The Men in White coats are coming for me soon [confused] there's room in the van for a few more!

And I also once put the Avon catalogue in the freezer! And I will often peel and chop veggies for cooking and will tip the chopped veg into the food waste bin along with the peelings...

When my late mate was due to move in with me, a friend came round to say "How exciting! How do you feel?" So I said I was trying to Act Natural and pretend it was all perfectly normal, all spoken while I was winding the flex round the iron and placing it neatly in the fridge.
Someone please baggy my place on the van, I'll be there in a tick....

Room for one more ?
I once pointed out the pretty horses in the field, and started to sing a (made up) gallopy gallopy song before I remembered there were no children in the car only me and a work colleague that I was car sharing with !

I'm confused. Is it a bus or a van?
I took FiL who's 90+ to the diabetic clinic at the hospital recently.
I dropped him off and went to park.
I found the clinic, he wasn't in the wating room so I assumed he was being seen.
I sat watching tv reading mags for 20 mins before asking for him .
Not here and yes it was the diabetic clinic but he was not on the list.
I look at the letter.
It was the heart clinic a way down the corridor.
Luckily I caught him before he vanished. He had known where he was to be.

It could be worse- I dropped a form into doctor on Friday & there was an elderly lady in front of me apologising for being late for her apt. which she said she had thought was 11.30 but then realised it was 10.30.
The receptionist gently explained she had no apt that day & she had come in the day before with her son & seen the doctor then & was due to come back the end of next week. The poor lady was arguing that she had not seen any doctor for weeks.
I couldn't get it off my mind all day- I really felt sorry for her as she was getting quite distressed. They handled it very well but even so ... It was so sad.
At least she has a loving son keeping an eye on her I suppose.
There but for the grace of God as they say...

Hows this for a quick appointment. I rang at 11.45 and was told if I could get there by noon there was a cancellation. I just made it in time.

I too have gone to the doctors a week early. Last night I got into bed, put on my glasses and picked up my book. Couldn't see very clearly so thought glasses needed cleaning. Out of bed cleaned glasses, back into bed still blurry. Then twigged, I hadn't removed my contact lenses. Will the bus stop at the end of my street please?

I was standing at a lift this week pressing my car keys getting annoyed the lift doors wouldn't open. One other person waiting who leaned over saying he generally found it quicker to press this button pointing to the up/down arrows. Scarlet face, could have fried an egg!

I once took an item back to Tesco to complain but felt very silly when the assistant looked at the receipt and said 'but you bought this at Sainsburys'

Several years ago now I went to the hairdresser a week early to much hilarity on the part of the staff. But the most heinous error was to turn up for a theatrical performance which I was sure started at 7.30, thinking I was in plenty of time, at 7.10. I was, luckily, allowed to sit on a little seat beside the ushers until the interval. And I may add, in mitigation, that I wasn't the only culprit!
OK, put me on the roof.

I had a tidy-up of my purse and put my credit and other plastic cards into two piles. One pile was for current cards the other for expired cards and cards I never used. I then set about cutting up the cards ..... it was only as I surveyed the neat pile of plastic shreds that I realised I’d destroyed the wrong pile.
I promise I won’t destroy my ticket if you let me on the bus.

I once tried to open the passenger door on a stranger's car to put my handbag in, the driver was sitting in the car in my defense it was the same size & colour as my car but I had my keys in my hand & hadn't unlocked my car

Room for a little one? I can drive if you don't mind going on a Mystery Tour

I once put my door keys in the peg bag - took a while to find them....

Ginny42 Lol at that

I turned up at my aunts' funeral a week early. Stood in the graveyard dressed in black panicking as no other relative to be seen. Rushed over to a man tending a grave to ask if there were two cemeteries. Found out next nearest one I would never get to in time. Tried to ring my cousin. No reply. Ran around the cemetery in case there were two chapels. Got back to car when my cousin called me back and said 'It's next week you fool'.

Rang the florist to explain I am an idiot. Fortunately, she had already figured that out for herself as all the other orders for the same funeral were for the following week.

Been a standing joke in the family ever since as 'Breeze who went to Aunties funeral twice'.

Was in Boots at the till I was looking at the assistant and announced You haven't given me my change,she then announced You haven't given me any money !Red Face

Went to the wood yard to get something for DH, paid and then got in the car. About 5 minutes later a gentleman knocked on my window and asked if someone would be coming soon to,move the car so that he could get out. It was then that it dawned on me that although I had driven there I had got in the passenger seat and was waiting for someone to drive me home . A seat for me please!!!!

Happens all the time, at least twice I have travelled all the way to London (at considerable cost and two hours in a train) only to find I am:
§ A day late
§ A week early
§ A month too soon
Etc ad nausium

I put it down to stress but I think in all honesty I am turning into my Dad, whose mother always called him Absent-Minded Alfie (we knew him as Jimmie) - he’d forget his own name if you gave him half a chance as my Mum often remarked !

I remember someone posting some years ago about getting in the passenger seat and the realising she had driven there on her own.
As there were several people about who had seen her she got out muttering something along of the lines of
"well if he thinks I'm sitting here waiting for him he is wrong, he can make his own way home"

I recently booked an appointment with my usual doctor, turned up in plenty of time, greeted with ‘Surgery closed’ notice. Gathered my thoughts, went to one of the other surgeries connected to the practice, was told my surgery always closes on Thursday afternoons (thankfully I go so rarely that I had no idea this happened), receptionist grudgingly said I could wait to see my doctor (I was then 2 minutes late)’ apologised to doctor, who said ‘Don’t worry, it happens all the time’. Note to self: check which surgery to go to!

Not long ago I was waiting for a friend to pick me up, knowing the friend's car was "new". A car stopped outside my house and I hopped in the passenger seat to realise it was a total stranger. He was probably glad he did not live around here.

I will be happy to drive the bus but I cannot guarantee where we will end up.

Phoned the State Pensions office - very irate informing them my Pension was not in my account - to be told its not due in today - I replied it always goes in on a Friday - sorry Madam but today is Thursday.

I also thought it was Mother's Day a week early. Daughter thought I was a bit stupid I think. Can I come in the car, I need to be with people who don't find fault with me. Sob sob.

Yes Paddyann I was convinced Mothering Sunday was today and yesterday evening I was feeling sorry for myself about not having heard from either of my sons about visiting today, as they always do on Mothering Sunday.

Ginny42 that’s funny. ?

Apart from putting the wrong things into fridge and microwave (they are beside each other, it's only natural ...) the thing that gets me every time is the car remote. WHY don't they open the front door of the house?? It seems to me a perfectly logical thing, you should be able to programme them so that they do car and house.

And why on earth did Hyundai sell more than one red i10? Times I've stood beside aforementioned vehicle cursing at the remote which wouldn't open the doors, only to spot out of the corner of my eye the lights on mine activating a few rows along.

This is happening quite a bit at the moment as DH is in hospital so I'm visiting every day - very busy car park. Doesn't explain, though, why when paying for parking the other day I carefully put my card in the slot for "Notes" and of course couldn't get it out again. All credit to my bank, though, I got a replacement in 36 hours!

I have been having sandwiches for lunch since I left the gas on after draining the veg , I only found out an hour later when i wondered why the kitchen was so warm !