Mum won’t listen to advice AIBU?

Harmonypuss wrote:

"Basically, I think that if someone who is allegedly 'vulnerable' to the virus by virtue of age or pre-existing health condition, should be asked by their friends and family what they want to do, whether they are prepared to accept the risks, then if other family members are conscious of the possible transmission of virus across ALL the people they come into contact with, then decisions should be made by all concerned and if one person doesn't like to arrangements then they don't have to get involved in them."

Harmonypuss, are you also aware of your duty as a member of society not to become a drain on the health service?

I don’t know why the balance changes as we get older. In my case my daughter is telling me the lockdown restrictions are ridiculous and why shouldn’t people visit their families if it makes them feel better.I totally disagree but we have to agree to differ.She is an adult and I won’t tell her what to do, but she speaks to me as if I am a silly child believing the “ scaremongering media”

I have reminded her it’s not about choosing to get the virus , it’s about safeguarding hospitals.

nellgwynne

I think lots of us have this frustration. I think that basically, if elderly relatives are of sound mind, they should be allowed to make their own decisions. There's no point making ourselves miserable over it. Give the advice once, and then let them get on with it. I may sound hard, but they are adults.

Even if they are not "sound of mind" they are still autonomous beings and should be allowed to make their own decisions unless it can be shown that they are doing something detremental to their own well being.

If you are sound of mind you are allowed to choose to do something that is detremental to your own well being. It's a conundrum, but where our older realatives are now we will be soon enough.

Atqui

I don’t know why the balance changes as we get older. In my case my daughter is telling me the lockdown restrictions are ridiculous and why shouldn’t people visit their families if it makes them feel better.I totally disagree but we have to agree to differ.She is an adult and I won’t tell her what to do, but she speaks to me as if I am a silly child believing the “ scaremongering media”

That's the "walking on eggshells when talking to our adult children" conversation. I haven't got a friend who hasn't been there.

Atqui, maybe it is because older people are generally not as well educated as younger people. Unless older people have been taught in their youth to view the wider issues they will not deal well with culture shocks.

That’s a bit of a sweeping statement Alexa!

Atqui, I did say "generally". Education is generally better than it was when I was a nipper.

Yes of course far more people go to university and higher education than when we were young, but most of my friends read up on current affairs and opinions , and not just social media .

Atqui, I don't doubt it. I notice that people of like minds and backgrounds form socialising groups. I notice this on Facebook where all my friends and acquaintances are politically left wing and all their friends and acquaintances are likewise turtles all the way down apparently.