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AIBU. Noise from neighbors music.

(58 Posts)
JOJO60 Thu 25-Jun-20 12:57:08

Now the weather is really hot we have our windows open and all we can hear is the thud, thud, thud of the base from our neighbours outdoor speakers in their garden. It is driving us mad. Sometimes it's the 21 year old son, sometimes the mother (Dad is at work all day). We have asked them, nicely, to turn the music down on 2 occasions and they have been very apologetic and have done so. But next day it's back on again. We retired here 6 years ago because it's a quiet, semi-rural, area and none of our other (mostly retired) neighbours are noisy. Then, 18 months ago this family moved in next door and we have this racket every day. It wouldn't be so bad if we could hear the songs, but it's just this annoying base sound. We can even hear it when the windows are closed and we have to turn the TV up to drown it out. We try our best to ignore it, and now sit in the front garden, not the back which is nearest to them, but it is really starting to annoy us both. I dont want to be a moaning minnie, keep asking them to turn it down, as they are a nice family, but they just seem oblivious to it. I dont know what to do . DH is even thinking about moving house!

Alishka Thu 25-Jun-20 13:17:06

So, you can't actually hear the songs, only the bass? Ask them if their m/c has an equaliser and to dial it down a bit, perhaps?
It's a tough one,OP, cos it is only the bass notes which are annoying you. So

tanith Thu 25-Jun-20 13:53:56

Ask your neighbour to come in your garden and hear how loud it is, it might deter her.

Washerwoman Thu 25-Jun-20 14:41:32

Poor you.I hate this.And I can't understand why people think it's acceptable to inflict their music on others. Unless it was a one off party -in which case I would appologise in advance to neighbours-I wouldn't dream of anything more than a radio on very quietly.Unfortunately this seems ever more common and the current trend for decking gardens our as an extension of the house with speakers and lights has made life miserable for our DD recently with hee neighbours thumping music out.And the garden lit up like an Xmas tree.Rubbish for wildlife too.
I would try again nicely to explain how intrusive it is.Good luck !

annep1 Thu 25-Jun-20 14:53:30

I do sympathise. Hearing the bass is TERRIBLE. I know exactly what JOJO60 means. It's actually very stressful. We have the same problem. If it was nice melodic music I could cope better. I would never inflict my choice of music on anyone, but I am seriously thinking of putting radio 4 or Classic FM on loud at a time when it will possibly annoy them.
You are not a moaning minnie. They are making you complain continually. If you aren't really on speaking terms, and don't care about staying friendly with them, perhaps you should see what you can do legally. Look up the rules for noise nuisance for your area.
Moving doesn't always solve a problem. You could have a problem in your new home.
Why can people not be considerate of others? We use earphones in the garden. Ours have a barking dog too, and park in front of our house. And clatter up and down wooden stairs. And we had to erect a high fence when they built a very high patio. Grr.

Bellanonna Thu 25-Jun-20 15:42:13

Feel really sorry for you JoJo. Perhaps as someone suggested, invite them round so that they can hear it. Keep it friendly though, as you say they are otherwise nice people. Don’t move!

tickingbird Thu 25-Jun-20 16:18:03

I really do feel for you. I just can’t understand why people think they can inflict their music on the neighbours it’s so inconsiderate.

I don't really know what to advise unless you try to drown the noise out or buy some earplugs. Maybe even tell them that it’s driving you out and if they are genuinely decent people they’ll realise how bad it is for you.

JenniferEccles Thu 25-Jun-20 16:31:56

I feel for you too. I hate noise anyway but that thump thump base sound, especially at a certain tempo is so annoying.

You say they are nice people which is good so why not go round again and very politely say you can still hear their music.

It’s best to try to keep on good terms with them rather than going down the Environmental Health route if at all possible.

You could as has been suggested, invite them round to hear it in your house and at the same time you could say they must let you know if they can hear any noise from you.

That will help to keep it friendly.

AGAA4 Thu 25-Jun-20 16:33:43

My D and SIL had the same problem. They live in a detached house and you could hear and even feel the bass from next door.

My SIL politely mentioned the bass to them and things did improve. They weren't aware that it could be heard so far away.

grumppa Thu 25-Jun-20 16:34:57

Retaliation with Wagner’s Ride of the Valkyrie at full volume?

JOJO60 Thu 25-Jun-20 17:08:08

Thank you everyone for your support. We did try playing 1960's rock n roll very loudly one day (DH's choice) and they did turn theirs down, but I couldn't stand that every day either! I will go round to speak to them again though, this time when the father is home as he seems to be the most sensible one in the family.

Kate1949 Thu 25-Jun-20 17:11:28

I sympathise. Our neighbours have a dog which never stops yapping. It spoils our enjoyment of sitting out in the sun.

annep1 Thu 25-Jun-20 18:00:09

I've just realised you said they are otherwise nice so yes, I agree with not going down the environmental road. Speaking to the father/husband sounds a good idea. Good luck.

Nonogran Thu 25-Jun-20 18:42:53

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk Guidelines.

annep1 Thu 25-Jun-20 21:45:25

Thats awful nonogran. A peaceful little comnunity spoilt by one person.

Luckynan Thu 25-Jun-20 22:17:26

We are in the same situation with a family who live at the back of us. Couple both in their forties ( and both teachers) have their radio blasting out all day. We are able to move to the side of our garden but our other 2 neighbours, both widowed and in their eighties are very upset by it. As they say, they can’t even sit in their gardens in peace. I have offered to speak to these people but they are worried incase they cause trouble.
Like a previous poster my blood is boiling especially thinking of these 2 older people sitting in their homes when they could be enjoying the garden. Apparently another neighbour, who has since moved , did complain to the council and got nowhere. These neighbours have also got children who are still out screaming at 11pm. Needless to say they have also flouted the lockdown rules but have been out clapping every week.
Sorry for the rant just feel upset .

