I think RedheadedMommy is also right in a far wider sense. I can remember that when I had my DC, everything revolved around them and not me, which was why when my DGC were born I gave my DDiL a present, one that was personal and had nothing to do with babies. In one case a box of her favourite toiletries to pamper herself with, bubble bath, body lotion etc and after the birth of second DGC I planted a lavender border in their garden, something I knew she wanted.
In our case her mother is the on-the-spot grandparent and she has given the whole family immense support, although as she now she is in her late 70s and the youngest child about to start school this is tailing off. We live 200 miles away so cannot give the instant day to day support, but we are 'doers' which DS, DiL and family are not, so we have helped with decorating, refitting the kitchen, and now the children are a bit older look after the children during half terms and they are now reaching the stage where they can stay with us without their parents so we can give their parents the odd break by having them with us.
It is very sad when grandparents start competing for the attention of grandchildren. Step back, look, think and then find a niche that you can fill.