Gransnet forums

AIBU

To think that GN should not share threads with Twitter & Facebook

(105 Posts)
Leticia Tue 14-Nov-17 17:45:37

I think that this is completely wrong. Gransnet forums should be helping people and I can't see a reason for putting it elsewhere. If someone starts a thread what possible benefit can they get from people commenting on other sites when they don't even know it is there? If they wanted advice on Twitter or Facebook surely they would ask the question on those sites.
I replied to a recent one on books that deal with death for children. My first reply, mindful of where it would be read, was simply to give the book title and author. On reflection it didn't seem particularly helpful when it is a situation where I have had personal experience so I did a few more posts that I felt were more helpful. It was for people on GN, on that particular thread.
I then find that it is on Twitter with 19.1K followers and retweeted twice and on Facebook, followed by more than 13,000.
Why?
If they feel the need why not edit and make their own article? They could put 'gransnetters advise' rather than just lifting the whole thread.
Do the majority of gransnetters know where the threads go and that everyone can read them? I do not follow on Twitter to read them- neither do I follow or 'like' on Facebook and yet I can see them all.
It inhibits me. I had put in a plea not to use the one about death- it was ignored so my only option is not to offer personal advice in future.

M0nica Wed 15-Nov-17 15:06:30

It is not about sharing confidential information, or at least it isn't for me, but some threads about difficult family matters, even if the OP and her/his circumstances are unidentifiable are made for a small forum where many of the responders know each other and are online friends and write in an intimate and friendly way. Albeit the forum and its posts are open to other people who
choose to visit it.

Seeing these threads on twitter and Facebook has an uncomfortable air of voyeurism about it and diminishes both the distress of the OP and the comfort offered by GN members.

Bluebelle The Daily Mail can dip into our forum whether GN give consent or not. All it needs to do is dip into this open forum. I suspect that they have a staff member who does just that and is probably signed up so that they can sometimes start topics to get our responses, hoping for what they would consider 'traditional conservative(small c) reactionary responses'. Although they may have given that up as that is not what they got.

LucyGransnet (GNHQ) Wed 15-Nov-17 15:22:28

Hi all, just wanting to clear a couple of things up:

Leticia - as you know, the forum is an open one and anyone (including journalists) can read - and lift - the threads. With that in mind, creating a secret forum space away from journalists wouldn't really work, as there's nothing to stop them signing up as a member and accessing that space as well.

As we have mentioned (and as it's written in our Gransnet welcome here www.gransnet.com/forums) this is - and always has been - an open forum that anyone can see either by typing in our web address or googling and so forth. When we share threads on social media we never include usernames and try not to share anything that may be too identifying. We are simply, as someone has already pointed out here, sharing a link to the thread to encourage other Gransnet followers on those channels to come and join the discussion on the site. This does not make these threads any more 'open' than any other. Any visitor to the site can read any thread they like.

To clear up who sees the posts on Facebook: if you have liked the Gransnet Facebook page, you may well see our posts in your newsfeed on Facebook, the same as you would see them if you were to look through the 'Active' section on the forums.

If you are on Facebook, but have not liked the Gransnet page, you would need to search for and click on it in order to see our posts (unless someone you are friends with happened to share one). Gransnet's Facebook posts are not served to people who have never liked or followed our page - again, unless they are shared by a friend of theirs who does (follow us).

LucyGransnet (GNHQ) Wed 15-Nov-17 15:24:49

I should also add that if ever we suspect a thread has been started by a journalist, and can confirm that, we do delete and give short shrift!

merlotgran Wed 15-Nov-17 15:37:10

shock shock

Does it often happen?

LucyGransnet (GNHQ) Wed 15-Nov-17 15:38:38

Not very often Merlot and probably a lot less frequently than most users suspect!

JessM Wed 15-Nov-17 15:55:23

When you join it is clear that you don't retain the copyright of what you post. Read the Ts and Cs. GN has to publicise itself in order to get advertising revenue to pay the staff. Otherwise there would be no GN.

Leticia Wed 15-Nov-17 16:10:57

I understand that it is an open site which is why I have never put a profile and have tried not to give too many personal identifying details. I can even follow that it is advertising on Twitter and FB with the aim to get people to come over to GN. BUT equally people can start commenting on the other sites, which is no help to the person who started the thread.
I am a regular on Twitter and all the threads that interest me turn up there so I see no need to come over to GN.
I think there ought to be a large warning, where you add your message saying 'be aware that you are may well be posting on Twitter and FB'. And that people can name change if they want to.

Leticia Wed 15-Nov-17 16:46:48

Upon reflection I am going to leave Gransnet, (if I can discover how to do it).
I am not happy with the explanation.
I do not follow GN on Twitter nor do I follow or like on FB and yet I can look at both whenever I like.
I was very unhappy that my personal experience of being widowed young was shared elsewhere - used as advertising for GN- especially when I had put in a plea not to do so on the name changing thread.
I do not like being used for advertising - especially when I think they have many other ways of doing it.
I can't see the point of coming over to GN when it is all on Twitter and far more transparent.
This is my last contribution so just remains to say goodbye to all and best wishes.

M0nica Wed 15-Nov-17 17:02:37

Leticia We will miss you. Your posts are always measured and thoughtful (as above)

Greenfinch Wed 15-Nov-17 17:07:09

Hang on in there Leticia. Your arguments are sound and convincing and we need voices like yours.

Jalima1108 Wed 15-Nov-17 17:23:40

I'm sorry you are leaving Leticia

If you're still reading this thread:

Could you just change your name and stay - and not put on any personal details in future? Your contributions are always welcome and your posts are interesting so it would be a pity if you, and others who feel the same, all go sad

The unfortunate thing is that your posts will remain there even if you leave. If you started a thread yourself you could ask for it to be deleted for personal reasons; however, if you added to one you can't but you could ask for your posts to be deleted.

