to think that my DIL uses too many cleaning products?

I think some aerosol products can damage the atmosphere. Could you discuss this with your daughter in a non-challenging way? Such as a general talk about how important climate change has become and then gradually add in some things about sprays etc?

flopen you are right to worry. It has been proved that cleaning products and air fresheners contain substances which are harmful to lungs. It is not just outside air pollution, which causes a vast increase in poor lung health.
You can't rely on tory governments to take actions, like banning harmful additives, they are always more concerned about protecting their wealthy mates' finances than the health of ordinary citizens.

Oh dear, sticking the knife into the in law. It's nothing to do with you.

Sadly this really is none of your business. I can see that you are worried about your grandson. Unless you want to invest in a hamper of eco friendly luxury cleaning products for her as she so clearly likes cleaning (or is she just trying to impress you?) which you could present as a special treat. Having said that I would not have wanted my MIL to have given me anything like that . But then cleaning was not something I particularly relished as a young mum and I just did it because I had to.

you could ask what she uses and say has she tried "xxx" ? or buy her a gentle product and say you really like she is looking after the whole family but you have read somewhere that this new product may make her life easier.

I’m with you on this, flopen. All those chemicals are worse for all of us, and especially for little lungs, than a bit of dirt. There’s enough pollution in the air (witness the little London girl who died recently) without us adding to it. Give me vinegar any time - easily available online in five-litre containers.
But the real problem is how, or even if, to say it. I don’t know how...

If my not so DML had told me or given me cleaning products I would have told her to stick them somewhere painfully where the sun does not shine.
We all have our ways. You stand to alienate her.
When I was young I used to red Cardinal the step before she came and the chap next door remarked "Kit inspection again". It really made me think especially as her favourite trick was to stand on tiptoes and take her hand along the top of my doors. I stopped bothering told my husband and next time at her house when there was an accumulation of dust in the bedrooms he wrote I love you in it on the dressing table. She never did anything again on a visit.
Each to their own.

The only cleaning product I use is Detol clean and fresh multipurpose. It does everything from loo to floor shower to sink. Never ever use bleach....

RUDE !!!

My DIL is an eco friendly person. Her drains smell, toilet is stained and cooker has burnt on things. I wish she would use chemicals. She cleans but soap and water doesn't get rid of these things. I'd love to smuggle some bleach in ?

I agree with you actually. My son and DIL are very eco conscious and would never expose their baby to strong chemicals and bio disrupters in common cleaning stuff.

OP
Dont you also worry about your dil and son's damage due to those products?
Why only the gc?

You do have to watch what you say but having said that it's dangerous to mix cleaning products. I moved house my DD was a baby there was a stain the the bath. I tried the usual bath cleaner it didn't work. I used strong bleach and another cleaning product together. Straight away it omitted a gas like smoke I struggled to open the window turned the tap on and shut the door. Got my DD from her cot and went down stairs. It burnt my hands and caused an eye infection. I didn't know at the time mixing these cleaners was so dangerous.

I liked a clean house, my mil’s house was a s***hole, quite literally at times, with several elderly dogs and new puppies and horses tail bandages in the sink.

I never suggested she lived any differently and she never suggested anything of the kind to me.

And that is why we liked each other and were welcome in each other’s homes.

Cross that boundary - even with a gift- and you do so at your peril.

I use sprays as little as possible as I know they cause a reaction in my throat, causing coughing. I prefer the cream versions of some products which are available. If I do spray anything I usually open the window, then escape and close the door for a while.

I only offer my opinion if it is asked for (and I’m Mum not M-I-L).

No, keep quiet!

Don't take any cleaning products to her! She might think you are hinting that her house isn't clean enough! Keep well out of it. It's up to her own mother to tell her these things.

Just leave it...it’s none of your business

Yeah it's not uncommon for grandmas and mothers-in-law to only really care about the health of their grandchild, and not the health of their adult offspring or in-laws. It's under the guise of control. They don't really care about the health of the grandchild. It's a guise for minute control. Get over it, you cannot control what cleaning products she uses and how often. It's so petty.

I am a convert to everything natural and never once thought about how I was using chemicals around my family or my animals. I was invited along to an afternoon chat with a group of women and a lovely lady introduced us to doTerra oils. Witch Dr stuff my hubby would say. Well after listening and thought geez, I could try this stuff. My go to for cleaning is peppermint oil, vinegar and pure water. Love love love. My visitors always notice when they come into my house now and comment about the fresh smell. I now make all my DIY products, laundry detergent, dishwasher cleaner, shampoo, soap, you name it I make it. It actually works out cheaper than buying all the chemical stuff. We have terrible problems with the horse fly here. They truly bite and my animals hate them too. I make my own spray for them, all natural.
Suggestion flopen, have an afternoon tea or morning tea and invite a rep from an oil company to give a little chat. This way it isnt stepping on your DIL’s toes but offering an alternative, but please don’t tell her how to clean, it sure will be the worse thing you could say to your DILand friendship would be ruined. If you need more info, would only be too happy to assist you

Like others have said I would keep very quiet. Her home, her choice.

I think the giving of cleaning products ( natural or unnatural)? would be a stepping on toes matter ( how would you have felt about MIL rolling up and giving you house cleaning stuff?)
My own mother and Grandma were demons for the liberal sprinklings of Vim, Dettol and anything else that kept the place spotless.I survived.Even survived Grandad’s pipe smoking which was pretty constant.
Say nothing to your DIL is my advice, but if sprays affect you then tell her so and that alone may make her think about the subject.

How many of us who are horrified about cleaning spray have wood burning stoves and diesel cars for example? Not that I’m advocating any of them, but I suspect many of us may be polluters in some way which is detrimental to air quality. Glass houses and all that......

You could always let her know when you are coming over, so that you don't interrupt her cleaning, and don't have to watch her doing it. I wouldn't want visitors to arrive whilst I was cleaning the house - I prefer to do that before people arrive, so I can relax with them. I would feel that even more keenly if I thought that my housework would end up being discussed online.