you probably think I am stupid.

I’m sure you are not “ stupid” at all. You sound very talented and have the skills and ability to run your own shop.
For some reason your self esteem seems very low at the minute and you are being very hard on yourself. Maybe this is about something else?
I’d just accept that crochet is not for you and do some knitting or sewing instead.
If you need a challenge, take up a new craft.

Don't despair! A friend of mine spent time struggling to get started with crochet, especially the magic ring thing. When I learnt to crochet there was no mention of magic rings!

Instead of battling with the not-so-magic ring, could you make a short chain and join it together to make a circle to start you off? What's more, don't let other people tell you that what you've done is wrong - don't show them! You'll know when you've gone wrong and will be able to work out what to do by trial and error.

Straight rows to make a blanket aren't babyish, I hope - I'm currently making a blanket that way. Each row takes ages because of the size and my fingers are aching by the time I get to the end!

You're not stupid. Don't give up. Good luck.

Well I'm stupid too then My granny squares are abysmal, very rarely square . I've followed every YouTube video there is I think.

There are a few different ways of doing magic rings too. Have you tried doing it in different ways? I find it also depends on the yarn: some are easier to crochet with than others.

It's wrong to think that all the nice things are made by starting with a magic circle - I made a beautiful scarf for MrA that I would gladly wear myself, made myself some gloves, and a couple of cushion covers in gorgeous yarns. Knitting a square takes some practice, and a few tricks, as the sides tend to go in and out if you're not careful so it's definitely not 'babyish'.

You certainly don’t sound stupid, in fact what a wonderful thing to have a yarn and craft shop. I can spend hours in them just looking at all the different and lovely things. I do buy something as well!
I don’t think friends or family are helpful when trying to get to grips with difficult concepts. Strangers are often better at explaining and teaching because they have no personal expectations of you. Do you have a yarn bombing group near you or Knit and Natter group. If so a kind member might take you under their wing and teach you.

poppysmum you are not 'stupid', wish that I could come and show you how to make a granny square. I don't start with a 'magic ring' I chain ten and join.

I'd say forget about granny squares for now and try a scarf or shawl - anything with straight rows as others have suggested. Not babyish at all!

Check out Bella Coco or Ophelia Talks and keep stopping and starting the video. It really doesn't matter if you square is not a square to start off with. Just keep practising and, believe me, the penny will drop and you will gain confidence. Some people are naturally very neat and get the tension right first time and these are the ones you see on FB with fabulous blankets they got right first time. Many of us have struggled for ages to get that tension right but it does come eventually. Good luck!

Oh dear, you are in a pickle! Any of us who do crafts find that some 'simple' things elude us!
I can crochet, and cannot knit! But there is one magic thing about crochet - it is much easier to undo! And 'granny squares' are just one part of crochet - I don't do them often.
Also, the nature of crochet is that basic rows can look beautiful depending on the yarn. I have a fantastic 'hitchhiker' scarf that is simply rows of double crochet, but made in a handspun silk / linen yarn, hand-dyed and it looks wonderful.

My aunt is in her 80s, and like you, began to find knitting difficult. When she began crochet (at my suggestion) she was all over the place - but as Tuaim says, the penny dropped - and she now makes lovely things for us.
Now, what you probably don't need is more suggestions, but I have some, which you can ignore if you like.
1. Make dishcloths to begin (just as we did as children!). Those that aren't up to much, use at home, but if you get a few nice colours to edge the basic ones, they can make a nice gift. My aunt turned up at a party with a basket with about a dozen in, rolled up and tied with a scap of matching cotton, they were lovely little gifts.
2. What's wrong with a lovely blanket / throw? One of my friends got a selection of colours (same yarn) and did a row every evening, selecting the colours depending on the weather.

I hope you enjoy your holiday - sounds like you could do with a break - and that maybe your fingers will find their way to doing something that satisfies you - which may or may not be granny squares!

Don't get hung up on what you can't do... I'd love to be able to Iceskate but I can't, I can ski though!

Focus on what you can do...

I'm stupid too then. I've tried hard to learn how to crochet and just can't do it. Don't beat yourself up. Just do what you can do. Best wishes to you.

Oh dear. I’m sorry you’re so upset. I too am a knitter and asked my daughter for a set of crochet hooks etc for my birthday - I was really looking forward to having a go. But I think my hands are just geared up for knitting, and I just can’t do it, no matter how hard I try. I don’t really understand why blankets are babyish. I would love to be able to do even that! I think that maybe the crochet is the straw that broke the camels back. Maybe you’re having a hard time at the moment with other things too. That good cry may help. Sending kind thoughts.

I am very good at craft but you have mastered something I never could - knitting! So dont beat yourself up.

