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AIBU

Nanny or Grandma

(193 Posts)
Sharr22 Tue 03-Dec-24 12:47:33

AIBU that as a new grandparents, who is refered to as Nanny by my kids and myself, my mother also wants to be called Nanny?

Back story she has 6 grand children already and 2 great grandchildren, from my children, her grandchildren
On a side note she also refers to my step dad of 53 years as 'Dad', not your dad so it sounds like we're sisters and he's our dad.

Rosiebee Wed 04-Dec-24 15:00:47

I'm a step grandmother and was very wary of stepping on anyone's toes although stepson's Mum was not on the scene so I opted for the Welsh Nain[ pronounced nine]. GC called me Nainee so I sign cards as 9E. My Christian name stars with a B so I often get 9EB. I just love being in the position of grandmother and would happily answer to anything.

Picklesgranma Wed 04-Dec-24 15:02:34

I am Mama to my youngest two GC and Grum to my eldest. I didn't want to be a granny so am happy with the choices

jocork Wed 04-Dec-24 15:03:33

I wanted to be Granny since other monikers had negative associations for me but my DiL's mum also wanted to be Granny. In the end we are both Granny. The GC distinguish by calling me Granny Bekah (my DD is their Auntie Bekah) and the other Granny, Granny Mac (Mac being what they call her husband for reasons unknown!) DD isn't sure she likes me being Granny Bekah but I think it's cute!
The children will probably change what they call us as time goes on as they are still quite young and have no concept of surnames yet, which is how I expect they may distinguish us later. I wouldn't worry about it though. The important thing is to show the children love and make sure they know who you are to them, whatever they choose to call you.

Chicklette Wed 04-Dec-24 15:09:19

My Mum could be difficult and likes to be the centre of attention. She insisted on being Nana. When my GS was born (her first GGC) she wanted to be Nana to him. We told her I was Nana. She didn’t want to be ‘great’ anything as it would make her sound old! We finally agreed on G-Nan, which I think I’ll be if I’m lucky enough to get to that stage. I’m Nana but my eldest GA used to call me Nanan as he didn’t talk well. Then I became Nana, but soon became Nan as he got older and cooler! I don’t really mind. It’s my relationship with the children that matters.

MissAdventure Wed 04-Dec-24 15:11:53

Luckily enough, some children are intelligent enough to know the difference between their family member, an animal, or that quaintly old fashioned phrase, "a paid help" wink

Hellsbelles Wed 04-Dec-24 15:20:00

Myself and the other grandmother are Nanny & Nana
Another suggestion is mum-mum ( Mums , mum ) I quite like that one.

dalrymple23 Wed 04-Dec-24 15:21:00

Agree with that -'nanny' is a nursemaid or female goat! My parents insisted that they were called Grandmamma and Grandpapa - a mouthful for a tiny! Paternal grandparents were Grumpy and Frumpy! Mine call me "Mrs D" - not quite got them to click heir heels yet!!!!

I also cannot understand why children are called "kids". Hate it. What is this comparison with goats?!!

Gummie Wed 04-Dec-24 15:37:56

Grandma70s

I’m Grandma, and the other one is Granny. She gave me first choice and I chose Grandma because I was close to my own grandma.

Nanny is a nursemaid (or a female goat!). I find its use for grandmother puzzling. It’s never been used by anybody in our family.

Same here. I'm Granny and my counterpart is Grandma. We agreed upfront and neither of us ever wanted to be a 'Nanny'. As far as we are concerned a Nanny is a paid professional who cares for other children.

Ticks me off when I pick them up from school and the teacher calls me Nanny. But I grin and bear it. That said my daughter called my mum Nanny.

JamesandJon33 Wed 04-Dec-24 15:48:53

At least the quaint old fashioned phrase ‘paid help’ is succinct.
No euphemisms

MaggsMcG Wed 04-Dec-24 16:21:56

26 years ago I decided on Nanny partially because I felt Grandma was too old for me. Now, at 72 I really wish I had chosen Grandma as it seems to receive a little more respect.
Back even in 1998 the word Nanny tended to be only used for a paid full time nursery/live in child minder. Now as more people seem to be able to afford this type of child care its not always associated with a Grand Mother.

Sennelier1 Wed 04-Dec-24 16:29:45

My siblings and I called our grandparents Meme en Pepe. (We are not in the UK) Our own children and their cousins called my parents Oma and Opa. When the first great-grandchildren were born my dad explained he would love to be called Pepe, like his dad. I said "I feel like a Pepe now". Of course all of us agreed. My mother decided she was much too young (2 years younger than our dad) to be a Meme and wanted to be called "Superoma". It never cought on 🤪

Grandma29 Wed 04-Dec-24 16:32:34

I’m know as Grandma which zi prefer. Nanny to me is a person who is paid to look after children!

grannybuy Wed 04-Dec-24 16:44:17

I’m granny. Everyone’s different, but that was my personal preference.

GrandmaHH Wed 04-Dec-24 16:50:47

I was Manga with my first grandson, don't know where it came from but remained until he could say Grandma. Always been Grandmas on my side of the family from year dot and I love it. Now am called Grandma by all the adults when the grandchildren are with us as so much easier .

MissAdventure Wed 04-Dec-24 16:51:28

JamesandJon33

At least the quaint old fashioned phrase ‘paid help’ is succinct.
No euphemisms

Good point.
Bet the goats aren't happy, though.

polnan Wed 04-Dec-24 16:52:03

Nan for me

AuntieE Wed 04-Dec-24 16:58:23

Sharr, I honestly don't think you can do anything about this without falling out with your mother.

What do the parents of your grandchild think of both their baby's grandmother and great-grandmother wanting to be called Nanny?

They might be able to suggest that this is confusing-

Of course, your grandchild might solve the problem by calling one of you nan, and the other nanny or nana.

In your place, I think I would let my mother call herself nanny, as she presumably has done before, and use a different name yourself. There are after all quite a lot to choose from: Gran, Grannie, Grandma, Nan, Nanna, or perhaps make up something new.

Deepf Wed 04-Dec-24 17:02:14

I'm Nana, I dislike Nanny I'm not a goat, Grandma makes me sound ancient and Granny well I like to live life not sit knitting in a shawl and rocking chair 😂😂

GrammarGrandma Wed 04-Dec-24 17:03:11

I didn't like Nanny, Granny or Grandma, so I am Nonna to my five grandchildren.

SaxonGrace Wed 04-Dec-24 17:03:23

I don’t like Nanny personally, all my grandchildren call me Nana which I much prefer, but it’s what suits that counts.

Emeraldforest Wed 04-Dec-24 17:07:13

I'm the only grandparent to all of my grandchildren sadly. I'm nanny. I never imagined myself as a grandparent and didn't like any of the titles, also I used to be a nannie as in nursery nurse.
However I finally got out of denial and I'm happy with nanny.

Mistyfluff8 Wed 04-Dec-24 17:07:51

I amNee by one set of grandchildren

Roddi3363 Wed 04-Dec-24 17:10:59

I’m an Oma.

Emeraldforest Wed 04-Dec-24 17:11:49

Once when I was working as a nannie the 2 year old called me Bubba, which I was told was a Yiddish term for grandmother! I was 22 so quite honoured!

notgoneyet Wed 04-Dec-24 17:22:32

I have twin great grandchildren. One of the boys early on designated my daughter (his grandmother) Nanna toot toot cos she always came to them in the car and always tooted them on her way out, and me Nanna choo choo because I always came to see them on the train!
We've now been upgraded to Nanna car and Nanna train, now they're nearly six