60 years married

Absolutely not being selfish! If that’s what you want to do then go for it. We did the same thing and family didn’t mind at all. I say go for it.

Do whatever you want - it’s your celebration.

We had a party for our 50th in our local village hall and it was a huge success. We invited a wide range of friends and relatives. However it was a lot of work and when we get to 60 years I think a holiday would be more likely.

Do what you want, there's nothing selfish about having a holiday together after 60 years of marriage.

I think that if you and your husband still want to be together , just the two of you then that’s what you should do !! I think it’s lovely. Xx

Congratulations. Certainly have your holiday. If your friend would like to organise a meal for you tell her to go ahead!

Go on holiday - if you've been married for 60 years you've no doubt put one parties, bbqs and meals and we all know that with the cost and work involved it's hardly a relaxing event for the celebrants. Have a lovely time and let other people put on a do for you if they are so inclined.

Maybe your friends should throw a party for you if they want to help you celebrate your anniversary.
If you can't have a special holiday after 60 years together , when can you. Go for the holiday and don't look back. X

Well I think your nosy friend needs to take a hike!!

Holiday! It was our 60th last year we had a lovely holiday. We had parties for our 25th,40th and 50th. Enough ,we said! After holiday we were taken out for dinners by our children and celebrations continued for several weeks, but we didn't have to make any effort on our part

Just like other wedding anniversaries, this one is for the couple. Your friend is out of order saying you are selfish. Do what you want and don't be browbeaten into something you don't want. 60 years, a great achievement, Congratulations.

It never fails to amaze me why these self-serving people such as your friend make these 'suggestions', when you've obviously mentioned your wish for a lovely relaxing holiday. Do not even attempt to justify your choice, just tell them all if asked ,that's your plan.
Much joy to you both for many years to come!

Been reading these with interest as our 60th is in June. I know how you are feeling as various mentions are made which seem more like a headache involving putting up relatives and work for us. We fancy a time away on our own and a meal out locally with the family that live nearby. The family mean well but there could be a tendency to take over if we don’t make our feelings clear.

Definitely the holiday, it’s about you two ultimately and you are not selfish.

Have a wonderful time ExD1938 and many many congratulations....

Congratulations, no it isn't selfish, it's your anniversary spend it how you want, if your friend wants a party let her organise a surprise one for you when you get back from your lovely holiday

We used to host parties for birthdays and such but it's a lot of work and expense and the guests can, well, be problematic- saying they will come and then not show or cancel at the last minute. Then there are the food preferences to consider and whether you'll have music/entertainment. If not in your own home then it's about hiring somewhere so all in all , since our 25th anniversary we've done our own thing, leaving parties to those who enjoy hosting and making sure we are good guests!

I was widowed at the age of 54. Never even made our 40th! I'm sure you deserve a very special holiday together, with just yourselves to consider for once. Enjoy the fact that you are both still alive, both well enough to enjoy a wonderful holiday. Give your husband a special kiss. I'm so envious.

You are not being selfish - you have every right to celebrate together and you don’t need to justify spending money on yourselves rather than on other people - however, it would be interesting to explore your friend’s perspective - does she know that there are lots of people who want to celebrate with you? If so maybe you could find the extra to hire a local hall where the catering can be done by yourselves and you make it clear to friends and extended family that you would like them to be able to toast more happy years together but would also ask them to bring a dish. You will be surprised what people bring and probably end up giving doggy bags out at the end of the evening. A local church hall or community centre in the afternoon or early evening will not cost a lot to hire - the fact that you are writing on this chat shows you are in a dilemma so think about doing both but getting your friends and family to pay their way.

You do exactly what you want to do - your friends should be delighted for you

Definitely not selfish. The two of you should be celebrating together!

Wow. I wasnt aware that it was compulsory to have anniversary parties!! Its our 25th later this year, I don't like parties and certainly dont intend to have one!!

It's entirely up to you two how you want to celebrate your 60 years together and no-one else's.

It's your anniversary so you spend it as you want. Personally I would rather go on holiday with my OH than have a large party for other people to enjoy. Choose somewhere really nice and have a great time both

Your friend is the selfish one because she is thinking of herself.

You should celebrate as you want to - and other people may want to celebrate too. 60 years is impressive! How about asking someone (family or friend) to organise a bring-and-share party after your holiday? That way everyone is included, you all have fun, and there is no huge bill for the party. I know people who had a bring and share wedding reception and it was great - everyone felt they had contributed and the couple didn't have to spend thousands.

Have the holiday - please yourself not everyone else. Congrats on your wedding anniversary ? - go away and have a fab time and don’t feel guilty. My 60th birthday is coming up and everyone wants me to throw a party but me and hubby are going to northern Spain for a holiday instead ? feel so good now I’ve made the decision!