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you probably think I am stupid.

(38 Posts)
poppysmum Thu 18-Jul-24 17:44:24

I have my own yarn and craft shop and I like to or would like to do things to put in shop. I do make cards and they sell well.
years ago I used to knit anything and everything; I have loads of pics of my late husband and my children wearing lacy cardigans picture jumpers aran jumpers toys you name it I probably made it.
One thing that has eluded me is crochet; I have tried for over 50 years to crochet. I have this thing in my head I have to learn to make a granny square.
recently my wrists have been playing up again so the idea of crochet reared its head. I feel totally defeated even a simple garter stitch cardigan seems to turn out wrong I dont know why considering what I used to make why am I so stupid. I see some lovely things people make.
I have tried books youtube one to one for crochet I know the stitches can understand most abbreviations yesterday I tried to do a granny square my friend came in and did the middle for me as all this about magic rings etc was beyond me. I tried so hard but when she came in today she said she was sorry but what I had done was dreadfully wrong and she had to undo it all. when she had gone I soldiered on but later she had to undo it all again. when she went I laid my head on the counter and sobbed my heart out and havent stopped crying since why am I so stupid everyone can do squares why cant I granny squares are supposed to be so easy everyone does it my friend said forget it or just do as simple blanket just rows but that is so babyish I want to do something nice not a babyish bag or scarf but actually make something nice why cant I do the knitting I used to do why cant I do a simple granny square why am I so stupid I brought the crochet home I am going away a few days for my bday and would love to relax and so something but I am so stupid

Chardy Thu 08-Aug-24 16:13:37

Our crochet group meets in a fairly public place, and when mature women, like us, stop to chat, the most common opening line is 'I've knitted for years, but I cannot crochet. I have tried'

Most of us learned post-retirement. We all hold the wool and hook differently (especially hard for experienced knitters), and it took all of us ages to grasp the magic ring, though it is useful.

Anyone who wants to start, we direct to Bella Coco (left and right handed starter videos on YouTube). Bella Coco does an excellent beginner granny square video
www.youtube.com/watch?v=GALGQdP_POw

I prefer to learn anything with someone who's a little bit further along the road that I am. Someone who can remember the struggle!! Good luck

Callistemon213 Thu 08-Aug-24 09:12:26

This is quite an old thread I know but I meant to comment at the time and didn't.
Ditto, JackyB

poppysmum I knitted for years from being a teenager, didn't bother for years then took it up again when I had DGC.

Occasionally I tried to crochet but it always defeated me, trying to start with a row to make a straight piece but ending up with it getting wider and wider. An old lady who made Granny blankets tried to show me but I still didn't grasp it.

Then, during lockdown, I decided to try again and mastered a Granny square with the help of a simple book and YouTube videos (Bella Coco was one, MadebyAnita another and a Swedish woman but I can't remember her name).
The book was called First Steps in Crochet, I think (from my local craft shop).

I don't think I hold the hook and yarn 'correctly' either but whatever feels right is right for you.

Don't bother with a magic ring, fiddly and not safe imo. I make a chain of 3 or 4, join and crochet into the middle of the chain.

Granny squares can then be joined into blankets if you like with join as you go (I recommend Hooked by Robin for that).

My DGD won't wear knitted items now but do like their Granny square blankets.

The patterns and possibilities out there are endless!

JackyB Thu 08-Aug-24 08:17:46

This is quite an old thread I know but I meant to comment at the time and didn't. I learnt to crochet when I was about 8 and my mother taught me using really thin thread and tiny hooks - it was practically lace-making. I still have many of her.patterns from the 40s for dressing table sets (cheval sets), dainty gloves and so on. Of course, later I moved on to crocheting larger things with wool.

The point I was going to make, though, was that on the YouTube videos the way they hold the hook and the work looks very unnatural to me. I hold the hook much closer to the work and with the hook pointing downwards. They show it with the hand further back up the stem of the hook as with the hook pointing sideways. This may just be because it is better for filming, but it looks funny to me.

NonGrannyMoll Wed 07-Aug-24 20:11:52

It's not just you. A lot of people seem to have trouble with crochet, even those who are very talented in other areas. A friend of mine is a trained tailor. She's done cross-stitch, free-hand embroidery, the whole lot. But crochet? Forget it! For myself, I don't have any trouble with it. But I learned from diagrams in a book which didn't show the hands, so everyone tells me I hold the hook & wool all wrong! I still get better results than most of my friends, though. I think you either click with crochet or you don't, so if I were you I wouldn't worry. In any case, if you're having trouble with your hands, crochet is just as bad as anything else for making the joints ache! Good luck if you want to keep trying anyway!

