Gransnet forums

AIBU

Sending private messages through GN

(58 Posts)
evianers Tue 04-Feb-20 16:50:45

Is it unreasonable when you feel you have something in common with other GNetters, and have therefore sent them a private message, that you might become upset when they simply do not respond?

kittylester Tue 04-Feb-20 16:56:37

They might not know that you have sent one unless they receive email notifications.

TwiceAsNice Tue 04-Feb-20 16:58:20

No I don’t think it’s unreasonable to expect a response, it’s good manners isn’t it?

I have had private messages over the years some I have initiated myself, some people have messaged me first. I have responded to them all ( and had good responses back).

Only once have I had a rude message which was decidedly odd in another way and I didn’t respond as it was so odd I thought it might be a scam.

I have been posting privately with a Gransnetter for a while and it’s really nice to keep it up.

Marydoll Tue 04-Feb-20 17:01:08

evaniers, some posters never look at their Inbox. Recently someone asked how to find their Inbox.
Try not to think of it as a slight, they may be unaware of your message.

lucywinter Tue 04-Feb-20 17:05:24

People dont always check their emails. I can go for days without checking mine. Which means that email notifications don't actually help. I doubt if it's meant rudely.

And sometimes people have several email addresses, and some don't always get checked that often.

Smileless2012 Tue 04-Feb-20 17:06:04

You could tell them in a post on a thread they're posting on that you've pm'd them.

nanaK54 Tue 04-Feb-20 17:07:53

This thread made me open my inbox, there was a message there from a week ago, I have now replied and apologised to the sender

ladymuck Tue 04-Feb-20 17:09:23

This site is unusual in that there is no obvious notification that you have messages. Other sites show a number beside your inbox.
There have been a few times when I haven't replied to a message for several days, simply because I didn't know it was there.

MaizieD Tue 04-Feb-20 17:10:48

On Mumsnet a star pops up on your inbox to notify you that you have a PM. I asked Gnet months ago if they could do something similar... They'd get round to it, they said...

It's ridiculous that you can only get email notifications.

So no, OP, you're probably not being ignored.

Marydoll Tue 04-Feb-20 17:19:18

I used to get a red star on my inbox telling me I had mail. It doesn't happen now.

Madgran77 Tue 04-Feb-20 17:20:59

They may not have seen the message. Unless a poster goes directly into their inbox they wont know there are messages!

rosenoir Tue 04-Feb-20 17:25:12

This has prompted me to look in my in box. There was a message from mid December.

Did you ask any questions in your message? if not maybe they did not feel it warranted a reply and just to acknowledge the message may have started a string of emails they did not want to get into.

I am certainly not suggesting anything negative about you but there are some users that I would not want to have conversations with so would not reply,even saying thank you may be seen as inviting more messages.

Fennel Tue 04-Feb-20 17:31:48

I always get an email notification from Gransnet when I have a pm.
I must have ticked a box in the past.
And I do check my emails daily.

Fennel Tue 04-Feb-20 17:42:38

ps I think you might mean me - I never replied to your last pm. Sorry.
I'll send you an email with our landline number.

Fennel Tue 04-Feb-20 17:47:25

I mean a pm - going doolally!

NannyJan53 Tue 04-Feb-20 17:48:25

I do get an e-mail notification, but it goes into my junk mail, and I have missed some, only realising after a week or two. In fact all my GN e-mail notifications go into my junk, even though I mark as not spam.

I try to remember to look in my inbox at least once a week now.

Bridgeit Tue 04-Feb-20 19:04:07

Some GNetters ,post on thread to say : I have/ will Pm you, which I think is a good idea.

Grandmama Tue 04-Feb-20 19:10:10

I have the problem that over the last year or so I don't receive Gransnet every day. No Gransnet email today. I think it is a problem with btinternet.

Callistemon Tue 04-Feb-20 20:01:17

I usually look at my inbox, usually there is nothing there sad

However, I never look at my email account but I did the other day and deleted a couple of pages of unread emails blush

NanaandGrampy Tue 04-Feb-20 20:30:21

I get an email telling me I have mail.

Marydoll Tue 04-Feb-20 20:59:17

Apologies if I'm teaching my granny to suck eggs.
If you go into your Inbox and click Settings, you should be able to request email notification of a PM.

If you click My Gransnet at the bottom of the page, you should be able to request the daily email.

I never bother with the daily email, I'm permanently logged into GN.

Urmstongran Tue 04-Feb-20 21:20:00

Only happened once (last summer) but I got a p.m. from a meanie. It unsettled me all day.
😱

Mapleleaf Tue 04-Feb-20 22:10:33

I no longer receive an email notification to say that I have received a PM so try to remember to check my inbox, but must admit that I don’t remember to do this everyday which means that I might miss a message from someone for several days before I think to check my inbox. Not sure why I no longer receive a notification. On that note, I’ll check my inbox now! 🙂

Beswitched Wed 05-Feb-20 06:05:36

I've done this several times on other forums. Belatedly realised that someone has sent me a lovely message and had to apologise and explain that I've only just seen it.

Liaise Wed 05-Feb-20 06:49:16

I can't get emails however hard I try with settings so like others just have to remember to check occasionally.