Birthday flowers

I must be ungrateful also as my children always ask what I want but my eldest son never buys anything off of the list and what he buys I always give to charity shop , I never ask for much a book a certain scented candle or bubble bath just one item each but he will get things like bath bombs,funny flavoured gin (I like normal Gordon's gin) so I agree with OP not ungrateful we just want our children to put more thought into our gifts as we do for them

I think I would suggest not giving or receiving birthday gifts any longer.
You feel, and I understand why, that your children are just sending either flowers or chocolates in order to have sent something. I presume they know, you don't like cut flowers, so it seems inconsiderate of them to send them.

I would kindly tell them to stop as it does not sound as if either you or they are getting any pleasure out of continuing this tradition.

I’m not keen on cut flowers either but they and the chocs would still be gratefully, and graciously, received. As others have said, it’s difficult to buy much else at the moment other than lining the pocket of Jeff Bezos even more than we do already!

Yup, it does sound ungrateful. At least they all remembered your birthday and sent you something - or are you so materialistic that you only value gifts that you perceive to be of value (monetary) and not the fact that you were remembered at all ? Think about WHY you are feeling so ungrateful - it good be all about you and not about them at all ! Let's hope you manage to smile again soon - send the chocolates and flowers to someone who needs them then if you don't ! There's always the option to make someone else 's day - give it a try - we all love surprise 'no reason' gifts don't we. Why not find yourself a face or body cream that you really like (and can easily buy online at the moment) and mention it to your family - saying that you do love it but wouldn't dream of buying it for yourself ! Hints can be helpful you know !

Perfectly written and sums it up completely

Wasnt this posted other day?-or something very similar? Yes you are ungrateful.

I adore flowers and am absolutely over the moon with them always. I have a huge fear issue with candles though and in the last few years I must have received 19/20 especially at Christmas!! Some people know of this, but seem to forget. I'm not offended they forget, and these have all gone to good homes - charity shops, raffle prizes, my DD or friends, (not the ones who gave me them!!).

I send flowers to family or friends on a random basis each month because I like to think they bring a smile , especially when they aren’t for any special reason, just to let people know that I’m thinking of them during these strange times. Without fail they have been happily received and have led to conversations with those I haven’t been able to see for a while. If you don’t like flowers or chocolates then surely you should just tell your family that, whilst it’s lovely that they have remembered you on your birthday, maybe in future they would donate the money instead because that’s what you would prefer. At least you wouldn’t sound ungrateful then.

I'm a bit with OP here, on the basis that cut flowers are very expensive to send and last such a short time, but are probably a fairly easy option for someone with a very busy life. I'm sure the AC are thinking of you, even if they don't have lots of time to spend trying to think what you might like. My DS has quite often sent flowers, and I've dropped a couple of hints that a book might be more appropriate - I have to remember to add things to my wish list with a famous internet bookseller (and seller of so many other things, even if we prefer not to support them...), which makes it easier for him. Flowers are nice for mothers' day, though, and he excelled last year with a potted azalea that was glorious for ages, and is actually flowering again now!

It is so difficult to choose gifts for people at the moment, specially if you're not seeing them; be grateful they thought about you, and give the gifts to someone with no family if you dislike them so much.

Getting a present on your birthday shows that somebody has thought of you and that is a reason to feel happy. Unwanted gifts can be stored and given to charity shops. Chocolates can be passed on when the lockdown finishes if you really don't want them. Or, you can send them to me!

I've had an absolute nightmare trying to buy gifts this year. Usually I go for a small thoughtful gift that reflects the recipient. This year it's been all online and cost twice as much with postage. Flowers by post cost the earth! Im sorry you are disappointed. Personally I'm happy with a card and a phone call.

I have been buying my mother monthly flowers for both Christmas and birthdays recently. When asked by another family member what she wanted in their unsecured Santa gift pool this year, she opted for monthly flowers on the fortnights in between my dates! It's all expensive but great to know she has something she appreciates.

Personally I would be delighted with flowers as it means they ve thought about me and made sure I ve had something special on my birthday xx

I can't think of anything more uplifting or cheering than being sent a beautiful bouquet. I cannot understand anybody not being delighted. Maybe some people would be happier getting nothing at all on their birthday from their children. See how that feels. I've been there and I can assure them it hurts. And it really does prove that it's the thought that counts.

I would be thrilled with flowers and chocolates...
My son, particularly, buys me 'original' gifts but some of them are a bit odd! Lol.
Tbh, I don't care and love them because I love him. I know folk who have lost children and I consider myself fortunate to have a son who is a fine, strong young father and a lovely, daughter, for that matter too. They could give me anything and I'd be blessed.

Lovely, caring daughter*

well a lot of comments here,

me? I just love to receive flowers, preferring not cut flowers normally, well they don`t last too long do they?

but the way things are now,, well I just feel so warmed that anyone has remembered me,, usually my family,, but I would love to send more flowers to others of my friends, but I fear they may feel that I have gone ott, and would feel the need to respond similarly,, so sad

When is a post about flowers not about flowers? When does a poster who admits she knows it sounds ungrateful not need to be told circa 200 times that she is indeed ungrateful and ought not to be?

When is a post on GN about someone reaching out to others and hoping for a bit of empathy because they are feeling sad a post inviting people to constantly insult her integrity?

Come on people, be kind, it doesn't hurt, honest.

When there are people who simply get forgotten every year on their birthday and Christmas, I think you are lucky to get presents! We often think we know peoples motives but we can never read another persons thoughts, so try not to judge. They remember you on special days, and they spend money on you so look for the love and assume that their attentions are loving.

HomeAgain123 says that despite her daughter knowing she doesn't like cut flowers, she received three bouquets for her birthday, and that it's happened before. Sorry but I'd be seriously disappointed too!

We do need to let them know what we would appreciate though, my preferences are always hand cream, red wine or gin, depending on the giver's budget.
I really don't want flowers or chocolates either, or anything that gathers dust!

For Christmas I received some craft gin, a bottle of wine, some lovely Liz Earle handcream and some Ted Baker handwash, handcream and room spray.
Luxurious brands I wouldn't have bought myself, so a real treat and a pleasure to use ?

i once had a gift of a heavy and bulky flower pot. just before moving home so it was very difficult to move as over 200 miles away. i would have preferred nothing or chocolates . the worst part was having to say thankyou for something that was so difficult to move- took up a lot of space in the car!

Do all AC know OP dislike flowers?
Could it be a communication problem and Ac dont really know how much she dislikes them?

Why do some posters have to be so mean and sarcastic? The OP is not feeling sorry for herself she is just staying a preference. I totally understand not wanting flowers from everyone. I too, prefer to see flowers growing outside.For my sisters birthday I sent her a jar of apricot and vanilla jam, a book, an aromatherapy mist spray and a box of french biscuits. All from Amazon, and received next day. She was delighted as I had at least shown a little thought !

They say its the thought that counts but sometimes it is obvious that there has been no thought. It is easy to buy gifts online at the moment and have them delivered as I have done and they have been much appreciated. Flowers and chocolates are the easy way out and if you have ordered for delivery from a florist you don’t know there can be a lot of greenery and little flowers.