60 years married

Congratulations

I get these kind of remarks from my older sister all the time (about doing the 'right' (boring, traditional, predictable) thing).

She is very concerned about fitting in, social status, family duty - putting these way above her own enjoyment. It all stems from a very deep insecurity that compels her to advise and act superior.

What do I do? I just laugh and carry on with my own plans!

Not s

Sorry, doing this on my phone.

You are not being selfish at all. Have your holiday, it’s your anniversary. Enjoy and best wishes.

How about throw a party but DON'T invite the friend who says you're selfish!

Another vote for a holiday from me. We have just had three weeks in India over Christmas and New Year. Family plans were complicated so we just opted out. It was great!

Congratulations and celebrations! If you cannot do as you want after achieving 60 years of marriage it’s a poor tale. Your ‘friend ‘ is wrong. It’s your special day, not hers, enjoy it.

Your birthday, your choice! Enjoy xx

Congratulations! You are not being selfish at all - go away and have a lovely time together & enjoy!

Go on holiday. Spend your money on yourselves. Often people are not at all bothered about going to a ‘do’, and it’s a relief not to be invited to one!

Enjoy your holiday. We are planning a special holiday for our big anniversary too.

Oh have the holiday,you never know maybe the family will plan you a party for when you get back,could do it in church hall or something just for family to cut costs?Congratulations!

I think it’s your friend that’s being selfish not you. I think after 60 years you deserve to make the choice how you spend it. Why not suggest that your having a holiday, and if she’d like to arrange a lunch to celebrate on your return you would be happy to attend. Congratulations

You are not being selfish. A holiday with your beloved sounds far preferable to a party.

Absolutely nothing wrong with going on holiday instead of throwing a party. DH's family aren't speaking to him atm because we didn't throw a party for his 60th birthday on Christmas Day. Why should anyone be expected to pay for a shindig that they don't want just to please other people? If they want to throw you a party (and pay for it) then fair enough but, if not, go on holiday and make new memories with you DH.

I can't understand why your friend thinks you are being selfish. Surely this is your celebration - you celebrate it how you want to - and congratulations.

Congratulations on your 60th Anniversary. What an achievement! I think you’re entitled to do whatever makes the two of you happy. It’s about you and your husband no one else.
I think your friend should mind her own business, it has nothing at all to do with her. Have your holiday together you deserve it.
It’s our 50 th next year and we’ve having a special holiday. To be truthful I can think of nothing worse than a party.?

How you celebrate is upto you, your friend should respect your decision. If they want to give you a party let them pay and organise it. Go away and enjoy yourselves.

We, as a family had a surprise family meal, a barbecue for the extended family and then paid for my parents to go on holiday for their 50th but I think that my dad would have been happy just with the holiday!
Do what you want, you are not being selfish - it is your anniversary after all.
If anyone else would like to arrange a party for you, that's a different matter!

Selfish?! Absolutely not. Many, many congratulations. Go away somewhere on your own & have a fabulous time. Perhaps when you get back you can tell all family & friends you will be in a certain pub on such & such a day for the afternoon & would love to see anyone who wants to wish you well. We do this for special occasions & people come & go as they wish, & mostly buy their own drinks & eats & more importantly there’s no stress for you. Enjoy.

Have your holiday! There are likely family members who will back you on this, as a "friend" not family she should not comment on what should be done. A wedding anniversary is a personal thing. Enjoy your break.

I think your friend is selfish - perhaps she likes parties and was looking forward to a free 'do'!
Enjoy your holiday and congratulations on the 60 years. Make special memories with just the two of you ????

How close a friend is she? Is there any possibility a surprise party HAS been arranged and you going away would obviously throw any such plans in disarray.

Otherwise, you should do exactly as you wish, it is your celebration and entirely your decison how you spend it.

I speak as someone who threatened her nearest & dearest with death if they even looked as if they might be thinking of a party for my 60th birthday.

The thing is about party's is....... It takes a lot of organisation you never get it right someone will always complain, you'll end up stressed and will be tired by 7pm not 10pm. Why bother this is about you and your OH if you want to go away go, pay no mind to your selfish friend she just wants a free evening out

It is the two of you that are celebrating, so you should do that in any way the two of you want - how would anyone know it wasn't just an 'ordinary' holiday anyway?