To let them know, or not.

Wait. Your instincts not to worry people unnecessarily are spot on.

Time to tell if results are not good. But hoping that is not the case.

I would tell them. Your Son was upset you didn't share your TIA and hospital stay. They are family and most families share good and bad news. It hope everything turns out ok but if not your sons are prepared.

I was in exactly your situation earlier this year. I got a 'telling off' from my daughters and said I would tell them about problems in the future. Then I had to go for a colonoscopy and I told them. They just kept in touch by phone around the time of the exam and were as pleased as me that there was no problem. It is all behind us now and everyone is happy. If the exam was negative I would have had total support and we would have gone through it together. I think you have answered your own question Kiwi.

You have to put yourself in their position - would you want to know if it was your mother? I guess you probably would. You don't need to tell them the whole scenario, just that you are having the procedure. Then at least they are prepared before you know the result. Hope all goes well!

I would tell them, I told mine but we seem to be a family that worries when there is a need and there was no need to worry unless I had had a bad result so they didn't. I think , as has been said, that it depends on how you tell them.
I didn't have any sedation. Only a bit of discomfort twice when it felt like wind.

Good luck love.x

kiwibird when you get your appointment date please tell them you are having a check to see what's wrong.

Many years ago my widowed mother had major cancer treatment but hadn't said anything to either my sister or me until she was at death's door with radiation sickness. I was 300 miles away and my sister had just had a baby. DM recovered but at the time my sister's breast milk stopped with the shock and I travelled overnight to get to the hospital in a state of panic. If only she'd told us. We would then have been prepared and I could have been on hand to help her cope.

Mention it but keep it casual? "Not been well and having tests" sort of conversation. Keep it low-key? That way you haven't kept anything from them but not made a drama for them to start worrying about.
Incidentally after 6 months of pains and problems, I had a colonoscopy which found nothing wrong, but amazingly the procedure cured my problems!! Presuming it was the pre procedure clearout that solved it? Two years on and I haven't had a single problem since!
Good luck with everything.

I too have had a Colonoscopy, result is I've IBS. I didn't tell my DD or my DM who is now 88, they would both have worried particularly DM. My advice would be wait until you have the results, if however you feel you ought to tell your DS just say you're having tests for IBS etc without mentioning the C word. Fingers crossed for a good outcome

I would tell them.
My mother was someone who kept her ailments to herself. When she died suddenly it was a terrible shock. If I had known she was ill, I might have worried, but I would have had some idea that it might happen at any time.
If you tell your children, they too might worry, but if anything is seriously wrong, they will have had some warning. If there is nothing seriously wrong with you ( and I hope there is not) you can celebrate the good news together.

Tell them! Allow them to deal with it in their own way! Treat them as the adults they are

I think it's kinder to let them know that you are having the procedure, then they have been prepared gradually in case something more serious is found. I had this dilemma a couple of weeks ago when a suspicious mass was discovered during ultrasound. At first, I wasn't going to say anything to my adult children but I reflected on how I would wish them to tell me about their health concerns and thought it would be very hard for them if I had to tell them that I had cancer and they hadn't been prepared. I played it down a bit though. As it turned out from further tests, no mass or malignancy was found. My children handled it very calmly and I have been glad of their support. Hoping all goes well for you.

i would tell...

Say you are having tests, and will tell the outcome after the results. Best way I think, although I dont know if I would tell my children until after the event!

Tell them. They're adults, they can cope; and they love you, they'd like to be able to offer support, even if it can only be remotely.

You MUST,MUST,MUST tell them. Don't tell them the worst case scenario at the moment, just that you need to have this operation then if it is bad news you can tell them then. They need never know that you knew the worst case.

LouP the OP is not having an operation - she's having an exploratory procedure and IMO there's no need to tell anyone until the results are known.

I hope it all goes well for you and that it is nothing serious.
In your position I would not tell them until afterwards.

My instinct would have been the same as yours. A desire to protect them. However since they have said they want to know, I would tell them. My children are quite protective of me. They urge me to get things checked out, when I would ignore. Check up on me to see how I am. I am a very self reliant person but I think they enjoy the shift of 'Looking after me' for a change. I did walk around with a fractured humerus for 4 days, before my paramedic son made me go to hospital. I thought it was just bruised. He looked at it and said "good god mother! Are you mad.

I think your son does have a point about wanting to be treated as an adult. I think he would be very hurt if you kept things from him again.

My motherly instinct is not to tell them, however I got into trouble with both my children when I had to return to the UK from holiday for some urgent tests and didn't tell them until after I had seen the consultant. He was reassuring but I had to have minor surgery and biopsy which they then knew was coming. So - I think now you should tell them, in the light of your previous telling-off. Good luck by the way, and I very much hope all goes well for you.

Tell them but keep it simple . Regarding sedation I have had the procedure several times now have not had sedation it is uncomfortable at times but if you have sedation you have to stay longer at hospital and have someone with you for next 24hrs may be different at other hospitals of course but that for me was personal choice . Hope all goes well for you .

From the age of sixteen, people do not have to tell their parents about any health (mental or physical) issues they see a doctor about. The logical extension of this is that parents don't have to tell their offspring, however grown up, about their health concerns unless they want to. So don't let a son tick you off about your choices, kiwi. It's none of his business unless you choose to make it so, just as his health issues are none of your business unless he chooses to tell you. You might like to gently point that out to him.

In your shoes, I'd wait for the result of the colonoscopy. I might even wait after that until I knew what treatment I was going to have. Then I would state the facts in plain terms if, and only if, I wanted to. If I didn't want to talk about it I wouldn't.

I have two grown up sons, one in USA & one in Australia. We talk on Skype once a week. They're involved in my life from a distance as I am with them. If it were me I'd tell them. You will know what you feel comfortable with. Go with your gut.

kiwibird, my sympathies. I feel strongly that you shouldn't tell your sons about this until you get the results - after all, where does it stop otherwise? Do you have to tell them about every visit to the doctor?

I had the same procedure in Jan. Didn't tell the kids at all as I was only found to have diverticular disease which is very common in older people. Off back to hospital today to have a suspicious skin lesion looked at. Haven't told them about that either and won't unless it's serious - eeeek, scared! What could they do apart from worry and that's no help time or them is it?

GL carol - my mum had several of these which necessiatated visits to hospital, some of which were pre-malignant, and they were removed by freezing, so I hope you will have no serious problems, fingers crossed for you.