Names

I find it terribly difficult to get uptight by a surname. By the time I was 8 I had had 3 different surnames and I added to the confusion by having another couple until I met my DH and we married. I've held this name for the last 24 years, the longest I've ever had the same name by about 7 times. Filling in a DBS form is a nightmare!

I totally get it. Dad is Jones. Mum is Smith. As the child of them both, dd is Jones Smith.

Yes, I can see where some people might get confused. Also, since the double last name isn't hyphenated, I can see where some people might think Jones is a second middle name and Smith is the child's last name.

But, Imo, mil is using Jones/the dad's name/her ds' last name as the child's last name because that's how she thinks it should be. She even calls the op "Mrs. Jones." It seems quite disrespectful to me and as if she thinks their names are HER decision. But as long as her foolishness doesn't affect records at school or work, it's not that big a deal, imo, just laughable, really.

Oh, and I meant to say, any confusion that may result over the years is for mum and dad to sort out. It's not for mil/gm to try to "fix"/prevent. And I don't think she's doing that, just trying to assert the status quo she's used to.

In fact, I see Razzy has already said that mil does this because she "doesn't agree" with Razzy's name being included. Somehow, I missed that post before.

About returning packages - I think simply neglecting to send an acknowledgement would be enough. Why go to all the trouble of returning them? But if this really bothers you Razzy, returning packages certainly seems like an option.

I agree with those who say the gc will probably tell her eventually and that might carry more weight, lol! I would treat it as a joke with my kids, though ("silly Gramma"). As I said above, it's disrespectful but laughable, too. Mil thinks she can turn back the clock, I imagine, but she can't.