Primrose53 Mon 22-Jul-24 09:09:16

1. As others have said, forget magic circle just do chains and join into circles.

2. As you finish your rounds look at them. They have to look symmetrical. So your sides should look the same and also corners. One corner with 3 trebles, 3 chains and 3 trebles is correct, if you do one with 2, 3, 2 it will look wrong. Just pull that bit back and redo.

3. Bella Coco video taught my niece during lockdown when books didn’t.

4. Don’t give up. Once it clicks with you, you will be away!

Woollywoman Sun 21-Jul-24 20:52:12

Granny squares can wait! A scarf would be easier than a granny square.

A chain is all you need to learn on Day 1.

Siope Sun 21-Jul-24 19:17:02

Oh, for pity’s sake. I said a single granny square isn’t much use… It was a way of saying ‘don’t fret over one possible way of learning, try another’.

Whiff Sun 21-Jul-24 13:10:49

Siope my friends at craft group would be appalled at you saying granny squares have no used apart from a coaster. My friends have made blankets ,bags,cardis ,jumpers , sleeveless tops ,scarfs ,even toys from granny squares .
Have a look at sites such as Gathered at the variety of granny squares you can make . Plus others sites and craft suppliers all have free patterns for making things using granny squares.

Helenlouise3 Sat 20-Jul-24 11:56:45

You are definitely not stupid. Just look at what you've achieved. Like yourself I hate being defeated by anything. I know you've looked at Youtube, but go on there and put Happy Berry crochet in the search box. She's fantastic and everything she does is explained and demonstrated perfectly. you can stop and start the video time and again if you make a mistake. Give it a go. You've got nothing to lose.

yogitree Sat 20-Jul-24 11:56:12

Magic Moon is right! A wee bit practice before attempting the squares.

Siope Sat 20-Jul-24 11:48:27

Just to respond to Siope - 'granny squares' can be useful for a blanket / throw and I have seen a beautiful jacket make with them

Yes, I know. But the OP is a long way from that, and I’ve never understood why so many people/tutorials suggest starting crochet with a granny square. As others have said, there are better and more straightforward ways of starting out.

If someone does want to learn something beginning with a ring, magic or not, I often suggest beanie type hats.

Nannarose Sat 20-Jul-24 11:23:54

Just to respond to Siope - 'granny squares' can be useful for a blanket / throw and I have seen a beautiful jacket make with them. BUT they are not the be-all and end-all of crochet, and you do need the geometry of them in your head, which not everyone can take to! Personally, I find simple rows of double crochet (US or UK) easiest.

I think we all have 'break down' moments when everything seems all wrong, so I'm glad OP is having a break.
I was good at a lot of crafts (except knitting) but have had to give up a few, including embroidery, as my arthritis worsens.

People who 'get' stuff are often the worst teachers. I have felt humiliated and despairing at times because I am very clumsy & unco-ordinated. Even at Aqua-aerobics, I have to be apart from others and do the exercises as best I can. because all sorts of sequences are beyond me, and I have never been able to dance (except simple folk dances). I have learned not to think it 'stupid' but to do the best I can.

I hope that, after a break, OP can find out whether crochet will be a lovely new craft for her to discover, or something she simply has to put aside.

Nannee49 Sat 20-Jul-24 11:16:43

A quick tip for absolute crochet beginners - try making practice chains, no stitches just the starter loop and ongoing chains. This will give you a feel for tension, most comfortable hold of both yarn and hook & also a feel for the rhythm of the craft. I do hope you can get into it poppysmum but you're certainly not stupid if it eludes you.

Siope Sat 20-Jul-24 11:08:32

This may be a daft question, but why do you want to make a granny square anyway? Not much use to man nor beast, unless you want a single coaster.

Can you find a class, or a ‘knit and natter’ type group near you, where someone could show you? Or put a note in your shop, or a local Facebook page, offering to swap knitting guidance for help with learning to crochet?

Your friend sounds like a poor teacher. When I’m helping someone learn crochet (or anything), I show and explain the first steps, and then watch them do it so I can see where they are going wrong, and explain/show them the correct way again. And repeat as necessary. I wouldn’t just tell them it was wrong and leave them to struggle.

Having said all that, I am a little concerned by your response - it seems a little excessive to be weeping over crochet (or anything so unimportant). It really doesn’t matter, and if it upsets you that much, you might be better just not bothering with it.

