Leaving husband in 60s

notgran

DiscoDancer1975

Meer13511

Would this bother you ?
I had made some soup ; the recitpe called for a tin of plum tomatoes. DH goes past and says I should have used tin of chopped tomatoes. He is always telling me what I should/should not be doing. Should I just accept this ?

I’d be worried if my husband stopped doing this. Always make light of it though. I’m sure I irritate him too!

DiscoDancer1975 My thoughts exactly (I mean I must irritate my OH)

??I know what you meant.

Good luck Ydoc you have taken the first brave step now enjoy your life

Brave lady. You can now enjoy your new life.

Well done - but I don't think it's brave - just the logical thing to do. The 'brave and stupid' just stay in sad relationships and waste their lives.

I was 61 when my marriage of 35 years came to an end. I moved across the country and started my new life. It was difficult at first, but I joined a social group and had a great time. Met the love of my life when I was 64 and got married again a year later, and have been very happy since.
Go for it Ydoc - good for you. Enjoy your future. xx

Ydoc As others have said - a brave decision, but one that can lead you to many years of an enjoyable life. Hope you took time to get your plans in place and have somewhere nice to move into. Will be difficult these first few months - no doubt there will be people trying to persuade you to return. Stay strong.

I first started divorce proceedings on my 25th wedding anniversary. As my violent hubbie was seriously disabled, had everyone, (his Mum, Social services, etc.) on at me to change my mind. So I gave in - stupidly - and suffered a further five years, before he informed me he was upping and leaving.

I was in dire circumstances when that happened. Dreadful time, but I survived and moved forward. Have lived happily by myself for the past thirty years and have a wonderful relationship with my five adult children and eight g.children, all who have little to do with him.

I do, occasionally, feel a stab of envy when I see couples, but do not know exactly what goes on behind their closed doors, so that passes quickly.

Do come back and let us all know how your are doing - GOOD LUCK.

I knew I had to end my marriage when my baby daughter was born. It was a difficult time to make a decision but life was extremely miserable. I admit I kept it to myself I didn’t tell anyone my family knew things were not right but I left out a lot. It was the worse time of my life with a coercive controlling husband and no interest in our children. It was a struggle in every way but I got through it eventually. I did happily remarry and my life became so different there is no comparison.

You get one shot at this life it’s taken you a long time to make the decision to leave. There maybe aspects such as financial security that concern you but you will cope. The main thing is you are not living in the misery of your marriage you have left. That is what is most important you are now out of that life and you can make your own. I wish you well.

Well done for having the courage to move on to a better life for yourself ,quite a lot of people stay in an unhappy relationship and never take that step, enjoy your life and the peace you have found.

Hetty - but I don't think it's brave - just the logical thing to do.

It sounds like you've never had to do it yourself, Hetty, or you would know the courage it takes!!

Wishing you well for the future, Ydoc.

You are amazing. Have you somewhere safe to stay? Are you financially ok? Please go to a CAB for advice if you need info. And a solicitor re house/assets. There are wonderful brave women on Gransnet who have been down this path so keep in touch. Sixty two is the new thirty. Good luck.x

Congratulations Ydoc.
I hope you've found somewhere affordable and safe, and make new friends as well as keeping old ones!!
He may realise what he's lost and try to win you back, but that's a decision for another time and you could always choose to live separately, anyway!
I wish you the very best in your future. Stay safe but go forth and prosper, as Mr. Spock tells us all!!

Well done
I'm the same age and single would never be controlled or another by a man
I'm my own women who is enjoying the Auturm of my life peacefully
I wish you so much self happiness and calmness in your future

Well done Ydoc. Yes it's a brave thing to do, and you'll find the road quite rocky for a while, but be positive and enjoy the freedom!

Meer13511

Would this bother you ?
I had made some soup ; the recitpe called for a tin of plum tomatoes. DH goes past and says I should have used tin of chopped tomatoes. He is always telling me what I should/should not be doing. Should I just accept this ?

That’s grounds for divorce if ever I heard some.

Sparklefizz - oh yes I have (left first husband) - and leaving was a whole lot easier than staying!

Well done, a very brave thing to do. A leopard doesn’t change its spots. Enjoy the rest of your life.
I hope you have all the paper work in order and the support of your family.

Well done! That is very brave of you! You are ONLY 62 and you have plenty of dreams and wishes to go after. Do it! You won't regret it when you look in the rear view mirror in a few years time! Bravo!

Ydoc
Good for you.The hardest part, making the decision to leave, is done. Life can only get better.

I’ve done it in my 40s, not sure I would have had the confidence to do it in my 60s.

A massive well done to you! Take each day as it comes and you will feel better and strong each time. I wish you well for the future.

I left a wife beater after a long time and I don't know how or why I stayed there for so long. My life changed dramatically and I felt like he had stolen the best years of my life.

Best wishes xxx