Funeral party gatecrashers

I also wonder why you consider them close family based on DNA link, if you never met them

How about telling her they are welcome to the first part but not the restaurant? I know it is not what she wants.

Now your dilemma is - do you even want his niece there, knowing how she feels?

Just wonder why you felt you had to invite said niece, if it’s close family only? If you have never met her, it doesn’t sound like she could have been that close to your father.

I marvel at the nerve of people sometimes. To say she is bringing an uninvited couple, and then tell you to make sandwiches if it’s too expensive…..

?

Great minds think alike?
I think we are all of one mind on this!

Audi10

Charming reply to you! Says it all doesn’t it! Firstly sorry to hear of your fathers death, I would actually stick to my guns. And repeat politely and firmly the arrangements have already been made, there is no way I would entertain someone like that

Sorry Audi ... I've said almost the same as you, but I was writing as you posted!

Tell them that it's a seated meal and the restaurant knows how many places are set. She's no right to tell you what food to choose nor who to accept. Stick to your guns.

Charming reply to you! Says it all doesn’t it! Firstly sorry to hear of your fathers death, I would actually stick to my guns. And repeat politely and firmly the arrangements have already been made, there is no way I would entertain someone like that

Stand your ground
Say they can join you for coffee if you really must but reiterate that you booked lunch for x number of people and risk her taking the huff.
I thought you might be talking about something like this.
I held DH’s wake at the village pub, it was a Monday late morning and while they couldn’t close altogether on our behalf they were confident that we would have the place to ourselves. There were so many people there, some I had not seen for years so when I saw a couple at a table that I did not recognise I went up to them , welcomed them, thanked them for coming then discreetly tried to find out how they knew DH.” Oh we had just come in for a drink” they said! I smiled and retreated to my next brandy.
Honestly if you were in a pub and a load of people in black all came in together, wouldn’t you make yourself scarce? Not them, they stayed and D2’s MIL (who had early onset Alzheimer’s) chatted away to them as she didn’t know who anybody was anyway!