My sister - who does not have my edication - knits beautifully. I never got past the basic stitches. This was probably because knitting involves following detailed instructions in a pattern and there is something in me which rebels against that.

I learned to crochet from my grandmother and loved it. Once you have the basic techniques off you can then freehand. She was left handed so I learned "cac handed" and was never able to teach anyone else. My sister never learned crochet. She hated it.

I learned embroidery, quilting and patchwork from my grandmother, as well as darning and making rag rugs. I was never allowed to sit idle in her company but always had to bring some "mending" (needlework, crochet or similar). If I forgot my gran soon had me winding wool or unravelling old sweaters. I remember those days with great fondness.

I am stupid also cannot master crochet, can only knit stocking stitch, that looks crocheted there is so many holes in it, but I do make a good cup of tea ,and enjoy a natter, so that is my role at knit and natter.

I am not at all creative or artistic so dont beat yourself up I am sure you have many talents.

Don't bother with a magic ring. Just chain 4 and join them with a slip stitch. When I learnt to crochet I made a chain and worked single crochet, half double crochet and double crochet stitches in rows to get used to making them. Only then did I try granny squares.
Keep trying, crochet is a lovely hobby.

BTW I've used American terms as most patterns I have use them, as do the YouTube tutorials.

You have my sympathy. I can knit, but crochet? Quite beyond me. I’m not surprised it reduced you to tears! I just wish people would stop saying “It’s really easy - anyone can do it!” No, they really can’t. Just stick to the things you’re good at - don’t make yourself miserable with what you can’t. We have a very good wool shop near here and I once asked the lady who owned it a query about the pattern I bought. “Oh it’s no good asking me,” she said. “I can’t knit for toffee - but I can crochet.”

I’m very stupid with crochet, too. I’ve tried a few times but just can’t get the hang of it at all.
TBH I do prefer the look of knitting, so I’m not too bothered though.

If you can do a chain, that’s all you need for starters. I can do very simple crochet and think that granny squares are not for complete beginners… so try a chain and feel a sense of achievement if you can do that.
My name refers to my brain as much as my love of knitting, btw! Good luck x

You're not stupid and you're not alone!

Like you, I've knitted many (dare I say lovely) garments over the years and have dabbled in other crafts. Never got the hang of crochet though - maybe it's because we're too smart.

Poppy'smum - I just had a thought - if you are going away for a few days, you could do what I did last year. I took a single skein of a nice yarn, and I crocheted a neck warmer - just rows of simple double crochet (though if you chose to knit, it would work just as well, and it's not too heavy). You adjust the size to suit you, so you don't need a pattern, and you end up either unravelling it, wearing it to do the garden / walk the dog, or something you are proud & pleased with - but most importantly, your hands have been moving!
I hope you have a lovely time, whatever you choose to do.

poppysmum you are not stupid . I have tried but can't crochet. I used to knit but had to give up 30 years ago as I could no longer coordinate my hands together.

I belong to a mixed medium craft group. One joined our group she could knit but wanted to learn to crochet one of the other members taught her. My craft group are brilliant anyone needs help with craft or life in general we help eachother.

I cross stitch unfortunately only started it in 2016 as I could never get my head around how little crosses can make pictures . I am addicted to it and only wish I had do it decades ago. My hands tremble all the time but while cross stitching they are still no idea why.

No everyone can do things but we can find something to do but our way. Is there a wool shop or craft group that would teach you to crochet? I live in the north west of England. Libraries up here have craft groups and local churches which are free to anyone who wants to join.

Don't give up! The number of times I've undone simple knitting [and I mean 'simple'] annoys me but I have another go - and another.......and eventually have it working out more or less correct. You are not alone Poppysmum

This may be a daft question, but why do you want to make a granny square anyway? Not much use to man nor beast, unless you want a single coaster.

Can you find a class, or a ‘knit and natter’ type group near you, where someone could show you? Or put a note in your shop, or a local Facebook page, offering to swap knitting guidance for help with learning to crochet?

Your friend sounds like a poor teacher. When I’m helping someone learn crochet (or anything), I show and explain the first steps, and then watch them do it so I can see where they are going wrong, and explain/show them the correct way again. And repeat as necessary. I wouldn’t just tell them it was wrong and leave them to struggle.

Having said all that, I am a little concerned by your response - it seems a little excessive to be weeping over crochet (or anything so unimportant). It really doesn’t matter, and if it upsets you that much, you might be better just not bothering with it.

A quick tip for absolute crochet beginners - try making practice chains, no stitches just the starter loop and ongoing chains. This will give you a feel for tension, most comfortable hold of both yarn and hook & also a feel for the rhythm of the craft. I do hope you can get into it poppysmum but you're certainly not stupid if it eludes you.