To let them know, or not.

How about telling them casually that you have decided to have a routine colonoscopy which you and your friends have agreed is a good idea as you get older. Just say "let me see, what other news do I have. Oh yes, by the way I am booked for a routine colonoscopy. Seems like a good idea these days"
...just an idea.
Yulle87

No I wouldn't tell until I had the results, and I know they would do the same with me if it was them.

Kiwibird Tell them ! When i lived overseas my DF was admitted to hospital, my brother didnt tell until the test results were in, i then had a mad scramble to get back to the UK. Thankfully in this instance i made it back and Dad was fine, But what if he hadnt been ? Living far away you rely on family to be honest and truthful. Your Sons dont need to spend their lives worrying that you wont tell them when you are ill. let them have a chance to make their mind up wether to come home or not.

I have thought about this a lot because of something that happened to me a couple of years ago. Like you, I annoyed my children by not telling them.

My advice, like a lot of folk on here, would be to tell them you are having the procedure and be honest about the results.

Just a little note to say that my elder daughter had a colonoscopy last week and elected not to have any sedation. She now says that sedation would have been the more sensible choice because the more relaxed your body is, the easier it is for the doctor and that they can complete it all a lot better.

Kiwibird I also think that you have answered your own question. I was roundly told off by our AC by not sharing what was going on with their dad. they were cross because they get they had been denied the opportunity to support us both. Fair comment I think. I hope it all turns out well for you.

I agree with those saying you should tell them.

I speak as one of the younger (ish!) members on here with a mother who lives several hundred miles away, but still in the UK. I was angry with my Mum when she had a recall after her breast screening. She didn't tell me and I told her if she wasn't going to be upfront about her health, then why should I? Since then we've been upfront, but it's always done as part of our regular chats on the phone.

It's not about whether or not it is/could be serious. It's about giving your adult children the true picture about your health as you get older.

Support can take many forms. You don't want to worry your family, I get that. But as adult children, we do think about the fact that our parents are getting older. If you don't keep them in the picture, you affect their ability to respond in the way in which they would want if you do become ill. You are creating a false impression about something that affects our emotional response as well as our practical response.

Just keep it informal and mention changes in passing so they can build a picture of how things are for you. Please don't create a false impression.

PS Take the sedation if offered!

How about you tell them aa it is...redux. I wouldn't make contact to tell them, but if contact takes place and they ask, just tell them that you are going for a checkup, doctor thought better safe than sorry. Like this you keep them informed while not worrying them to much.
I have three grown-up children and it isn't always easy to choose what to share out of my personal worries. They have their lives to take care of. On the other hand I have always been accused of being a mother hen...

Bless you Bless you it is a lovely sentiment wanting to save them worry. I am now going to revere your question - would you want to know if they were having the same procedure? Whatever is your instinctive response is your answer.

All I know is that when my mother was alive she was unwell and I kept on nagging her to see her GP which she refused to do. I then found out she had been and was being sent for scans and she never told me but asked a friend's husband to take her. I found out by chance that this was what had happend and fetl extremely hurt and insisted on taking her to see the specialist. I am glad I did as unfortunately he told her after a test and a wait of 2 hours that they could do nothing for her and she was terminally ill. As an only child I needed to know the facts as it was going to be me alone who would be looking after her. I would have hated to think she might have gone on her own and been given that news.x

Tell them now, then it won't come as such a shock later. My in laws only told my DH about illness when it was advanced and he was devastated they did not tell him earlier. He said it made him feel shut out.

mention it but say doctors just doing it to rule out ibs. i was in a similar situation, by downplaying it you have kept them informed but they are less likely to worry about ibs. if more serious they can be informed when test results are back. i didnt fully inform my family except my husband and close friends as none of extensive family deal well with stress/medical issues and they are not that supportive. i was concerned enough about procedure without having to deal with their egos/issues. if asked later you can honestly say that you had told them.

