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AIBU

To feel annoyance that D turns down bargain baby clothes

(78 Posts)
Pianokey Fri 04-Aug-23 14:15:45

My D and SIL are on a low income and have a four month old baby. They need more clothes for his age and I found a £20 bundle of 3-6 month clothes - nicely displayed so you could see all items, described as ‘nearly new’/‘new’ etc. 38 items in total. I offered to split the cost 50/50 (If I buy too many things for her I worry she will lose her sense of pride in providing for her baby). She replied that she didn’t like them so was not willing to buy them. I can’t believe she is so fussy! Other people receive hand me downs from family members with gratitude and are pleased to have any clothes, never mind ones they love. Why is she so fussy? Resisting the urge to tell her what I think as that would be disastrous! THeir car is on its last legs so we have had to insure my little car for her to drive so that we can all go on holiday together. There are so many ways she and SIL can save money but our relationship will suffer if I give her advice when it hasn’t been asked for.

biglouis Sun 13-Aug-23 14:02:23

As someone who deals in antiques (which is simply a posh way of describing second hand items which are over 100 years old) the attitude towards pre-used has changed massively even in the last few years. There is no longer any stigma about buying second user. Indeep many younger people are turning against fast fashion because of the resources it consumes.

This also applies to "brown" furniture because now many people are realising how sturdy and well made it is compared with mass produced rubbish.

However not everyone share these conservationalis views and there is also the element of taste. If a second user item does not appeal aesthetically then no amount of argument will make it so. Some mums just want "new" for their babies. I dont understand this because babies dont know what they are wearing but there is is!

alchemilla Tue 29-Aug-23 18:13:55

Well done OP for seeing the problem as pointed out by posters. I have a suspicion I'm in for this in the future - I know enough of my DS and wife not to buy first or second hand clothes with Disney, slogans, or pink/blue for girl/boy or anything synthetic but I'm sure it's still a minefield so I'm leaving them to it. They are great at hunting down bargains so I'll just give money.