Hate the idea of a cruise, and as for taking young children that is a no no to me. Children like to run about, have a bit of freedom who;ch is hard to do if you are a parent on a boat, however big. I had a holiday with all the family and 5 gc at Croyde Bay at the Unison Holiday Resort. Excellent facilities for kids, right next to the beach, Benny Bear Club and kids disco in the evening and best of all happy staff.

Barmeyoldbat is that the place that used to be the Nalgo holiday camp? I spent a holiday there when I was about 10. Didn't realise it was still there.

Speaking as someone who wouldn’t go on a cruise if it was the last holiday option ever, I know where they’re coming from but that isn’t the issue is it. I think you’re on to a loser, expecting to please everyone and by trying to convince some of them, it’ll be bound to turn out a disaster I’d say. If there really is nothing that they would all like to do, I’d drop the idea personally. It is a lovely idea to have all the family together but it may not be possible.

Had an early Mother's Day lunch today, due to d.i.ls having own Mums and will want to spend the actual day with them. Anyway, like you Ranworth, I was also planning to treat them to a long weekend in Barcelona, for my big bday. There are 1 divorced daughter, her 2 teenage children, 2 AS, their wives and 2 toddlers each and myself. This is a once in a lifetime thing, so I don't mind. I don't have a lot of money (I am divorced) , but what I have, I can't take with me. So, I am thinking of a 4 bedroom villa.

You and me both Gingergirl I would sooner stay at home and spring clean! !!

Family holidays can be like Christmas, triumph of hope over experience. It's better to agree to have separate days and days together at the venue so that everyone has a break. I would go for the large rental house option with agreement in place over cooking and general chores. Good luck.

Ranworth Why don't you get your children and their children to do the heavy lifting on this? Ask them to come up with four or five suggestions, timings and places and you get to choose? Don't know where you are but I'd be renting a big place with loads of stuff around to do including (if UK) two sitting rooms and loads of board games. And making sure everyone guarantees to cook meals for the family and wash up.

I know how easy cruises seem and how well they suit people. But I'd be concerned about all the waste that goes on, the sewage pumped into the oceans, and the impact on places in the Med and Caribbean where thousands of people trot off and trot on having seen bugger all. I'd also be concerned about health - if someone gets D&V it's bingo for the rest of the ship.

We have had years of very successful 3 generation holidays. Sadly have now had to stop as it is becoming just too expensive/difficult to find self catering accommodation AND a date that we can all do.
We have sometimes used 2 properties on the same complex---usually converted farm buildings, which also works well.
TBH a cruise is the last thing that our children would agree to. The idea of our holidays is to be together as a family, though still with scope to do our own thing (though most days ended up with us all wanting to do the same thing),
Not sure that a huge cruise ship is the place for an extended family to spend time together.

I wouldnt go on a cruise, even if it was free. How fun is it to ruin the planet our kids will be left? Not much, no I wouldnt be involved.

Why not start a bit smaller and IF it works maybe build up to a bigger longer trip. E.g. a large cottage in the UK rented for a long weekend

I don’t see them as ungrateful at all! We would never go on a cruise with our small children. My husband would hate every moment of it.
How is that a holiday for him?
Our holiday time is so valuable that I would absolutly make sure that it was perfect and exactly what we wanted.
But I’m more than happy to pay our own way so wouldn’t demand any of the OPs money.

P.s. if you are working no holiday is "free" so the old "dont look a gift horse in the mouth" thing doesnt work so well....

It still "costs" you, either in lost business or workload you need to make up or just the opportunity to take leave for something you do find relaxing/reviving.

Taking holiday costs you money before you spend a penny on it in terms of airfare or accomodation especially if you are self employed or on zero hours. There might even be school fines (my kids dont have the same school terms as their cousins, so likely someone would be taking time off school to go)

.. so really its not "ungrateful" to not want to take holiday for something you wont enjoy

DH and I take the same FULL 2 weeks off together maybe once every 2 years at most.

We take bits and pieces that over lap. Or take it separately. I am on leave this week, DH is not. Its not awful we have lots of shorter breaks and little trips. But a big trip is a big deal and it doesnt happen often. We all have to really enjoy it!

At my work there are all kinds of rules about how you can take your annual leave. A BIG trip needs to be booked about 18 months in advance.

I worked with a disabled lady as a pa carer on a cruise and liked it so much. Persuaded OH to go on one with me - he was dead against it but really loved it so much we go every 2 years now. There is everything for children clubs pools nursery etc on the royal Caribbean lines. Have a look online.

Could you not go on the cruise with the ones who want to go on that and then ask your other kids what would suit them and go with that? I know you are going to be paying, but you can’t force folk to do what they don’t want to do or they will just resent you.

It's a very kind offer, but it's better for them to decline graciously than to come along on a holiday that turns hellish if they don't want to be there.

We’ve been away with both our daughters and their families, but only to places we’ve been to on our own before, and I can be sure they will like it. I love seeing the grandchildren in the water, on the beach etc at places I know and love. I think if you don’t go somewhere they all fancy it is a total waste of money. You couldn’t pay me enough to go on a cruise, especially one which catered for kids ( uurrggh, other peoples kids!!), it could be a disaster. And half the enjoyment is the anticipation, if you are going to worry about it, back out!

Sorry op cruise would be hell on Earth for me.

We book s very large house every year in the isle of wright and our 4 grown up kids and families are welcome every year. Some come some don’t. Up to them.

We are lucky as we can afford this plus a holiday with just dh and I but that said it’s our gift they are quite welcome to accept or decline. Offers there it’s not a summons.

Either put it out there as the holiday and it’s up to them to accept or decline or get them to liaise between themselves.

Never would I pay centre parcs! Daylight robbery for basically cycling in our local woods and going swimming.

A sister and BiL of mine have twice taken their adult dcs, their spouses and Gdcs on a paid-for holiday, but both times it's been a nice hotel/pool/beach type, which although it's not their own preferred holiday, they knew it was what the family would enjoy best. Very successful both times.

As a cruise fan, as is DS2 and family, my worst nightmare would be to be in a resort for a week, at least you get to a different destination each day on a ship. Also there are smaller options than the 6000 passenger jobs. BUT I accept each to his own. We had a good 3 generation holiday 3 years ago touring New England with an 8 month old and 3 year old. We did stay 2 or 3 nights in each place.