Gransnet forums


Car cross over blocked with bin

(99 Posts)
Dilemma Wed 01-Sep-21 14:37:28

My neighbour and I have ajoining steep drives with a shared crossover and dropped kerb across both of them. My husband uses a wheelchair so I park on our front garden, parallel to the road, with the passenger door opening onto the level pavement to make transferring him safer and easier. The easiest way to park the car in this position is to cross the pavement at an angle, using "her" half of the dropped kerb.

My neighbour has called round some months ago to tell me not to drive on "her" property and to inquire if I have a driving licence(!). I explained about my husband and the wheelchair and that the crossover belonged to the council. She said she would check this with the council. Fast forward a few weeks and she now places a wheelie bin on the edge of the dropped kerb if she anticipates we might be going out.

Today, I was pleasantly surprised that there was no bin when we left to go out for lunch; as I was transferring my husband she arrived home, went inside and came out immediately with a bin. She stayed in the garden doing some dead-heading until I had manoeuvred onto the road. The bin was still there on our return but she will take it in before her son comes home this evening.

We are about to apply for planning permission for a sizeable extension so do not want to antagonise her further. I keep out of her way and record the times the bin is put out on non collection days. Council advice is that bins should only be on the pavement on collection days, so I may take it up with them after our planning permission is granted. Fortunately, we will not require a party wall agreement on her side.

AIBU to resent my neighbour making access to my property awkward?

MadeInYorkshire Sat 04-Sep-21 08:37:24


Thank you all for your moral support. In response to some of the issues raised, I am attaching a photo taken from our front window yesterday. The crossover is the pale strip parallel to the road between the dropped kerb and the black tarmac which is our drive. It is especially strengthened to allow for vehicles to pass over underground pipes and belongs to the council. I have never driven on next door's drive.
We do not need and would not qualify for a disabled space on the road as we have off road parking.
My husband has Lewy Body Dementia so cannot offer much support.
We only moved here late last year and, once extended, this house will be ideal for my husband's needs so we won't be moving again. I believe the people next door have lived there for around 30 years but our house was empty for 3-4 years before we moved in.

So in essence looking at the photo, the crossover belongs to the Council? Looks as though you don't even go near her bit at all?

Can I ask why you don't just drive in to your garden and park on the gravel with the wheelchair side on the tarmac so that you can easily manoeuvre the chair?

Dilemma Sat 04-Sep-21 17:31:48

The tarmac drive is very steep - about 1 in 7 - which would be quite dangerous for wheelchair transfers. Before we took out the hedge and built the stabilised gravel parking area ( which also slopes, but not so badly) I used to park on the road next to the crossover, transfer my husband & push him indoors, then go back out to park the car on the drive.
Having the passenger door open onto the level footpath works well.

mumofmadboys Sat 04-Sep-21 18:51:01

Say nothing and smile sweetly at your neighbour. She is behaving badly. Don't let it get to you. Be the bigger person.
We had a daft neighbour who used to put his recycling bag in our parking place when I went out to table tennis. This meant I had to stop the car, move the recycling to the side and park the car in our allocated space. I never said a word. Life is too short! He has now moved thankfully!

Pammie1 Thu 07-Oct-21 22:12:08

From the photographs and your description, it sounds very similar to our own property - what you describe as the ‘cross over’ is actually a reinforced strip in between the dropped kerb and our drive. This belongs to the council and you’re not doing anything wrong unless you’re blocking access to your neighbour’s drive. I’m with others here in that I wouldn’t do or say too much until your planning permission has been granted. After that I would report the bin placement on non-collection days to the council. I would also make her aware that by continuing with this behaviour she is deliberately interfering with your husbands’ care, and that if it doesn’t stop you will report her to the appropriate authorities for harassment of a disabled person. What kind of person does this when it must be patently obvious that life is difficult enough for you. Shame on her.

Floradora9 Fri 08-Oct-21 21:48:36

On the subject of bins on the pavement our able bodied neighbours leave all their bins on the pavement they are never put away . We live in a small cul de sac so most people walk on the road . If I can see their bins from our living room I move them but they have lots of CCTV and will see me do it. I only once put a bin in their garden and they came home and moved it. Their problem is loads of stuff filling up their drive and it looks terrible.

Ali08 Fri 15-Oct-21 18:47:10

Has this been resolved yet?
Could you accidentally-on-purpose bump her bin out of the way when entering/leaving your property?
Wouldn't it be nice if someone stole it!! ??
I'd have a word with her son, see if he can be helpful in sorting out his mothers pettiness!

