Gransnet forums


Should we be accepting these behaviours?

(223 Posts)
Sago Tue 24-Jan-23 13:15:15

So an adult male is dressing in a primary school uniform and loitering around the school gates and Police say this is harmless behaviour.

This is a step too far.

Have we been brainwashed into accepting this anti social behaviour?

Iam64 Tue 24-Jan-23 13:20:28

It seems as though attempts are underway to brainwash us Sago.
How do the police know it’s harmless? Have they had a forensic clinical psychologist undertake a history and detailed assessment?
In any event he may not pose a risk of paedophilia but it’s inappropriate behaviour. He should be told that and warned he may be in breach of the peace if he persists. Bonkers

Smileless2012 Tue 24-Jan-23 13:20:45

Yes it is a step too far and if the GCR Bill goes through in Scotland it may even be regarded as even more harmless. This man could identify as a woman after 'living as woman' for 3 months, obtain his certificate and be able to do a lot more than hang around a primary school in a girl's school uniformangry.

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 24-Jan-23 13:22:30

It’s unpleasant but what he’s doing doesn’t constitute criminal behaviour.

FannyCornforth Tue 24-Jan-23 13:27:32

Oh for crying out loud envy

FannyCornforth Tue 24-Jan-23 13:30:58

He’s at great risk of being attacked by vigilantes too

Oreo Tue 24-Jan-23 13:38:53

Regardless of what he chooses to wear, any man that hangs around near schools on a regular basis would be warned off by the Police. At least they would have been in the not so far off past. Men who turn up to watch schoolgirls need watching themselves as they could be a danger.

M0nica Tue 24-Jan-23 13:39:15

The problem is that it conflicts with what children are being taught at home and in school to help protect them from abuse, physical and sexual.

If this man wants to dress up in school uniform, yes, obviously he can. He can go out, walk around anywhere he likes, but if he has any common sense he must know that to dress up in the uniform of a local school and then walk close to those schools when the children are out and about, is likely to cause distress to parents and children and cause real concerns about the children's safety, even if it is misplaced.

Just because someone wants to dress as a school girl does not mean he can live his life as if nobody but hin and his preferences and desires matters.

The question I would ask is, how would the police and school respond were one of the maile teachers turn up for work dressed like this on a regular basis?

Oreo Tue 24-Jan-23 13:42:01

I think they could do that Monica if they say ‘they feel comfortable dressing as a woman’ it would probably make the school Head not want to take a stance for fear of pro trans anger.

MerylStreep Tue 24-Jan-23 13:45:48


He’s at great risk of being attacked by vigilantes too

It wouldn’t be the first time here in Southend 😉

FannyCornforth Tue 24-Jan-23 13:54:11

I’ve just remembered something.
At my school there was a semi-emergency meeting called for all staff.

We all met in the staff room and were all told that were to be aware of a man in a red van who was hanging around the school at home time, ‘watching the children.’

Some parents had alerted the head.

In the middle of the briefing, my friend suddenly shouted out,
‘That’s your David!’

It was indeed my DH, who was a builder, and who picked me up from school at the end of every day 🤦‍♀️

Sago Tue 24-Jan-23 13:59:47

It’s smacks of Jimmy Saville….hiding in plain sight.

FannyCornforth Tue 24-Jan-23 14:01:10

Yes, Sago, it absolutely 100% does.

Wyllow3 Tue 24-Jan-23 14:03:50

How do we know that the police have not made an assessment.

Kalu Tue 24-Jan-23 14:05:19

Not a problem with him dressing up but the bottom line is, this is not normal behaviour. It would have been termed, hanging around with menace when I and DDs were at school. Men like this were hounded and reported to the police who took these matters seriously.

Combining all the freedoms men are being allowed under a banner, are we just to sit and wait until the usual mantra, ‘lessons have been learned’ once proof arrives this is a backward step in safeguarding females/children? Also, what message does this send out to other males who fancy the thrill of blatantly watching innocent schoolchildren?

MerylStreep Tue 24-Jan-23 14:08:35

He’s must be bonkers to dress like that in the Milton Hall area.
There are a lot of hard men around there.

MerylStreep Tue 24-Jan-23 14:10:50


How do we know that the police have not made an assessment.

The police have spoken to him. Reported in our local paper.
They have assured everyone that he is no threat.
I prefer to make up my own mind on that assumption.

GrannyGravy13 Tue 24-Jan-23 14:12:52


He’s must be bonkers to dress like that in the Milton Hall area.
There are a lot of hard men around there.

Blimey MerylStreep this man must have a death wish.

If it’s not the parents at the primary school it will be the elder pupils at Belfairs who have a high chance of dealing with this themselves.

yggdrasil Tue 24-Jan-23 14:28:05

When I was at secondary school, there was a school janitor/caretaker. The first year girls had to do PE in just their knickers, shorts weren't allowed till year 2.
That janitor was always hanging around the first year PE yard, we all knew about it but nothing was ever done.

Iam64 Tue 24-Jan-23 14:32:27

I understand no crime has been committed but, I wouldn’t want him hanging round my grandchildren’s schools. Many a man with a sexual interest in children will find a way to be close to them. Grooming in plain sight?

M0nica Tue 24-Jan-23 15:04:04

Well, we have found out recently just how misogynistic the police are. Isn't this further evidence?

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 24-Jan-23 15:33:11

The police have spoken to him. If he hasn’t committed a crime and they don’t believe he has criminal intent they can only advise him that what is doing is unwise. I think the locals may take matters into their own hands.

MawtheMerrier Tue 24-Jan-23 16:30:30

It may not be criminal behaviour, but it is surely disturbing g and potentially far from harmless.
Man in stripey sweater wearing balaclava possibly with a sack over his shoulder bearing the word SWAG and lurking outside bank, or Bond St jewellers.
Similarly OK?
You might think the former is just a nutter(apologies for my non-PC language), but when it comes to children and “lurkers” I’d rather be safe than sorry.

Hithere Tue 24-Jan-23 16:37:07

A male around a school just because - red flag despite what he wears

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 24-Jan-23 16:37:30

I expect he is a nutter but what exactly are the police to do, having evidently spoken to him and satisfied themselves that he isn’t a threat? They can only act within the law. The locals will sort him out, I have no doubt.