to object to this type of invitation?

I agree kitty. I can understand that the school wants to make this a special occasion and perhaps a dress code will focus the attention of some parents, but there will be some who don’t understand smart casual, or can’t afford new clothes for the family, or who will make a point by turning up in whatever they like. I hope that their attendance will be seen as the most important thing - and that the attention will be on the pupils rather than the parents choice of clothing.

Smart causual is perfectly acceptable I think. It cover a lot of scope. It's not like they are saying Evening Wear only.

Hetty58 'I once had the pleasure of being on a panel interviewing a 'young lady' for a university job. She wore a vest top (no bra), tiny shorts and flip-flops. She had an impressive selection of piercings and tattoos. (Dare I add 'She was a big girl' too?) Although very well qualified we rejected her application on the assumption that she didn't really want the job!'

how sad - she probably would have been excellent, and as you said, well qualified. Had a similar experience and gave the person the job, as she interviewed brilliantly, had great experience and a fabulous personality. Once she had settled in, I asked why she dressed like that for the interview. She laughed and said 'isn't it obvious' and went on 'I truly don't want to workk for narrow-minded people who can't see past the 'uniform' and it worked, no?' She was amazing.

Is it maybe the venue that is specifying the dress code kitty not the school?

Bearing in mind I recently saw two women in the supermarket wearing pyjamas and dressing gowns at 2.00pm perhaps the school have had previous experience of parents not knowing what was suitable.

It's a shame that a school has to direct parents/carers in their dress code but sadly its probably just a reflection of society today. At my DGC's primary there are parents who bring their children to school in the most inappropriate clothes and wouldn't think for one minute that they should dress any differently for a prestigious event. I'm not saying that this is what happens at your DGS's school kitty . Oh and very well done to him for winning the Science prize. My son won a Science prize when he was 11 and was treat to a VIP day at a power station. He was in his element, no coincidence that he went on to be an Electrician.

I would not object to smart casual dress for parents. I work with people who some people would describe as not in a good financial situation, but they are clean, tidy and they dress appropriately.
Why look for Some thing to be offended by. Smart casual is often put on invites for social occasions. I find it patronising to even bring people's social status into it.

Jura2, company offices are places where the customers of the company often visit. What they see in the persons that work there can then affect work gained and in that everyone's future employment.

Therefore how the staff look and dress in those offices is important to all, and in that no one person or minor grouping should be allowed to jeopardise the future of all.

I'm with Kitty on this one - it's not for the school to suggest a dress code for such an event.

It was probably aimed at the vest & short wearers who'll take no notice, or likely not turn up anyway.

I am just happy to get an invite!!!

I don't think it's about "affording new clothes" at all . It's probably more a case of "please do not turn up in shorts or pj's" .

I too think you ABU kitty. Why would it offend you? IF you turned up in your scruff and people were dressed nicely wouldn't you then ask why you weren't informed of a dress code? Dress code doesn't mean expensive, it just means putting a little effort into it and in my book it is showing respect to these lovely young people in the same way you dress for a wedding or funeral i.e. to show respect.

Recently on holiday there was a simple dress code for evening meals and I was appalled at the amount of people grumbling that the couldn't wear their swimwear! Another topic but some people will just argue for the sake of arguing when there is nothing to get upset about.

Congratulations to your DGS and I am sure you will do him proud.

Who knows if it’s a case of being able to afford new clothes? The parents that can’t afford them don’t tend to advertise the fact. Not adhering to a dress will be a for a myriad of reasons as I said in that post.

jura I’m really surprised that you gave someone who turned up to a job interview dressed in similar clothes to a vest top and shorts. We’re a pretty casual team (although professional) but I wouldn’t give a job someone who couldn’t be bothered to make the effort with their clothes at an interview - even if they have a great interview (although we always have a huge number of applicants so they all tend to be great candidates by the time they’re at interview stage). The rule of thumb is dress more formally for interviews and then scale down to fit the team once you’re in the job. She was taking a real chance there!