Dilemma Sun 17-Oct-21 16:58:01

Not yet resolved - planning application submitted and final date for neighbour's comments is October 31st, with a decision anticipated by November 25th.
No comments to date, so fingers crossed for another fortnight. After PP is obtained, I will have a word with the son as I don't think he is aware of what his mother does. He had a week off work recently and no bins were left out on the wrong days.

biglouis Tue 26-Oct-21 23:33:53

By repeatedly behaving as she has your neighbour is harassing you. When you have got your planning permission and the extension is built I would get a solicitor to hit her with a suitable letter and scare the pants off her. In the meantime I would give your work people leave to be as noisy as they wish and to park their vans/vehicles/skip wherever convenient. Give your NDN some of her own medicine back.

Ali08 Thu 28-Oct-21 05:17:05

I'd have to glue her wheels, so as to stop them turning easily. Then she would have to drag the bin in & out.
Otherwise, I totally agree with Silverbridge, about visually impaired people as well as others in wheelchairs & disability scooters, also parents with pushchairs!!
The pic you have provided, Dilemma, is nothing at all like how I was imagining your driveway!
Tbh, I am surprised other neighbours have not complained about her bin, seeing as how smart an area it looks to be being blighted by an ugly bin!!

Ali08 Thu 28-Oct-21 05:17:55

Also, Dilemma, could you not come in via the rear of your property?

Dilemma Tue 16-Nov-21 17:05:36

Planning permission confirmed today with no objections from any neighbours. No bin on crossover since last Wednesday when I took a photo from across the road, rather than through my window, as it was a gloomy morning. My neighbour came out and said she had reported my driving to the council, who said it was a police matter. I said that I was collecting evidence, also on council advice, with timed & dated photos.
Since then, there have been no bins except on the correct day.
I just hope this is the end of it.

Shandy57 Tue 16-Nov-21 17:16:48

Sending positive thoughts that this is the end of it Dilemma. The woman obviously has mental health issues and no compassion at all for other human beings.

JaneJudge Tue 16-Nov-21 17:18:51

she sounds difficult to live next door to sad

Calendargirl Tue 16-Nov-21 17:46:52

Hope it is resolved for you.

Dilemma Wed 01-Dec-21 20:04:00

Final post (I hope).
No bins out for three weeks now. I will speak to her son if she starts up again, otherwise do nothing until the builders start next year, when I will instruct them to park outside her house (but not block the crossover) and make as much noise as possible!

Kamiso Wed 01-Dec-21 21:40:16

Probably the first time builders have been asked to make as much noise as possible.

MayBeMaw Wed 01-Dec-21 21:53:38


Final post (I hope).
No bins out for three weeks now. I will speak to her son if she starts up again, otherwise do nothing until the builders start next year, when I will instruct them to park outside her house (but not block the crossover) and make as much noise as possible!

When did two wrongs make a right?

aggie Wed 01-Dec-21 22:04:35

If the problem has stopped why turn up the agro again ? Just keep yourself away from the neighbour and leave her in peace . I know she has been horrible , but it’s over , don’t go down to her level

Elegran Wed 01-Dec-21 22:20:37


i don't quite understand the situation.
why can't you just drive up straight onto your tarmac and unload there.

Unless she backed in, her husband would be on the wrong (passenger) side then and the wheelchair would have to be parked on the neighbour's drive while he was transferred. That wouldn't go down well with the neighbour - she would probably put the wheeliebin in exactly themost inconvenient position. The slope of the drive may be wrong, too. wheelchairs don't stay in place on a slope.
In any case, she shouldn't need to do any different manoeuvres. The crossover strip is for her benefit as well as next doors.

Esspee Wed 01-Dec-21 23:37:14

Thank you for getting back to us. Please do nothing to deliberately antagonise her.
Your workmen should park outside your house and be respectful of neighbours.

Dilemma Thu 02-Dec-21 16:23:37

OK - I won't tell the builders to be noisy, but I think they will need to park outside both houses if they have multiple vehicles; there is usually something parked outside our adjoined neighbour who runs a garden maintenance business from home and has two adult children with cars still living at home.

eazybee Thu 02-Dec-21 18:10:31

Well, go next door just before the builders start work and tell her what will be happening, and say you hope their vehicles will not cause any inconvenience.
That is being a good neighbour.

Hetty58 Thu 02-Dec-21 19:20:02

I have a neighbour with five cars - and his son has a van. There's parking for two on his drive, with one more space outside - but on the street, not across his drive.

Obviously, as the two on his drive are 'hobby projects' so are there permanently, he sometimes has trouble finding a space. He leaves bins and recycling boxes on the street space to reserve it for himself - yet anyone can park in the road.

If I have several visitors, sometimes we can't find an extra space. Then, my son just moves all the bins onto the pavement.