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AIBU

AIBU about other peoples visitors

(179 Posts)
Flakesdayout Sun 18-Oct-20 16:10:03

I was having a good day then saw that my neighbour has yet another person visiting. Yesterday she had two separate visitors. I understood that we cannot have people from another household into our homes as we are now in Tier 2. My friend is also planning to flout the rules. She is saying it is her support bubble. Yet I am doing as I am asked and have not been to visit my sons. I know we can visit in gardens but the weather isn't great. AIBU to be getting slightly p'd off with the blatant disregard for the guidance.

Cossy Mon 19-Oct-20 10:18:18

All you can do is look after yourself and avoid contact with your neighbour! She is wrong, but when this is all over you still have to live next door her, she’s a very silly, very selfish woman !

Dareyouto Mon 19-Oct-20 10:33:14

It’s obviously your decision what you decide to do but I have no intentions of spying on anybody. I refuse to live in fear and will not be treated as a puppet.
Imagine a virus so deadly you need a test to see if you have it.
Imagine a vaccine so safe and effective they have to threaten and force people to have it.
The survival rate is over 99.9%.
Covid 19 is a false pandemic created for political means.

Rosina Mon 19-Oct-20 10:33:38

If, at the beginning of the pandemic, every single person had stayed indoors and had no contact with others for at least fourteen days, the virus would have had nowhere to go, nobody to infect, and that would have been the end of it. Obviously, that could not have worked as there are sick people, food needed to be delivered etc. but it seems so clear to me that if we get as near to that ideal as possible then that is the way to defeat Covid. Why is that so hard to understand? I am with you Illte - sadly there are those who will risk all, and care little for others.

Craftycat Mon 19-Oct-20 10:36:22

I'm with GeeKesse.
Too many people curtain twitching.
As long as you do what YOU know to be right then stop worrying about other people.
Your neighbours having friends in their houses are not going to endanger you so let them get on with it. I am sure they keep their distance when they get together.
I am going out for coffee today with a friend- she will pick me up in her large car & I will sit in the back with a mask on & the windows open. We take her car as it is bigger than mine.
The coffee shop has distanced their tables.
I am sure there are people who think this is all wrong but I don't feel at all threatened.

Rosina Mon 19-Oct-20 10:37:04

Have just read your post Dareyouto and have also read others who share your feelings. Would you please explain? I can't grasp how a false pandemic can kill so many, nor what the purpose is of governments wrecking their own economies, and I would like you to enlarge upon this as I just don't get it.

NemosMum Mon 19-Oct-20 10:41:21

Some research published last week indicated that >80% people had knowingly contravened the 'rules', but most justified it on the grounds that they were 'careful' and didn't put anyone at risk. A further group had unknowingly contravened the 'rules'. That leaves a very small number of very frightened people pretty much stuck at home. Stop worrying and leave other people to get on with their lives and you get on with yours according to how much your perceived risk is. You will be much happier!

Nanna58 Mon 19-Oct-20 10:42:52

We could call any non- compliance ‘ the Andy Burnham effect’ ! On the radio today Alok Sharma was asked why people should comply when Burnham wasn’t! I am , but it’s a right old mess

4allweknow Mon 19-Oct-20 10:46:15

Came out to get into car. Looked across road to see 5 cars parked around a house opposite. Household has two adults 5 children. The additional 3 cars would be unlikely have only one occupant. Saying two each that adds 6 to a household of 7. Knowing the family and their ethnicity more likely there were at least 3 in each visitor car. This has been going on for months. Originally I made a comments across the road " you seem to have a lot of visitors". The reply "oh I know, just can't stop them coming". Obviously don't know the word NO. And some folk wonder why we can't get on top of the virus.

Brigidsdaughter Mon 19-Oct-20 10:46:33

Illte I'm with you on staying safe regardless of the rules

Marydoll Mon 19-Oct-20 10:49:33

Dareyouto apparently that survival rate came from US figures, was shared on Facebook and is now thought to be totally false.
There are no exact figures of survival rates at present. Could you please quote your source?

Do you personally know anyone who has had it and died? I do, and certainly don't agree with you.

NannyDaft Mon 19-Oct-20 10:54:35

Yes I agree plenty of people interpret the”rules” to suit themselves . But it is hard to accept that you can are “allowed to go any outside plat area and be with totally strangers but you are breaking the law if you have 7 in your party - even when three of the party are only 3 and 4. That is when it hurts !

Purpledreamer Mon 19-Oct-20 10:55:47

Oh, that is so irritating when you stick to the rules and see others blatantly flouting them. But as others have said, it does no good to fret about it, however aggravating it is. Keep doing what you're doing, you're keeping yourself and those you care about safer.

