trisher 
although, I must say, I have heard something similar but I signed the OSA!
Being quizzed by chemist's assistant in Boots.
Gransnet forums
AIBU
Hello all, good wishes and pass the smelling salts to those who may have had a fit of the vapours at me posting on AIBU (I think it may be the second time?)
Aaaanyway, had a call yesterday from J, a friend. We speak a couple of times a week, but havent actually seen each other for about 18 months, (even though we live reasonably close, about 20 minutes drive, which is reasonably close by Devon standards!) since they downsized to a tiny bungalow. (They keep threatening to invite us over, but it never happens, I have invited them to us, but J' s job involves very odd hours, getting up at 2am etc.
After the usual chit chat, me telling her about flooded bathroom on Monday 
, Mr P being unwell, losing days at work and therefore pay, asking after her father who has just had a knee replacement, she proceeded to tell me that it was her first grandchilds christening on Sunday December 1st, at 9am.
There is a gathering afterwards at the Memorial Hall, her daughter thought that bacon rolls and a bit of Christening cake would do. Sounds sensible.
Then she asked if I would be prepared to go to the Memorial Hall and cook the bacon I wouldn't be expected to do any of the clearing/cleaning after, just cook the bacon.
They would be happy to pay me, and take Mr P & I out for lunch after.
I was so caught off guard, that I was ( to use the vernacular) gobsmacked! Said I would get back to her.
I'm not prepared to do it, don't want to be tied in to being somewhere quite early on a Sunday morning, prefer to wander around in my PJ's drinking coffee!
However, as a gesture, I have contacted a local caterer who comes to my place of work and does bacon rolls from her van (not one with a cooking facility, iykwim) to ask her how she keeps the bacon hot.(J doesnt know this, will present her with the info)
Perhaps passing this info on to J will help 
Sorry for the ramble, so AIBU?
I won't be spitting on any bacon, because I wont be cooking it!
Planning to phone J tomorrow, unless of course she phones me first, will let you all know how the conversation goes
Of course, lemongrove, and I'll bring my feather duster, mop, bucket and polish so that I can have a bit of a clean round while I'm at it!
However, I'll be careful not to try to multi task, after all you wouldn't want your bacon over done!
PS We usually have either smoked fish creams or scrambled egg and smoked salmon for "brunch" on Christmas day, but if you want bacon sarnies, then so be it!
Tell her you cannot cook the bacon, you've gone vegan. Which is a good thing to do, by the way, for the planet, for your own health and love of animals! 
Wasn't there a Gransnetter or rather her DH recently invited to a reunion of former colleagues?
And 'Oh, by the way can he prepare several hundred crabs prior to the main event'?
Some people.
I am coeliac and so is one of my grandsons but I can see why it has become a lifestyle choice for some people. Giving up gluten can help improve many health problems including IBS, bloating and menstrual pain. It's also good for weight loss because GF bread is expensive so best avoided!!
Thankfully most good restaurants have recognised this and there is more choice than there used to be.
It makes me cross though that in the large food hall of our nearest, centre of excellence hospital, the only GF item available is either an egg sandwich or the ubiquitous rock hard chocolate brownie. 
You're OK if you want to stuff yourself full of unhealthy burgers, sausages, pizzas, chips, and cakes though. Plenty of that on offer.
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