Bellanonna Thu 25-Jun-20 22:18:54

Awful story Luckynan.

ElaineI Thu 25-Jun-20 22:22:59

I do sympathise but this is a funny story. Our back garden backs onto a care home/convent with large grounds. You can sometimes hear Scottish music/singers in the summer if the doors are open but not intrusively. A couple of weeks ago DGS2 aged 2 was playing in the garden and suddenly there was really loud rap music with swear words reverberating round our whole street never mind our garden. "What that noise Granny" says DGS2. It went on for over half an hour. Then last week DH who didn't believe me, was treated to very loud music fortunately things like ABBA and again today DGS2 and I had very loud music - not things I recognised but not rap with sweary words as he played in the paddling pool. DH has found out somewhere (he is google addicted) that the care home has had a sound system installed and clearly the staff or entertainment team are using it to the full - don't know if the residents approve of the choices as many have dementia but it is very funny having this noise from a care home and at least you can hear the words not the bass. DGS2 likes it - he dances in the local co-op aisles as they have soft music "DGS2 dancing Granny!"
I do think it must be difficult Jojo60 though. My DM has the same problem but it's when her neighbour's children are playing (parent's have bass loud) and just now there are more children playing in their gardens as they can't even go to the park. I feel adults should be more considerate.

EllanVannin Thu 25-Jun-20 22:40:06

Plenty of loud bangs and fireworks still going off for Liverpool's football champions victory since 1990, both here where I am and over the water-----but who cares ? grin

I'm pleased for the people of Liverpool and its supporters.

Dee1012 Fri 26-Jun-20 08:57:47

EllanVannin, as a Liverpool supporter all my life, now exiled in the N.East, I'm thrilled!

On topic, I get up early to walk my dogs before the heat sets in and at 6.00 am this morning, I could hear very loud music from 3 houses and somebody hammering away doing d.i.y shock.
I do think the ignorance of so many is shocking!

Gelisajams Fri 26-Jun-20 09:08:52

Just to say you are not alone and we suffer the same. It’s funny how they respond for a day after you speak to them but they do it again the next day! Hopefully the thunderstorms and forecast cooler weather will drive them all indoors.?

Grandmalove Fri 26-Jun-20 09:17:03

I too am having problems with new neighbours. They bought the house for the view but decided to completely change the inside. For the last three months they have banging and drilling, often until ten o’clock at night. They then played music outside so that they could hear it as they worked. Our bungalows are quite close together so I could hear the noise inside too. Before they arrived, my garden was a very quiet place where I could go for a break after caring for my terminally ill husband, who died this month. I told them I understood that they wanted to get the house finished but didn’t think it fair that I had to listen to their music too. I said I would normally go out for a coffee but lockdown meant I was stuck at home.
The music did stop only to be replaced by a wind chime across from my back door. (They said it is like a wind tunnel there). Their next idea was to put their three dogs in a kennel in the same area. They barked non-stop when they were out.
The neighbours on the other side have a list of complaints too.
I’m thinking of moving as I can no longer enjoy the peace and quiet of my home and garden.

Mercedes65 Fri 26-Jun-20 09:43:37

Its not just loud music that's annoying. We have neighbours who put their dog in the back garden and it barks and yaps all day long many times until 10.00m.

Taliya Fri 26-Jun-20 09:45:43

Some people can just be very selfish. I used to live in a ground floor flat (1 year) and there was hardly any sound insulation so you could hear a lot of noise from the flat above and the flat above that (child jumping on floor or running around continously, and who lived above me worked shifts so some nights her have his friends round till 2am making a noise) to top it off there was a guy who lived in the same block but a floor up from my next door neighbour who was on the ground floor who had a drink and drug problem and he would play his music very loud at all hours of the day and night with his windows open so you could hear that deep booming sound from the base....I complained to him and the council and they sent letters then after a week he would start playing the music again. It caused me anxiety , trouble sleeping and ended in a panic attack. I moved last year to a lovely housing association first floor flat (top floor) with lovely neighbours. Yes, you hear a bit of noise but no loud booming music. It took about 5 months for my anxiety to go. Noisy neighbours can really affect you badly. If you live in social housing you can ask for an exchange of transfer if it's upsetting you so badly or go to your local council and they will ask you to download their noise app which records the music or noise as it happens and they may take action.

olliebeak Fri 26-Jun-20 09:57:42

@ElaineI - thinking about the 'Care Home' situation. When I worked in one (late 1980s) they were all little old ladies and gentlemen who had gone through WW1 and WW2 and some of them actually remembered life BEFORE WW1. The songs that they enjoyed were 'Nellie Dean', 'Pack Up Your Troubles', 'It's a Long Way to Tipperary' etc

These days, the Care Home Generation includes people born just before, and since, WW2 - so their sing-a-longs are more likely to be Frank Sinatra, Perry Como, Al Martino and possibly some Rock 'n' Roll like Bill Haley, Elvis or Cliff Richard.

MY Generation will probably be wanting to 'chill out' to 'Let's Go To San Francisco', 'Whiter Shade of Pale' and 'Jennifer Juniper'.

Give it another 20 years or so, and we're going to be having the 'Punk Generation' being looked after - can you just imagine them all belting out the Sex Pistols version of 'God Save The Queen' - while trying to 'crowd-surf' with their Zimmer Frames grin grin grin.