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AIBU

Returning to the UK

(74 Posts)
angelbreeze Mon 15-Jan-24 16:27:50

In 2020 at the age of 72 the sale of my property and all my savings went towards the purchase of a property in France. My son said it was not possible to add my name to the title deeds, just himself and his wife, because it would mean forming a company which is costly. Altho I live with them on the property I am legally homeless. I receive a small pension and have always paid one-third towards expenses and new items for the property and gardens.. I have been told that there are many more expenses to come, ie pathways and pool area. Money is very tight for me right now so l asked my son if I could have some of my money back to help with decorating the old cottage on the property that I live in but he said no, he and his wife dont want to remortgage. I want to return to the UK as the relationship between myself and my son has broken down, he is rude and snappy with me. Can I get my money back? Im so unhappy here.

Joseann Tue 16-Jan-24 15:47:32

So, if money is needed to do up the pool area and driveways, does this mean that the son is operating a gîte business or similar? Once he gets going with visitors this coming season, angelbreeze could ask him for 1/3 of the letting revenue which is rightly hers?

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 16-Jan-24 16:46:51

Strange that the OP hasn’t returned after much support and helpful advice …

BlueBelle Tue 16-Jan-24 17:23:29

Yes I m wondering why too Gsm perhaps she feels she might be in danger if her gets wind of her talking to others on here or perhaps she just couldn’t bear to hear him called an abuser and talk of her being in an abusive relationship with him
I hope she does come back and put up minds at restaurants

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 16-Jan-24 17:27:54

Or it might not be true - something I always wonder when an OP doesn’t return despite having received support.

BlueBelle Tue 16-Jan-24 17:32:45

Indeed but I felt in my heart this was genuine
Let’s hope she comes back

BlueBelle Tue 16-Jan-24 17:34:03

Predictive text is sooooo funny I ve just realised in my post it changed rest to restaurant making no sense whatsoever 🤣

Germanshepherdsmum Tue 16-Jan-24 17:35:10

There is no reason not to return. She can do so and/or ask for the thread to be deleted.

Joseann Tue 16-Jan-24 17:40:02

BlueBelle

Indeed but I felt in my heart this was genuine
Let’s hope she comes back

I agree, I felt for once this was genuine - the complicated nature of property ownership in France, the mention of the old cottage (very common in rural France). That's why I wanted to offer support. She sounded distressed. I am still here to help, angelbreeze, as I am sure others are.
I will, however, be well pissed off if this is another of these wind ups, of which there seem to be many at the moment.

WonderfulLife Tue 16-Jan-24 20:30:34

I never said she did, I said that if she applied for care in a care home, they would want to know where the money from her house went so that would make her son a wee bit afraid as the government, council could take the money back from her son. This idea of mine was a ploy to make her son afraid that the UK government would be coming for his mothers money she had given him to pay for her care in a care home. This way she just might get some of the money back from her terrible son.

Labradora Sat 20-Jan-24 17:15:42

Hi Angelbreeze sorry you are having such a horrible time and are so unhappy.
There is always a way out one way or another so don't despair.
What proportion of the whole purchase cost of the whole property did your contribution represent ? Was it a third ? If it was any more than 1/3 , I have no idea why you are contributing a third of any additional capital expenditure at all.
You have said that money is tight I know but I agree with other contributors that it seems very likely that you will need legal advice.
Do you have any sympathetic bi-lingual friends who could help ?

BlueBelle Sat 20-Jan-24 17:23:33

Well 5 days now and no sign of Angelbreeze
Is angelbreeze ok ?
Has she regretted posting?
Has the son seen her post???
Or was it a wind up ?

Germanshepherdsmum Sat 20-Jan-24 17:24:26

We will probably never know.

petra Sat 20-Jan-24 17:25:10

The OP posted 5 days ago and hasn’t had the good manners to reply to all the good advice that posters have taken the time to reply to her.
Labradora
She’s not coming back to this thread.

Labradora Sat 20-Jan-24 17:32:20

Do we get a lot of wind-ups here ? I am a fairly recent recruit.
This poor lady has hopefully taken some of the excellent advice offerred and has taken legal or other advice. Sometimes just getting it off your chest and having others validate that your situation should not be happening to you is enough to start you on a course of action.

BlueBelle Sat 20-Jan-24 17:54:54

Petra if this is genuine, that’s harsh, the poster may be very upset, unwell or even not able to post

Joseann Sat 20-Jan-24 18:02:06

Welcome Labradora, do you have a dog by any chance?
You're right that maybe just getting it off her chest has helped this lady.
However, we do get a lot of threads, especially recently, asking for advice but no feedback or communication when we ask relevant questions to help us know what to suggest. Personally I think it is always polite to thank people for their time. We have GN members who are experts in many fields, or who can at least advise who to turn to.
This thread has several posters who have actually bought and sold properties in France, who understand the ropes, who are on French forums, who like me are no doubt fluent French speakers. It would be nice to know our suggestions are appreciated.

pascal30 Sat 20-Jan-24 18:04:37

BlueBelle

Petra if this is genuine, that’s harsh, the poster may be very upset, unwell or even not able to post

I did think this poster was genuine, and that maybe our replies were too painful for her to hear.. She really was in a horrible situation...

Joseann Sat 20-Jan-24 18:08:15

But equally we may have replies to help her out of the predicament if only she engaged and told us more. I think I counted 15 questions from posters on page one alone to take the discussion forward.

Germanshepherdsmum Sat 20-Jan-24 18:08:40

I feel you’re getting a bit emotionally involved, BlueBelle. As there was nothing to suggest that the poster was at risk of harm, I’m inclined to think that she was yet another OP who doesn’t have the good manners to return or it was a wind up.

BlueBelle Sat 20-Jan-24 18:11:03

There could be many explanations she could well be in an abusive situation
I feel concerned

BlueBelle Sat 20-Jan-24 18:12:30

No I m not over invested GSM just concerned
If this lady wasn’t genuine she’s very clever

pascal30 Sat 20-Jan-24 18:15:56

Joseann

But equally we may have replies to help her out of the predicament if only she engaged and told us more. I think I counted 15 questions from posters on page one alone to take the discussion forward.

I agree with you and think that all the responses given were helpful, but she had clearly been abused financially by her son and that is really difficult to hear I imagine..

Joseann Sat 20-Jan-24 18:22:01

Well my advice to her would then be to separate the emotional from the practical, and to take what she wants from either on this thread. Just let us know what would help, because if the gouv.fr website is no use to her, then I'll shut up quoting it!