Athrawes Sat 20-Jul-24 10:42:47

Don't give up! The number of times I've undone simple knitting [and I mean 'simple'] annoys me but I have another go - and another.......and eventually have it working out more or less correct. You are not alone Poppysmum

Whiff Sat 20-Jul-24 10:27:02

poppysmum you are not stupid . I have tried but can't crochet. I used to knit but had to give up 30 years ago as I could no longer coordinate my hands together.

I belong to a mixed medium craft group. One joined our group she could knit but wanted to learn to crochet one of the other members taught her. My craft group are brilliant anyone needs help with craft or life in general we help eachother.

I cross stitch unfortunately only started it in 2016 as I could never get my head around how little crosses can make pictures . I am addicted to it and only wish I had do it decades ago. My hands tremble all the time but while cross stitching they are still no idea why.

No everyone can do things but we can find something to do but our way. Is there a wool shop or craft group that would teach you to crochet? I live in the north west of England. Libraries up here have craft groups and local churches which are free to anyone who wants to join.

Nannarose Sat 20-Jul-24 09:25:39

Poppy'smum - I just had a thought - if you are going away for a few days, you could do what I did last year. I took a single skein of a nice yarn, and I crocheted a neck warmer - just rows of simple double crochet (though if you chose to knit, it would work just as well, and it's not too heavy). You adjust the size to suit you, so you don't need a pattern, and you end up either unravelling it, wearing it to do the garden / walk the dog, or something you are proud & pleased with - but most importantly, your hands have been moving!
I hope you have a lovely time, whatever you choose to do.

BeverleyJB Fri 19-Jul-24 16:40:11

You're not stupid and you're not alone!

Like you, I've knitted many (dare I say lovely) garments over the years and have dabbled in other crafts. Never got the hang of crochet though - maybe it's because we're too smart.

Woollywoman Fri 19-Jul-24 15:56:39

If you can do a chain, that’s all you need for starters. I can do very simple crochet and think that granny squares are not for complete beginners… so try a chain and feel a sense of achievement if you can do that.
My name refers to my brain as much as my love of knitting, btw! Good luck x

Witzend Fri 19-Jul-24 15:47:45

I’m very stupid with crochet, too. I’ve tried a few times but just can’t get the hang of it at all.
TBH I do prefer the look of knitting, so I’m not too bothered though.

Greyduster Fri 19-Jul-24 10:13:36

You have my sympathy. I can knit, but crochet? Quite beyond me. I’m not surprised it reduced you to tears! I just wish people would stop saying “It’s really easy - anyone can do it!” No, they really can’t. Just stick to the things you’re good at - don’t make yourself miserable with what you can’t. We have a very good wool shop near here and I once asked the lady who owned it a query about the pattern I bought. “Oh it’s no good asking me,” she said. “I can’t knit for toffee - but I can crochet.”

MiniMoon Fri 19-Jul-24 10:06:48

BTW I've used American terms as most patterns I have use them, as do the YouTube tutorials.

MiniMoon Fri 19-Jul-24 10:04:43

Don't bother with a magic ring. Just chain 4 and join them with a slip stitch. When I learnt to crochet I made a chain and worked single crochet, half double crochet and double crochet stitches in rows to get used to making them. Only then did I try granny squares.
Keep trying, crochet is a lovely hobby.

downtoearth Fri 19-Jul-24 08:13:35

I am stupid also cannot master crochet, can only knit stocking stitch, that looks crocheted there is so many holes in it, but I do make a good cup of tea ,and enjoy a natter, so that is my role at knit and natter.

I am not at all creative or artistic so dont beat yourself up I am sure you have many talents.

biglouis Fri 19-Jul-24 00:43:34

I am very good at craft but you have mastered something I never could - knitting! So dont beat yourself up.

My sister - who does not have my edication - knits beautifully. I never got past the basic stitches. This was probably because knitting involves following detailed instructions in a pattern and there is something in me which rebels against that.

I learned to crochet from my grandmother and loved it. Once you have the basic techniques off you can then freehand. She was left handed so I learned "cac handed" and was never able to teach anyone else. My sister never learned crochet. She hated it.

I learned embroidery, quilting and patchwork from my grandmother, as well as darning and making rag rugs. I was never allowed to sit idle in her company but always had to bring some "mending" (needlework, crochet or similar). If I forgot my gran soon had me winding wool or unravelling old sweaters. I remember those days with great fondness.