Step grandson

thatbags is so right re potential damage to immature shoulders. Forensic archaeologists always say that medieval archers are the easiest of all to link to occupations. Their pulling shoulders were so malformed.

Advice even! Definitely time for bed!

Good advive bags

Thankyou ladies
Really supportive and informative

You can't really buy a suitable bow, nor arrows, for someone without quite a lot of detail, actually. If he's really going to have archery lessons, let him use the bows that are lent for those first and then consult with his coach what he needs.

With children the danger is getting them something with too strong a pull, which can damage their not fully grown bones and muscles.

Please ask for more info, lostglasses, and maybe offer to pay for a beginnier's archery course at a properly affiliated archery club (ArcheryGB).

It is good fun. But the rules are very strict.
No running
Only approach the shooting line when instructed
Don't shoot before commence command
Collect arrows on collect command etc

Think if he is having proper lessons under supervision then the bow and arrow are fine. If not perhaps send cash and a small gift. It's difficult once you have asked what is wanted then not to get it. Perhaps contact needs to be more limited as none of you seem to be happy meeting up. Step families and grandchildren 's upbringing are a minefield tread carefully.

Judthepud2, my first thought was about Kevin too!

What a difficult situation for you, Lostmyglassesxx, when you can't just ask whether the little boy is having lessons or not. I certainly wouldn't be happy buying a "proper" bow if he's not, but would go ahead if he is, as he would then be taught how to use it safely. Perhaps you could email back to ask whether his instructor has stipulated a particular bow? Though what the heck you'd do if the answer was that there is no instructor, I don't know.....

How strange! Not allowed to watch cartoons or have an ice cream but allowed a real bow and arrow. ? Surely a child of 7 would not be old enough to understand the safety implications of this.

I don't mean to be funny here but having read 'We Need to Talk About Kevin' I don't think I could bring myself to buy these for him. Would it be possible to give him money instead? Then if something awful happens (sorry but you need to read the book to get where I am coming from) you wouldn't be responsible.

It sounds like a very difficult relationship, and that poor child....!

Archery lessons are good,
We have many children at our club including several severely autistic ones.
I would not reccomend buying a bow unless lessons are involved.
Even a small bow can kill someone if not used properly.
My bow only pulls 22lbs compared with most people's 30-50lbs pull, but I can still shoot over 200ft as I did today in clout shooting. ( I normally shoot target at 20-30 yds)
Ask bags she's more experienced than I am.

Good idea ! Thankyou
except it wil notbe well received !
However a gift should be from the heart with love so,I will definitely add something to the weapon
It's just another thing he has to perform at along with all the other sports and I want him to have fun and be free ...

What about archery lessons? Might be a good compromise, although it would seem that "compromise" is hard in the circumstances!

How old is the child? Is it a toy bow and arrows that's wanted or one that he could shoot at an archery club or range, while being taught how to do it properly and all about the safety aspects?

Could you buy him the requested bow etc plus something small and a bit more frivolous? Not too frivolous or she will fall out with you again, but something that comes from your ideas? Amazon has Robin hood hats for about £3 - £4 or so, and at least you'd feel you'd given him something that would be fun.
www.amazon.co.uk/s/ref=nb_sb_ss_i_6_14?url=search-alias%3Daps&field-keywords=robin+hood+hat+kids&sprefix=Robin+hood+hat%2Caps%2C198&rh=i%3Aaps%2Ck%3Arobin+hood+hat+kids

No heis not at a Waldorf school That is really interesting as there is a big Steiner school near here and I didn't realise it adopted these ideas .i would not be surprised if they had adopted some of the principles as part of their parenting regime ( and it is a regime !)
Thanks for reassurance on bow -if we were talking I would say to her I would rather buy something else .Partner says just shut up and blooming buy it ! So I will - not my family at the end of the day ( thankfully )!

Wow! What a lot of issues, and really impossible to have an opinion, as you say, I am sure it is all far more complex than it may appear. What I wanted to say is this; from the sort of bow and arrows you describe, it sounds like he may be doing archery, in which case, he will be taught how to care for the equipment, and the potential dangers. I would not be worried from that viewpoint. Also, you say he does not even know about robots. Is he by any chance, studying at a Waldorf School. In these institutions, modern technology is not allowed at an early age, and is introduced slowly and much later than most children see it. From what I remember of the system, television is also frowned upon. Also archery is one of the things that many children are taught at these schools.