If we expect our children to have an acceptable level of standard in their uniform, then parents should act as the role model and do the same.

Well done to your GS for winning his science prize?. The parents are lucky they were invited. GS went to a school sports excellence awards ceremony last night at a local hotel and parents were not invited. They were accompanied only by teachers. As their school uniform is a non blazer affair, they were asked to wear either a suit or some smart clothing and I understand all the children were very well turned out. I assume that had parents been invited they too would have stepped up to the plate, but you never know. People’s attitudes to what is acceptable dress are very different. I never get upset about dress codes. I hope your GS enjoyed his evening.

Jura2, we're not too much in disagreement as I wear whatever I like but for an administrative, customer-facing role the 'rules' still apply, unfortunately. Sometimes I'll dress very smartly and other times casually (never boringly) depending on the weather, my mood and where I'm going. I must admit, though, to an aversion to the baring of flesh (except on a beach). I shouldn't mind but find it repulsive!

This happened at our DGCs' school and I had similar mixed feelings. No-one seemed to object, indeed, I think many were grateful for guidance.
At a tactful school (and ours is excellent) someone will be making sure that there will be a quiet word to anyone who is struggling to find something appropriate. Mostly though, it is not about cost (there are only a very few who don't have / can't get plain trousers & shirt from a charity shop) but about the kind of inappropriate dressing described above.
Personally, I don't really care, but as posters have pointed out, a 'laissez-faire' attitude may mean the kids have no idea as they get older, and it can hamper them.

Having said that, when our kids were at school, in a very mixed area, the parents dressed appropriately, apart from one dad who was an 'on call' breakdown driver. We all knew this, he was as neat and clean as possible, given he was in work clothing, and we were glad to see him there. Easier for the district nurses and midwives whose 'on call' clothes looked more normal.

I also think there may be some children whose parents don't want to support such events, and I hope the school can be helpful (it was, as many of us recall, always thus)

As for Tedber's point - they had a choice as to whether to book that holiday or another one!

Well done to the Dgs. I find a dress code helpful, not patronising. There are so few events in everyday life that merit a bit of an effort. Smart casual isn't difficult to achieve but it is a step up from shorts and a teeshirt. I'm always happy to bring out the pearls...but perhaps not the tiara!

I do think some people do need guidance on what is suitable these days. I recently attended a funeral and a woman showed up wearing a very short white lace dress.

Is "smart casual" "prescriptive"? I would have thought that it left a huge variety of choice and just ruled out turning up in shorts, flip fops, jammies or workwear. I think many parents would welcome the guidance, after all turning up at an event in something inappropriate is embarassing for everyone including your child

Nanarose my POINT was that people will take offence/argue about anything even reasonable requests (who goes to a restaurant in a bikini? .....the holiday was irrelevant.

How refreshing that people are being asked to dress smartly. I am sick of seeing people wearing ripped jeans, scruffy t-shirts and dirty trainers. It’s a lovely opportunity to dress up and make your grandson proud of you.

when our kids were at school, in a very mixed area, the parents dressed appropriately, apart from one dad who was an 'on call' breakdown driver. We all knew this, he was as neat and clean as possible, given he was in work clothing

Oh dear I daren't say what I would really like to say to this comment nannarose I wonder did you put newspapers down for him to stand on ?

On Saturday morning I saw children and parents heading for the school speech day of a local fee paying school. All the children were in smart school uniforms, but the dress of the parents varied between smart casual and shorts and sandals. This was mostly males I have to say.

I think it is very good of the school to make it into a special occasion for the pupils. Well done to your Grandson Kitty.
As for parents not being able to afford smart clothes, haven't they ever heard of charity shops? You can get a nice dress for £5 or so, smart men's trousers for about the same, and men's shirts for about £3. When my husband died 3 years ago I donated his clothes to a charity shop and went in about 2 weeks later, I saw the prices then, and also noticed that his black scarcely worn DJ was only £8!!!
I hope you have a lovely day.