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17 daughter is a mum, but..

(39 Posts)
downtoearth Tue 17-Nov-15 18:55:52

nannynoomy late DD was 17 and pregnant and she felt the looks and stares very keenly and to add insult to injury it was a mixed race relationship,and the comments from people where upsetting and hurtful in these so called enlightened times....especially the ones about the council flat and benefits.....my mum had her share of digs as well,I cant give any advice but please dont let their ignorance spoil your happy time with your beautiful grandson...there is a lot worse things that can happen in this world than a beautiful unplanned baby xxxxxxx

jinglbellsfrocks Tue 17-Nov-15 17:58:12

Do you mean that complete strangers tut and say things. Or just people you know?

ninathenana Tue 17-Nov-15 17:53:21

Why do people always think they have the right to judge others and comment on their lives angry
DH and I had fertility problems and were married 12 yrs before having DD.
I got fed up with people saying "Oh, so you don't want children then" I wanted to scream at them "Yes, I do !!"
I agree, broad grin and say how beautiful he is and how proud you are of your daughter being such a good mum. Congratulations flowers

morethan2 Tue 17-Nov-15 17:05:31

My son and his now wife had their first at just 17. I used to say 'I know arnt we lucky. He's a wonderful gift.! He wasn't a mistake, he was a blessing and remains so at 14. The best thing that ever happened to my family. We were truly blessed.

ginny Tue 17-Nov-15 16:34:55

Some people just love to judge. My DD has been married nearly 7 months and is 6 months pregnant. She says she still sees people mentally adding up the months almost wanting to be scandalised !

Congratulations on your beautiful DGS and congratulations to your DD.

loopylou Tue 17-Nov-15 16:28:17

I agree vampirequeen
They are sad, discontented individuals probably jealous and having miserable lives.
I bet your DGS is gorgeous!

vampirequeen Tue 17-Nov-15 16:20:41

Every child is a blessing. Some people (my youngest daughter included) just get a blessing slightly earlier than they intended.

Ignore those that sneer. They're not worth the energy.

You have a wonderful daughter and grandson. If other people are not able to see the wonder and joy of a baby then they lead very sad lives.

noonoo Tue 17-Nov-15 16:15:27

Maybe Im looking at iit from the wrong point of view. I will bore them with tedious things that only a granny could love!

J52 Tue 17-Nov-15 16:08:52

Congratulations on your lovely grandson.

People can be horrible. It is really none of their business, but like you I would want to make a comment back. The way to go is with a smile and a comment on how adorable he is and how much joy is now in your lives.
Then I'd be tempted to 'bore' then with every detail of his sleeping and waking moment!
flowers

x

soontobe Tue 17-Nov-15 16:04:09

I would say "isn't he lovely?", with a big smile on my face, so much the same as ll and Coolgran.

I think if you have to do it often enough, you will be ready for it, and lose your annoyance.

Coolgran65 Tue 17-Nov-15 15:52:09

This is......., He's my grandson, isn't he beautiful.
Don't make a sharp retort, keep happy vibes, perhaps your joy will be infectious smile

noonoo Tue 17-Nov-15 15:41:41

Im too annoyed by then!

loopylou Tue 17-Nov-15 15:37:56

Just smile sweetly and say 'He's gorgeous isn't he?'?
Unfortunately those likely to criticise tend to be impervious to others' feelings.

noonoo Tue 17-Nov-15 15:33:54

..other people can be so hurtful and rude. My daughter is 17 (and young looking) and has a 3 month old baby, my grandson. She's a good mum but when we are out, people stare at her and tut, you know the sort. They say things too and it really gets to me. I'm not normally out spoken but my blood bolis. I want to say to them ''Have you never made a mistake'' but that sounds like he is a mistake and he isn't he is gorgeous. Can anyone think of a really good retort that doesn't hurt my daughter, bt gets the message across??

Thanks fellow grans!
Noonoo