My DH is 60 and I am 61 and we seem to have hit a point where we feel that life really doesn’t have much left to offer us.
I have been disabled with a back problem for the last 20 years, and find it difficult to stand, sit or walk for more than a few minutes without suffering severe pain, which means that I have to spend a lot of time stuck in bed, but up until recently I felt that I had been able to handle life with my disability pretty well all in all. Always telling myself that there is someone worse off than me, and continuing to do a little bit of DIY, gardening, crafting etc, as and when I have a couple of hours where the pain isn’t so bad.
We did our big 'Escape to the Country' about 5 years ago, something which we had both dreamed of for many years, and moved about 200 miles from family, seeing it as a last big adventure before we got old, but sadly since then, my health problems have got worse, and my husband who was fit and well when we moved here, now needs a double hip replacement, and suffers with arthritis in his knees. When we moved here, we visualised lovely trips out in the countryside, maybe stopping for a drink and pub lunch while we were out, and nice strolls by the sea, which is not too far away by car (I have a mobility scooter), but in reality it hasn’t worked out this way. 1. because I’ve developed car sickness, and 2 due to my husbands leg and hip problems. However, we do love the area we live in and are very happy in each other’s company. We have no major money worries, but it seems our health has really put a halt to our enjoyment of life.
My family were very unhappy about our moving away at the time, and made things very difficult for the first 3 years, but have since come to terms with things, although they have made it clear that they would be very pleased if we were to move back, so that it’s not such a long journey if there were an emergency. We would quite like to move back now, as life hasn’t turned out the way we had hoped, and it would be nice to have family closer, but there is still quite a lot of work that needs doing to make the house saleable, and now that we’re both struggling, everything takes so long, that it seems like a massive mountain to climb, before we can even think about tackling another move. Plus with Covid, it doesn’t really matter where we are, as we’d still pretty much be living in isolation even if we were just a mile up the road.
We have therefore arrived at a point where neither of us can see a lot of point in life anymore, as it’s such a struggle just to get through every day. We feel we have nothing left to look forward to and yet in our early 60’s find it hard to accept that this is likely to be our life for the remaining time we have left. I know that in reality, compared to others we have very little to complain about, but wonder if anyone else has found themselves in the same situation, and if so, whether they’ve found a positive way to move forward in life, or whether we just have to accept that this is it.
Sorry this is such a long one, but I wanted to try and give as clear a picture as possible of the situation.
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