Again thanks for all of your messages. And for those who suggested that sedation is the way to go, then yes I do intend to have it, says me who likes to have an injection when only having a tooth filled.... How I'm thinking now. Well my gut instinct says that if one of my children was about to have a colonoscopy, or some other investigative procedure for symptoms that are a bit worrying then I would want to know whether we live near to each other or not. I don't need or want to make a big deal out of it because it might not be a big deal so I won't and will most probably casually mention it when in conversation. Thanks again. Lots of wise words given.

Again thanks for all of your messages. And for those who suggested that sedation is the way to go, then yes I do intend to have it, says me who likes to have an injection when only having a tooth filled.... How I'm thinking now. Well my gut instinct says that if one of my children was about to have a colonoscopy, or some other investigative procedure for symptoms that are a bit worrying then I would want to know whether we live near to each other or not. I don't need or want to make a big deal out of it because it might not be a big deal so I won't and will most probably casually mention it when in conversation. Thanks again. Lots of wise words given.

Again thanks for all of your messages. And for those who suggested that sedation is the way to go, then yes I do intend to have it, says me who likes to have an injection when only having a tooth filled.... How I'm thinking now. Well my gut instinct says that if one of my children was about to have a colonoscopy, or some other investigative procedure for symptoms that are a bit worrying then I would want to know whether we live near to each other or not. I don't need or want to make a big deal out of it because it might not be a big deal so I won't and will most probably casually mention it when in conversation. Thanks again. Lots of wise words given.

Again thanks for all of your messages. And for those who suggested that sedation is the way to go, then yes I do intend to have it, says me who likes to have an injection when only having a tooth filled.... How I'm thinking now. Well my gut instinct says that if one of my children was about to have a colonoscopy, or some other investigative procedure for symptoms that are a bit worrying then I would want to know whether we live near to each other or not. I don't need or want to make a big deal out of it because it might not be a big deal so I won't and will most probably casually mention it when in conversation. Thanks again. Lots of wise words given.

Woops. I managed to get my last message posted four times. Don't know how.

I would mention it to them, but in as casual a way as I could - perhaps as near to the date of the procedure to shorten the worrying. My DH has had two similar procedures in the past couple of years with nothing sinister found; the first time he refused a cup of tea from a nurse as he was awaiting the colonoscopy - she told him he'd had it already! You'll be fine I'm sure - let us know how you get on.

Having recently had a colonoscopy, which may I say, our Great British NHS handled very efficiently, I did not tell my only child until after the event as I did not want to him to worry and in effect put his life "on hold". I made the right decision as he was very worried when I told him about the procedure, but was able to reassure him that I had been treated and that there was nothing to worry about. He was so relieved, I'm glad I did it this way.

I agree - no point in worrying them till you know the worst. Hope you'll be fine, but if the worst happens, then you can tell them. DH had liver problem and other linked problems, went for tests and only after tests and surgery did he tell me that he hadn't planned on telling me about the bladder cancer they'd found - fortunately the op was successful and no allied problems since, but I was fuming that he hadn't told me before (didn't want to "worry me"!), since I'd already suspected - that said, we agreed no more health issue secrets between us and now discussed openly, so any worries or fears faced and shared before they become serious.

I would wait. What is the point of causing anxiety when it may well be nothing to worry about? If it isn't, you can tell them then.

You talk to them regularly so please tell them. It keeps them feeling wanted and part of your life.
Best wishes for a good result.

I asked my offspring what they thought and all agreed that they'd want to know, otherwise they'd be concerned about what I wasn't telling them. It works the same the other way around - I prefer to know if they're having tests done or what their worries are. I'd hate to be kept in the dark.

My son and family live in SpAin and I didn't tell them about my colonoscopy. All well, diverticulitis by the way. Why worry them? If it turns out to be more serious, you can then tell them, fudging the dates a bit.

Keep it secret until you have results.