To think granddaughter is too old for a dummy

BradfordLass72 - how I do agree that the child's comfort takes precedence.

Children clearly have to learn that there are some things they cannot do or have - touch hot hob or play with the veg knife.

But a dummy is not one of these things.

OP please keep out of this - your opinion about the dummy is to my mind (and many others) wrong, so that is one good reason to keep zipped. The other is that bringing up children can be stressful enough without someone trying to pile guilt on your head for doing the right thing.

I shudder at this attitude that encourages parents to rush their children along through their various stages, and dictates when they should or should not be doing things.

Childhood is a precious and unrepeatable time that needs to be treasured; and what parents do when their children are little influences their futures. We should respect this special time and not be dictating what they should do when. They are individuals.

father christmas took my daughters dummy away at 3 years old. in exchange for a gift..a new rabbit (blue) we lost the pink one... my daughter still has what is left of the blue rabbit. my daughter is 34 ,bunny has had several sew up operations but he's still going ..my gc only had dummies for bed time only...

Oh Luckygirl I wholeheartedly agree with you.

Her parents need to just gather them all up and chuck them in the bin.

Dummues should be thrown in the bin the moment the first tooth comes through.

Surely at 5 she'd have had school friends comment?

Lord above there are some folk with some very harsh, hard and fast opinions on this subject! If the parents and the child are happy regardless of the child’s age it really is no one else’s damn business

The OP asked for opinions, Nanna58 and posters were giving just that - opinions
Plus some helpful advice, which was also for the OP not to express an opinion to her DD.

Sorry luckygirl but tonks says she doesn’t just have it at night but in the day sometimes
What bothers me is that the mother is afraid to upset the child or take a firm stance what happens when she gets more challenging unfortunately you do have to upset children sometimes to make it right for them

nanna58 of course it’s no one business but it’s been posted on here to ask opinions it doesn’t mean those opinions will be acted on just asking and having a chew over that’s all We aren’t all going to rush over to tell the daughter off nor I m sure is the poster tonks ?

I was thinking of getting coach party to up to go and tell her what we think!

Miss A ???????

We could go and seize all the dummies, MissA, search all the hidden places (doll's house, lego box, behind the books in the bookcase?) and triumphantly put them in a beautifully embroidered bag for the fairies to take away.

It could be a lovely day out, a real Gransnetters meet-up.

What bothers me is that the mother is afraid to upset the child or take a firm stance what happens when she gets more challenging unfortunately you do have to upset children sometimes to make it right for them

I absolutely agree that over important things that really matter parents are called upon to take a firm stance - as I said above, sharp knives, hot stoves demand firm action to keep a child safe.

The mother's fear to upset the child does not lie in being unable to take a stand when needed, but because she knows her child best and knows that, at this moment, she still needs the comfort of a dummy. Well done that Mum!

I don't like the use of dummies at any age. I've seen children running around with them in their mouths looking like plugs. Why do they need then when they are doing fun things - they are supposed to be a comforter, not an accessory. I'd much rather see a child sucking its thumb. My daughter sucked her thumb at night until she was nearly 13 - she has perfect teeth!

Bradford lass, your experience shows why having an outsider poke their nose in where it's not needed is such a bad idea. It's nothing like keeping away from hot things or sharp knives is it. So many are saying that they'd upset the child for something that is not unsafe or any if their business, just because if their opinions on age or whether small people should have dummies in the first place. Or worrying about other children seeing them with one, so what if they do, maybe they think I've got a dummy like that, or I wish my mam hadn't thrown my dummy away. When my children went off to a sçhiol trip at age 8 every child had a teddy or some such comforter, yes they did talk about them beforehand with the result that both mine decided to take one even though they weren't bothered about them. They wanted to be the same as everyone else. They didn't know if any if them had a little bag with a dummy in, at age 7 they had the manners to accept that different people do different things and if it's harmless and no business of theirs you don't need to say anything.
As I said neither if mine had one ever so I'm not defending a choice I made

No dummies after aged 2 and long before that if it can be managed.
You don't want your GC to still use it at school age...surely.
There may be tears and tantrums which shows that the only reason parents give babies a dummy is to keep them quiet. Not a good idea. Weather the storm and remember for the next occasion.

that is not trueGabriellaG54 mine and many thousands like him were given them to help a sucking reflex and to keep their airways open .Never to keep him quiet ,actaully my wee soul didn't cry at all for his first few months,even when having needles stuck in his heel a few times a day ,he used to screw his face up but not a sound came out .It used to break my heart.

I agree with you that she's too old to have a dummy but, in your position, I'd perhaps not say anything.

A lot depends on the relationship you have with your DD and whether or not you think she'd take your views on board.

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

I sucked my thumb at night until I was baout 8. I also wore braces as I had prominent teeth.

Those two fact are unrelated. My teeth stuck out because I had a relatively small jaw and the teeth were overcrowded. When I started orthpdontic treatment, the first thing that was done was to remove two of my teeth so that the prominent teeth had somewhere to relocate to when they were eased back.

Zombie thread

Yes it is Hithere hopefully the child will have dispensed with the dummy now she is eight.

What Luckygirl said ⬆️

I have learned over the years to keep my lip zipped and only offer an opinion if asked. I have lots of opinions and it nearly killed me at first. But my children are all excellent parents and doing a fine job.

I accept that the subjects can still be relevant, but I sometimes wish GNHQ would block commenting on old threads, as I think they do on Mumsnet. I always feel a bit sad to read posts from members who we know are no longer with us (and I'm always well into a thread before I realise it's an old one).

It's nearly always a spammer who opens up the old thread.

Maggiemaybe
Watch how many posters ignore your post ?

Ah well spotted Maggiemaybe. I missed that!
Wouldn't it be great to have a "turn off commenting" button for when a thread has run its course?