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Things I learnt too late in life

(102 Posts)
Sallywally1 Sun 07-Nov-21 17:02:35

Thread on mums net. Thought it might be interesting on here too! Any pearls?

Alioop Mon 08-Nov-21 12:31:13

Appreciate what you have got.
That you are very capable and can manage life alone.
You are brave enough to leave relationships sooner that are toxic and don't waste years hoping people will change, even though they promise you they will.

Ydoc Mon 08-Nov-21 12:37:15

Go with youre instincts, and dont get married.

HillyN Mon 08-Nov-21 12:44:58

In my teens I was not fat and was actually quite attractive!

Shandy57 Mon 08-Nov-21 12:46:27

That looking after your teeth is so important, as your smile is the only part of you that doesn't age.

Jaffacake2 Mon 08-Nov-21 12:47:16

You are parent to your children and not their friend.Wish I had realised this through difficult teenage years with them and stood my ground without feeling sad about it.

Crystal46 Mon 08-Nov-21 12:57:21

MercuryQueen

That just b/c someone claims to love you doesn't mean they do. If someone loves you, it should feel that way.

Intention does not negate impact.

Family should treat you better than others, not worse.

Forgiveness does not equal reconciliation.

It's better to focus on what you have vs what you don't.

Other people's expectations do not equal your obligations.

'No' is a full sentence.

Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

'Respect' and 'obey' are two completely different things.

You can't be everything to everyone. You won't be liked by everyone. But that's okay, b/c you don't like everyone anyway.

Listen to your gut.

?Right on, MercuryQueen!?

Jaxie Mon 08-Nov-21 13:04:25

Never look down on anyone unless you’re helping them up. I find this very difficult to put into practice!

Naninka Mon 08-Nov-21 13:24:41

HillyN

In my teens I was not fat and was actually quite attractive!

Same... but I wouldn't have believed it back then. x

icanhandthemback Mon 08-Nov-21 13:26:58

Resolution is better than point scoring and makes you happier.
Asking a stupid question is better than making a stupid mistake.

Gardner Mon 08-Nov-21 13:32:57

Be Kind,
Don’t judge anyone until you’ve walked in their shoes.
Be kind .

Quaver22 Mon 08-Nov-21 13:33:51

If you are unhappy with your life and could change things for the better then act and don’t waste precious years.

Gardner Mon 08-Nov-21 13:34:15

I do love and agree with
Listen to your gut !

Sharina Mon 08-Nov-21 13:34:40

I’m not sufficiently qualified to deal with mental health issues. I can’t help people who will not help themselves. And some one else’s mental health issues should not affect my mental health.
Avoid religious people.
Teach your children with love, not fear. Enduring a child’s bad behaviour is crazy. So is over discipline.
Marry an orphan.
Treat your own daughters and sons in law with affection and love.
Above all, be kind.

grandtanteJE65 Mon 08-Nov-21 13:37:39

Don't accept invitations or promise to do things because you feel you ought to. Do things because you want to.

If you don't want to, find a polite way of saying NO and stick to it!

"I am sorry, but I am too busy right now" usually works.

Dee1012 Mon 08-Nov-21 13:39:50

Always be wary of those who constantly say "it was someone else's fault".
Focus on what you need, not what you want.

Neilspurgeon0 Mon 08-Nov-21 13:57:00

Oh my dear bbBevan how very right you are. I share your sadness at my own stupid inability to tell her.

Sheilasue Mon 08-Nov-21 14:02:30

You can pick your friends but can’t pick your family. Don’t judge a book by its cover.

polly123 Mon 08-Nov-21 14:03:11

Trust your gut feeling almost always.

sodapop Mon 08-Nov-21 14:07:13

grandtanteJE65

Don't accept invitations or promise to do things because you feel you ought to. Do things because you want to.

If you don't want to, find a polite way of saying NO and stick to it!

"I am sorry, but I am too busy right now" usually works.

Absolutely agree with those points grandtante

SachaMac Mon 08-Nov-21 14:12:39

Don’t stress over the small stuff just enjoy everyday.

Keep in touch with old friends, I have just reunited with two old school friends and we are having some great times. We were all too busy with families working etc for so many years to get together.

Don’t diet when you don’t really need to, enjoy everything in moderation. Ive spent so much money at Weight-watchers and Slimming World over the years and looking back I wasn’t even overweight just thought I needed to be ‘thinner’ so was on a diet all the time.

travelsafar Mon 08-Nov-21 14:14:52

Shandy57 i am with you on that one, teeth are so important as i have learnt too late to my cost. Mine have cost me hundreds not through neglect as i always have 2 yearly check ups, but in later years the items that are available to prevent decay are much better. When i was a young person all we had was a toothbrush and toothpaste. Now we floss, use mouthwash, and have dental cleaning done at the surgery.

Also trust your gut instinct. It was designed to mimic 'fight or flight' i believe, when centuries ago people used that feeling to survive.

Quilty Mon 08-Nov-21 14:15:21

School days are the best of days of your life!!!

Lilyflower Mon 08-Nov-21 14:49:10

Value your health while you have it. I have been sailing through retirement as fit as a fiddle with no thoughts of ill health whatsoever. Out of the blue, this year, I have been hit by two serious conditions and have had hospital stays for both. I am on a three month to a year recovery programme for an operation I had a couple of weeks ago. If you had told me this in January I'd have laughed.

Davida1968 Mon 08-Nov-21 14:49:36

Looks don't matter! But your good health - both mental & physical - does.

Peff68 Mon 08-Nov-21 15:37:40

MercuryQueen

That just b/c someone claims to love you doesn't mean they do. If someone loves you, it should feel that way.

Intention does not negate impact.

Family should treat you better than others, not worse.

Forgiveness does not equal reconciliation.

It's better to focus on what you have vs what you don't.

Other people's expectations do not equal your obligations.

'No' is a full sentence.

Don't set yourself on fire to keep others warm.

'Respect' and 'obey' are two completely different things.

You can't be everything to everyone. You won't be liked by everyone. But that's okay, b/c you don't like everyone anyway.

Listen to your gut.

These are genuinely awesome suggestions thank you ?