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I d stay in the therapy you sound as if you definitely need it

Thank you Esmay.

Definitely not made up, I would have thought of something more comical if I wanted a laugh 🥺 thank you for your advice. I really appreciate it x

Hi ,
I have to admit that I wondered if your post was genuine .
Maybe , that's why there was such a knee jerk reaction to it .
At the moment
, your hormones are surging and now you are having doubts about your fiancé .
Spreadsheets make me worry that each time you need baby supplies-he'll be getting the calculator out .
And now ,
you're concerned about Tess . First she's there and then she isn't- I'd be worried as well .
The thing is we females have great inner radar .
I had doubts about a long term relationship and I was so right .
Now over the past decade : both my daughters have had exactly the same experience .

One other thing : my experience with dogs makes me extremely careful with Husky dogs and small children .

Take a deep breath and continue to consider what is best for you and your precious baby .

Wishing you the very best .
Esmay .

I would concur Scribbles.

I know. With how I was feeling. I didn't want "ltb" or "why are you having a baby" I just wanted constructive feedback. I might try mumsnet in the future. Ideally I don't want to post anywhere. I have loads of family and friends I could chat to but sometimes it's difficult speaking to people in real life with problems and strangers on the Internet seems appealing. I hate asking family / friends for advice and then constantly being asked about it afterwards. That's just me though.

Then you know what your problem is and how to deal with it. Do think about asking for help on Mumsnet too though - yes, it can be a bit of a nightmare over there at times, but it can also be a source of help and support too, especially from others in the same age and similar situations.

Allira

🤔

Try the relaxation classes.
They should really help.
Best if you can find one local to you so you can meet other young Mums-to-be.
It might help you to stop being so intense if you don't mind me saying.

Mumsnet is fine and they might have more in common with you.

No I agree. I can be intense. I sometimes look for the bad in every situation and I fixate on it. I have exercises to complete when I think like this and it really helps but sometimes when the overthinking is very intense I don't do these excercises and it really shows.

My husband didn't abuse me or cheat.. nothing bad like that. He generally just couldn't be arsed with lots of things and i was Included. He made time for all his hobbies, all his work overtime, seeing friends and family but quality time with me was always met with "I'm tierd", "I cant be arsed". We would go out for dinner and he would have nothing to talk to me about and then be rushing to get home to get to bed for an early rise for his morning hobbies. In the evenings he was sit on his computer playing games with my brother in law (or working) whilst I sat down stairs. I felt like a single person who lived with a male housemate who i shared a bed with.

In the end I left and it was a nasty divorce. I swore to never get married again after that. At every turn he could he was nasty. He didn't take accountability for anything and believed that no matter how unhappy you are, you just make it work as marriage is for life.

The final straw for me was when he was called as my emergency contacted from work, he didn't ask if i was okay or try and contact me... I was fine by the way, my work panicked a bit as the weather was horrendous and I was late. They told me they had called him. I was straight into my late meeting when I arrived then I forgot about it. Later that night I remembered they had called him and I asked why he didn't try reaching out to me to see if I was okay and asked if he was concerned? He said no. If you were in an accident I'm sure the police would have said. I know it doesn't sound like a big deal but he had a motorbike and I hated when he went to work on it. Even when things weren't great I still appreciated a "I've got to work" text. But when my work called as I hadn't showed wirh the weather, he couldn't even text me so say "are you okay".

I know it's tiny but it was the last thing in a line of many things over the years.

🤔

Try the relaxation classes.
They should really help.
Best if you can find one local to you so you can meet other young Mums-to-be.
It might help you to stop being so intense if you don't mind me saying.

Mumsnet is fine and they might have more in common with you.

Allira

www.baskingbabies.co.uk/pregnancy-relaxation-classes
Online as well as in person.

Cant tell if sarcastic or not. If not then thank you. I genuinely appreciate it.

I do overthink and am seeing a therapist about this and have been since July. Somedays my thoughts get too much and I just react emotionally without thinking or spraking.

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

www.baskingbabies.co.uk/pregnancy-relaxation-classes
Online as well as in person.

What a nasty, dismissive, judgemental run of comments. Like kids in the playground joining in with the initial bully. Whether the post is genuine (3rd post from this poster) or not maybe just scroll by rather than amuse yourselves with snide, unhelpful remarks. Kindness generally costs nothing, hate can cost lives.

Confusedfriend

I'm 33.

I didn't realise you'd been married previously.

You obviously had a bad experience but perhaps you overthink things.

Perhaps relaxation classes might help.

petra

I can’t be the only member thinking of flying handbags, can I 😱

Oh dear

We’ve been down this road before……

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Message deleted by Gransnet. Here's a link to our Talk guidelines.

Confused - Taking your latest post at face value, you have issues of trust with this man. You have been married and divorced in the past, and probably lack of trust stems from this which would be only natural ..... but you don't trust him and there seem to be reasons for this which stem from him.

Please don't commit yourself to moving in with him. As I suggested on your other thread, why not continue as you are in your own home?

I'm 33.

argymargy

The other thread explains that this poster is a young pregnant woman who has come to Gransnet because Mumsnet is too spicy.

The poster has not stated her age so may not be all that young - young enough to be pregnant, but she said both she and her current older boyfriend have both been married before. Her tone is that of teenager, but she may be well into her 30s.

petra

Confusedfriend

How are my two posts far fetched??

If you need explained, you do have a problem.

Exactly

Is Tess's second name Tickle, by any chance?

Jackanory time again.

YorkLady

petra

I can’t be the only member thinking of flying handbags, can I 😱

No! 🤣🤣🤣

We’ll soon know when Aunty and Uncle Tom cobbly and all are introduced to the story.

petra

I can’t be the only member thinking of flying handbags, can I 😱

No! 🤣🤣🤣