I don't think your actual posts go on FB - it is a heading and a link to the actual thread on GN, not lifted wholesale on to FB. I am not sure how Twitter works though as I have never got to grips with it (thank goodness).

Best wishes whatever you decide to do

Fennel Wed 15-Nov-17 17:31:10

Jess wrote:
"When you join it is clear that you don't retain the copyright of what you post. Read the Ts and Cs. GN has to publicise itself in order to get advertising revenue to pay the staff. Otherwise there would be no GN."
That's the reality of it. That's the world we live in now.
I've belonged to many forums over the years, and Gransnet is the only one which has developed such a high profile in the media. Probably something to do with its link with Mumsnet.

MissAdventure Wed 15-Nov-17 18:02:55

I would imagine it has got its high profile due to the threads here. They cover so many topics - infidelity, family rifts, affairs, abusive childhoods, birth, death, sex.. and its all that sort of stuff which most people don't wish to share with Facebook and Twitter, not least because their family members may well use Facebook/Twitter and recognise a situation or relative..

Bellasnana Wed 15-Nov-17 18:12:16

Not happy about it either. I don't do Twitter, but do have FB.
I never start a thread on here as I do feel a bit inhibited as to where it might end up. 😱

Bobbysgirl19 Wed 15-Nov-17 18:30:47

Lucy your post above states:

To clear up who sees the posts on Facebook: if you have liked the Gransnet Facebook page, you may well see our posts in your newsfeed on Facebook, the same as you would see them if you were to look through the 'Active' section on the forums.

If you are on Facebook, but have not liked the Gransnet page, you would need to search for and click on it in order to see our posts (unless someone you are friends with happened to share one). Gransnet's Facebook posts are not served to people who have never liked or followed our page - again, unless they are shared by a friend of theirs who does (follow us).

Unfortunately this is not strictly correct. I for one am not a member of Facebook, but if I Google Facebook Gransnet
it takes me straight to Gransnet on Facebook and I can read all the content there plus links. As I am not a member, Liking/Following means nothing to me!

Maybe you at Gransnet are not fully aware of this. Try signing out of Facebook and go on the site through Google, and see for yourself.

Grannyknot Wed 15-Nov-17 18:47:16

MissAdventure They cover so many topics - infidelity, family rifts, affairs, abusive childhoods, birth, death, sex..

That is a perfect description of a tabloid publication hmm. No wonder the Daily Mail likes GN forums! grin

BBbevan Wed 15-Nov-17 19:08:42

I signed up to Gransnet, not Twitter or Facebook. I can't remember being told when I joined that my posts would be shared outside GN. If I had I think I would not have joined. I post much less now and on non contentious threads

Willow500 Wed 15-Nov-17 20:19:12

I've just looked at the GN page on FB - I didn't 'like' it so it probably won't show up on my feed but I was able to link back in to threads on here and see my own contributions to them. It will definitely make me think twice about what I write - anyone who knows me but not my username would soon suss my identity in real life from discussions about family, pets and just in general. I do understand that nothing can be totally private when we're online - if I type my own real name and the username that everyone else knows me by things come up from years ago which is quite disturbing (not that there's anything bad out there). We are mostly all tech savvy enough to know that we have to be careful not to give out our personal details online for fear of cloning and fraud but over the years as we all divulge more information about ourselves it will become more and more difficult to avoid such things happening. Maybe the only real way to stop this is to regularly change our names - but then we'd lose the friendships which build up. Difficult hmm

Bathsheba Wed 15-Nov-17 20:50:17

I stand corrected. I had thought, didn't bother checking though, that the FB Gransnet page was a 'closed' group. But clearly it would not serve GN's purpose to have a closed group as they actively want people to know about the site.

lemongrove Wed 15-Nov-17 20:51:23

Now that we all know what happens, if you are worried, change names and never put anything anything about yourself or your family on GN ( that could indentify you)
You can still contribute to threads though.

MissAdventure Wed 15-Nov-17 22:46:50

Blandnet..

FarNorth Wed 15-Nov-17 22:59:59

If you are worried, change names......... only by asking nicely and getting special permission, not just by deciding to do it, like grown up people.

gillybob Wed 15-Nov-17 23:25:16

Leticia I hope you are still around to read this. I agree with you entirely . You don't have to "like" GN on FB or Tw (I haven't) and the posts are still there for anyone to read.

Exactly as Bobbysgirl19 said !

bumblebee123 Thu 16-Nov-17 08:14:35

HOLD IT< HOLD IT ............ NOW, Letitia, Bumblebee here, that is, MR. Bumblebee and not MRS Bumblebee as you intimated in your post. After all, how many women do you know called Brian. That is my name at the bottom of the post regarding favourite Christmas films. Now, gender settled, let's move on to your reason for your post. Depending how one reads your letter, it may suggest that I am a fan of Twitter & Facebook. What made you use my post about Christmas films? I DO NOT belong to either Twitter or Facebook I think I can see your reason for using my name and say to you, Letitia give me a kiss and lets make up.

Meanwhile, will the powers that be please remove the said posting from the forum. It's under AIBU

Brian Bumblebee 123..........

LucyGransnet (GNHQ) Thu 16-Nov-17 10:07:30

Bobbysgirl - yes, that is another way of finding the Gransnet Facebook page. Sorry, I didn't mean to suggest that the page is closed by not including it in my explanation - it's just not the typical route that people take to find it.