Grandmabatty Mon 19-Oct-20 10:57:14

Marydoll, I think you should rename yourself Miss Marple! ☺

TillyWhiz Mon 19-Oct-20 10:57:16

It's sad that people are not prepared to comply to get us through it as soon as possible. My daughter is having chemo so is very vulnerable, I am in her bubble so I distance myself from others. I am in Tier 1 but am only prepared myself to meet 1 person in what I consider a safe place or go to places I personally consider safe. No-one else has been in my house since March. I have nothing to do with anyone who is breaking the rules, I can't afford to. I have a daughter to protect.

Rosalyn69 Mon 19-Oct-20 10:58:54

I really don’t subscribe to all this curtain twitching. There’s something just not nice about it even dressed up as being “a good citizen”.

CarlyD7 Mon 19-Oct-20 10:59:58

Lots of people I know aren't planning to obey the rules (which irritates me because I get very uncomfortable breaking rules) so I think this new 3 tier approach will be pointless. Far better to have a 2 week nationwide "fire break" and then we all know where we are. We may well have to have another one in December (maybe the first few weeks) and another in January or February, but at least it will apply to everyone and the rules will be clear.

Marydoll Mon 19-Oct-20 11:02:50

Grandmabatty

*Marydoll*, I think you should rename yourself Miss Marple! ☺

I like to thinks so!! However, I would prefer to be called, Sherlock, more cerebral. wink

I have a very enquiring mind or perhaps, just plain nosy!

Chardy Mon 19-Oct-20 11:03:26

Accusing people of being curtain-twitchers is pretty offensive.

Hellsbelles Mon 19-Oct-20 11:07:44

My 84 year old mil ( lives in a tier 2 area ) has since Friday , been to someone's house, then shared a car journey . Saturday took another friend out to a pub for a meal , they wasn't asked for details or if they were of same household. Is going to her hairdressers house for a cut later in the week, and fully intends to still meet her friend to go shopping.
To be quite honest , I've given up on caring if she catches it.

Nannapat1 Mon 19-Oct-20 11:09:00

I wouldn't waste your energy on getting angry,especially if your are not directly affected. For starters you do no know (I am assuming) the exact reason for her visitors: not all are social calls, they may be providing a service. Secondly, the 'rules' are currently changing constantly and rapidly, which can both confuse and annoy. Opinion varies as to whether or not they are effective. Personally I concentrate on keeping me and my as family safe as I can within the constraints of needing to carry on our daily lives.

Alexa Mon 19-Oct-20 11:20:34

"Accusing people of being curtain-twitchers is pretty offensive."

Disapproval connotation is all of the meaning. I like neighbours to keep a look out for me and take an interest in what I am doing. If neighbours for any reason disapprove of what I do this also matters to me and I'd think again.

Twig14 Mon 19-Oct-20 11:21:19

My sister n her husband flaunted the rules took my elderly mother to restaurants/ shops/ garden centre for Christmas decorations and to the Trafford Centre shopping mall. Thought I was being over the top not going here there n everywhere. He has now been diagnosed positive with Covid and is quite ill and as my sister n mother in the same household I fear that they too are at great risk of getting it. This virus isn’t good so many including my own father n two good friends died of it. You don’t dance with the devil

Canklekitten Mon 19-Oct-20 11:22:54

Those who are vulnerable and have underlying health issues should stay indoors. Everyone else just get on with life.

In my opinion there will be more priblems such as mental health issues and suicides than deaths due to covid. Why oh why can't the government see this????

CleoPanda Mon 19-Oct-20 11:37:35

“Quote Canklekitten Mon 19-Oct-20 10:03:32
Trouble is people have lost all respect for the government. I will follow rules when they make sense, but right now I follow my own rules and like your neighbour if I want to have friends round I will. Of course I make sure we all keep our distance and wash hands etc but I am not locking myself away. Trust me, the government's rules will change again as they can't make their minds up!
So many nosey neighbours, twitching behind their curtains. To be honest makes me sick!!”
I am totally horrified by your post.
It is frankly unbelievable that you dare to post these things.
Having been very ill myself in May and just last week lost my beloved mother in law to COVID-19 , I am appalled at your behaviour, lack of empathy and frankly abhorrent behaviour.
To everyone else, Sorry about the rant but my feelings on this are extremely raw. Stupidity, selfishness, inability to comply with simple no contact rules will continue to drive this vile pandemic for another year.

Marydoll Mon 19-Oct-20 11:41:05

CleoPanda ?

As a shielder, I too was horrified at this post! I have been sitting trying to formulate a measured reply, but I would probably be banned from the site, so I will leave commenting until I calm down.