Renewal of wedding vows - what's the protocol?

I’m with you lemon see my post 4 comments in ... ‘cringeworthy’.

Pleased to be weird with you CBBL! I hope your Vow Renewal service is a wonderful occasion for you both

My daughter!er went to one. Afterwards she kept referring to it as their Rewedding. It was very lavish apparently the same as the original one.

I don't have much of a view of the Renewal of Vows per se but if my husband suggested it, I'd look at him very suspiciously. I have known 3 couple go through this although never attended. Two of them split up reasonable soon after so perhaps theirs was a sticking plaster and the third one was a married boyfriend of a friend! I was somewhat taken aback when she told me what he was intending to do. I made up my mind there and then that my vows would not be renewed!

I've been to two vow renewal ceremonies, the first in 1972 and the second was several years ago:
1) The couple had been married in a register office, so took advantage of their child's christening by combining it with a service to renew their vows in a church.
2) The husband had confessed to cheating and hoped to demonstrate his new commitment to the marriage; they're still together.

I think that if a couple choose to do this then I'm happy to support them.

Each to their own but for us we don’t feel the need to renew our marriage vows,

Actually renewal of wedding vows has been around since the 50s that I know. The vicar at our local church in 1954 said he was going to have a renewal of wedding vows and at Sunday school we were given a paper announcing it to take home to our parents. My parents were coming up for their 15th wedding anniversary having married a few months before the beginning of WW2. So they decided they would like to take part. Mums first wedding ring had been like a gold curtain ring so unbeknown to her my father bought her a beautiful engraved ring which was much thicker than the original one. So when they renewed their vows my lovely dad slipped the new ring on her finger. It was followed by tea and cake. My Mum continued to wear both rings until she died in late 2014 so for 60 years. I now wear her original wedding ring on my little finger.
I have nothing against renewal of vows if people want to but I dont understand the need to wear a proper wedding dress and all the trimmings to celebrate 25 years of marriage. Especially when they wore a wedding dress the first time around too. Maybe I am just old.

I must be very innocent because it has never occurred to me that people might be renewing their vows because one of them had cheated. It certainly hasnt been the case in the ones I have been invited to. What a strange way to think.

I don’t see the point of renewing the vows. Marriage vows are quite specific, and the declaration is “for as long as you both shall live.” Till death us do part In other words.

If vows are meant the first time round and have been kept, why is there any need to renew them! It's just showing off, in my opinion.

@GrammaH
Very kind of you to give us your views too. ?

I've told before about someone I know who did the whole thing (white dress, bridesmaid, best man, flowers!) every year during a cruise. Her husband's business went bust and they divorced!

I can see why there might be situations where a couple might want to renew their vows, but I don't understand holding a second wedding with loads of guests present. That just seems tacky to me.

Some couples might want something to mark their important anniversary, 25, 30, 50 years. If we get to these landmarks I'll opt for a short break to celebrate. But like everything else, personal preferences. If you are invited to one I would take a bottle of drink/flowers or if a charity box has been organised then even better.

hicaz46, your post was very moving. What an emotional day that must have been for all concerned.

Just asked my DH if he would like to renew our wedding vows. He looked really startled and said “Whatever for? I don’t see the point!”
I’ll take that as a no, then.