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Mumsnet and baby boomers

(51 Posts)
absent Wed 11-Feb-15 06:53:37

They do see to be quite angry, although not all of them. They have no idea what it was like to be growing up in the 1950s, 1960s and 1970s. We lived uncomfortable lives compared with the standards of today, without washing machines, refrigerators, central heating, telephones and cars to name some of the things taken for granted now. Many of us remember with rueful amusement ice on the insides of our bedroom windows on winter mornings. We regularly wore hand-me-down clothes and had one winter coat every few years. Girls were advised to become nurses, not doctors, secretaries, not entrepreneurs, assistants, not bosses and I can remember being turned down for a job because I was a woman. They have no idea of the kinds of lives we led. They have no idea about paying 14–15% interest on mortgages, but, yes, the deposits were easier to accumulate if you saved. Yes, we did have advantages that they don't have. For example, those who were fortunate – and clever enough because only a small percentage of the brightest could go to university – didn't pay tuition fees.

And how many of us have made "loans" to our children that we know will never be paid back. Some of us in fortunate positions have been able to help the next generation a little more. I bought my daughter a house for her 21st birthday and still find my bank account being plundered now she is quite a bit older. My parents and the rest of my extended family mucked in to help me. I do the same for my daughter, including many hours of childcare that wasn't part of my young womanhood.

Each generation has to make its own way. Each set of parents does its best to help. Perhaps we boomers were not as grateful as we should have been, but I don't think we blamed our parents for the hardships and difficulties we found in our adult lives.

Marmight Wed 11-Feb-15 07:14:29

Couldn't have put it better Absent

thatbags Wed 11-Feb-15 07:18:41

Maybe you should write a blog on the subject and submit it to Mumsnet, absent.

I think our generation were more independent as youngsters and didn't expect so much from our parents once we were grown up.

NfkDumpling Wed 11-Feb-15 07:30:53

Well said Absent. Have you posted this on Mumsnet?

J52 Wed 11-Feb-15 07:43:34

Very succinctly put. It sums up the experiences of most of us. Unfortunately, I think that if it was posted on MN it would still be picked to pieces.

As you put it 'they have no idea'.

I tend to think and want to say, 'stop moaning, get on with things and make sure your children have the best childhoods they can. This might mean not having everything money can buy.'


Riverwalk Wed 11-Feb-15 08:01:51

To be honest, although it's misplaced I can understand their resentment.

Rough sums: a property we bought in 1985 was around 4 x average UK salary; it's currently on the market for around 25 x average salary.

Add to that the plague of zero-contract hours.

baubles Wed 11-Feb-15 08:06:30

Very well said. absent. Please do post on Mumsnet.

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 08:17:27

I don't think we should be comparing the material possessions of then v now. Or the fact that coal fires were harder work and less effective than setting the timer on gas central heating. We lived uncomfortable lives but better than previous generations.

We had what was available then. So we had a car, fridge, telephone, colour TV. My parents had none of these things until after I left home. They never owned a car. My GM used a dolly tub and a mangle. All this was what was normal for the 'time'.

I can understand why younger adults get a bit pissed off when oldies rattle on.....we never spent money on x,y,z so you don't need it.

I have been over onto MN and they are moaning about the most fortunate of the baby boomers. Some Can't or won't accept that we are not all the same.

soontobe Wed 11-Feb-15 08:30:17

Good post absent.

I had better have a look at what mumsnet are saying.

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 08:34:42

If absent were to post her OP on mumsnet it would be ripped to shreds the mood some are in over there.

I think the fact that she mentions how much she helps her own would rile those that don't get similar. It is jealousy but understandable jealousy if you are a full time working mum, paying childcare, and looking at 70+ (maybe!) retirement age.

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 08:36:32

They are not getting it all there own way. Some are fighting the BB corner.

Katek Wed 11-Feb-15 08:36:35

Hear, hear absent!

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 08:38:22

Sorry their!

soontobe Wed 11-Feb-15 08:39:04

[Have only read a part so far].

Lots of them dont have envy whuch is good.

The house situation is bad for them, compared to the boomers. But not the boomers fault, which I think most of the younger generation understand?

I can understand their resentment re pensions. Though I dont understand a whole heap about pensions. So someone can correct me if they want to!

soontobe Wed 11-Feb-15 08:39:55

I will take a look at the end part now.

Leticia Wed 11-Feb-15 08:46:13

Threads like that crop up regularly on MN - I saw that particular one and didn't even bother to read it. They really do have no idea of what life was like and they really don't want to know if you explain.

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 08:46:29

They know in reality/anecdotally about the few very, very fortunate pensioners who,

Got free university education
Jobs for life
Retired at 50
Gold plated pensions with a generous lump sum
2nd homes
Lots of Holidays
New cars
Helping their own with ££££££ of free loans
Finding the fact they now get WFA and a free bus pass a bit of a laugh

They seem to think this applies to the majority of BB......If only!

soontobe Wed 11-Feb-15 08:55:22

uni education - they left school at 14. None went to uni or barely knew what one was.

jobs for life - yes there were a large number of them.

retired at 50 - I know one
Gold plated pension - ^
ditto 2nd home, lots of hols, new cars [with a personalised number plate!], helping own and the rest.
So I know one. And I have to say that he thoroughly enjoyed it!

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 09:10:13

To be fair I did know several who had free university education and signed on the dole during the summer holidays and no term time jobs either. I wasn't one of them. I started work after O levels and was a bit resentful that I worked long days and paid taxes. My former school friends appeared to be having lots of fun. I hated my mum for not letting me do A levels.

Retired at 50, 51, 52......Several

2 chartered engineers who were made redundant and decided to retire early. Wives were both teachers.

All the policemen and firemen we know retired young
Friend who was regional manager of the Midland Bank

Lots of teachers. Most were couples (one secondary/one primary) who retired together or a couple of years apart. They are the only ones in our 'group' who have 2nd homes in Wales/the Peak district.

Mamardoit Wed 11-Feb-15 09:19:50

To balance that out I also know people who will have to work until they drop.

My self employed DB says he will never retire.

J52 Wed 11-Feb-15 09:21:14

Thank goodness they have not latched on to the tax relief you used to get on mortgages up to £30000!

Shall I tell them and stir it up a bit? grin x

rosequartz Wed 11-Feb-15 09:37:44

Very good post absent and very well put.

We had what was available then. Marmardoit That is true, however, I don't remember, when we were struggling to pay a 15% mortgage, being resentful of my DP because their house was by then paid for, that they could afford a nice holiday in a hotel in the UK whereas we went camping. Our mortgage when we had to move to the Home Counties because of DH's work was over half of his (not very large) salary.

It's the resentment that is being stirred up that is so disturbing.

littleflo Wed 11-Feb-15 09:44:19

I have been reading that MN thread for a few days. Seems a recurring theme. I am glad that Margaret is standing up for herself. Not entirely sure she is real. I suspect she is just on there to goad them.

J52 Wed 11-Feb-15 09:53:19

University education was not totally free. Tutorial fees were fully paid, but living costs were covered by a grant. That was means tested depending on your parents income.

I had friends who's parents owned businesses and only father was the income earner. They had larger grants than I did, as I had two working parents.
No resentment, we were best friends. x

rosequartz Wed 11-Feb-15 09:53:43

If they are not kind to us we will be tempted to leave our vast wealth to the Dogs' Home - if we haven't spent it all on our own care.