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Should I let the police give them a warning?

(67 Posts)
Sourcerer48 Fri 09-Feb-18 11:27:58

A couple of days ago there was a ring on my door, a strange young man was standing there and in a most aggressive manner asked me to move my car as he could not get his £11,000 car into his parking. When I asked why he had such an aggressive attitude he turned his back and said just move your car.
My car was in my personal parking and there was actually plenty of room, when I said so this man said yes but when you drive out you will hit my £9000(?) car. I replied that I actually had a driver's license!
It then went from bad to worse, his boyfriend came over and the two of them were like bristling dogs. The first man then said he was a trainee policeman, well, I said, you should know better and it's appalling that the two of you are ganging up and bullying an old woman like me.
The long and short of it was, a neighbour advised me to call 101 and report the matter to the police as I live alone and these two men live right next door.
This I did and found to my surprise that they took it seriously and will be coming round to take a statement.
My question here is should I let the police give them a warning or just let it be and have the incident on record in case anything further occurs?
I'm just afraid of what they might do if they know the police are involved.

mollie Fri 09-Feb-18 11:31:03

Let the police decide. You’ve reported it now and the neighbours were unpleasant. They won’t change their attitude without help. I suffered bullying over a parking space years ago and wish I’d reported it. My neighbours actually broke into my car and moved it several streets away on two occasions.

silverlining48 Fri 09-Feb-18 11:36:09

It will be up to the police to decide and you were right to contact them.

Nanabilly Fri 09-Feb-18 12:59:48

Let them do what they think best and follow the law. Is he really a trainee policeman if he is then this may impact on that career and he should know better. What he did to you was bullying and if it were me and my car was parked correctly I would not have moved it just because he cannot drive or park correctly.

Nonnie Fri 09-Feb-18 13:09:13

I agree, let the police decide. Wish I had taken their advice a few years ago and had someone arrested, it might have saved so much heartache.

Mapleleaf Fri 09-Feb-18 14:31:32

You did the right thing contacting the police. Their behaviour was bullying and unnecessary. I hope the matter is resolved for you.

Sourcerer48 Fri 09-Feb-18 15:51:07

Thanks for your advice, much appreciated.
Sorry, Mollie & Nonnie that you had such bad experiences.
It's all so unnecessary and scary actually that people think it's OK to behave like that.

eazybee Fri 09-Feb-18 16:01:05

The police will decide; I should imagine they will simply speak to them and record the incident, but they take a very dim view of anyone using their real (or assumed) role to threaten members of the public. A policeman father once tried to threaten a new male teacher when confronted about his son's behaviour; the Head threatened to report him and he apologised profusely immediately.

Anniebach Fri 09-Feb-18 16:14:27

The police will make the decision, more so if one is a cadet police officer

Nonnie Fri 09-Feb-18 16:23:27

If he is not really a a trainee policeman then impersonating a police officer is a crime. If he is then his superiors should be told what he did.

Do let us know what they say.

grannyactivist Fri 09-Feb-18 16:31:15

Hopefully the police will deal with it as a conflict resolution issue and get you together so that everyone is heard and agreement is reached. Hopefully with an apology to you from the aggressive young man.

Alexa Fri 09-Feb-18 17:24:41

I bet he would not so have addressed a burly young Rugby player ! You did well to tell the police. They will look out for you. It's one of the really rewarding duties they have to do.

Elizabeth1 Fri 09-Feb-18 21:53:27

Good for you reporting this bully to the police. I detest big bully boys and girls. I remember at work one day a mothers son kept swearing at her carers saying all sorts of things which were untrue. In the end I had a quiet word with him telling him to stop abusing the care staff otherwise he would get reported to the police. The bully son immediately backed down and became a wee mouse in all future interactions.

SpringyChicken Fri 09-Feb-18 23:11:31

Stand your ground and speak to the police, Sorceror. You are in the right here and they'll no doubt bully you again otherwise.

Jimbow15 Sat 10-Feb-18 07:54:57

Great for you being so brave. Normally the police will decide depending on the response they get from the 2 men.
They will certainly think twice in future I would imagine

theresacoo Sat 10-Feb-18 09:06:33

You did the right thing. Their behaviour was disgusting and arrogant. If you put up with this it would happen again. A trainee policeman should know better.

Molly10 Sat 10-Feb-18 09:16:19

IF he is a trainee policeman then it is a strong lesson for him not only in anger management but bullying and dealing with the public and particularly elderly public. When the police arrive for the statement make sure you relate the trainee policeman comments to them and they will deal with accordingly.

Foxygran Sat 10-Feb-18 09:21:15

So sorry to hear of your bad experience Sourcerer.
Personally, I would welcome the incident being recorded and the police visit. Make sure you keep a record of the incident number and the date for future reference.

I wouldn't want the police to contact them at this stage as there is then always room for a brief but civil exchange when you see them in the future, as you surely will. Just a nod for 'Good morning' would suffice to keep neighbourly relations.

Once the police are involved they are likely to take umbrage and the atmosphere likely to be permanently hostile.

I really am very sorry to hear of your unpleasant experience and wish you all the best.

radicalnan Sat 10-Feb-18 09:25:39

'A trainee policeman'.......I doubt it.

He sounds like your average tw** with an ego problem.

Let the police deal with him.

sarahellenwhitney Sat 10-Feb-18 09:27:54

Well done you. There are far too many of this type around these days. Give a statement to the police. IF? as that person alleged he is a trainee policeman ??then your statement will show he used this during his threatening behaviour. You felt intimidated and make this obvious to the police. They are bullies and it is highly unlikely they would have used this behaviour were they confronting a male.

Maidmarion Sat 10-Feb-18 09:33:22

What horrible people.... Glad you got in touch with the police ... and as others have said, if he isn't a 'trainee policeman' then that is a crime, and if he IS a trainee then that is an appalling way to behave. Good luck and don't forget to tell the police about the 'trainee'!!

Yellowmellow Sat 10-Feb-18 09:33:46

I work along side an Anti-Social behaviour team as part of my role. NEVER put up with this type of behaviour. The team/police will not just leave it 'as a telling off' if these people continue to bully you (this is what they are doing). The procedure is you make the initial call to 101, this will be followed up by a statement being taken. You will be kept informed and the team will not withdraw until the issue is resolved. Please see this through. once a bully always a bully....another issue could arise if you dont tackle it. If this person is a trainee police officer he will be pulled to task believe me x

Tessa101 Sat 10-Feb-18 09:35:46

I’ve had similar situation but not over parking. I would advise you to say to the police could you talk to them off the record first and get there advise. Because once you made a statement it’s then down to the police and out of your hands and they can go and arrest and charge them if they see there has been a crime committed. I made a statement against them and was asked was I prepared to go to court to defend my case. I did not want to go to court or for it to go that far but was told it was a criminal offence what neighbours did. So decide before police arrive how far you want to take it. In my case I just said would you please have a word with them and caution them. Good luck let us know how it goes.

Maggiemaybe Sat 10-Feb-18 09:36:35

Don’t play down the incident when the police come round. Impersonating a police officer is, rightly, a serious offence. And if he is a probationary cop, then he’s just the type of person the police service definitely does not want!

blue60 Sat 10-Feb-18 09:37:03

Good that you reported it! There are too many people around these days thinking they can do and say just as they want without considering their actions.

Perhaps a word from the police could possibly make them reconsider their behaviour. In any case, why should you have to put up with it?

I would follow police advice whatever they suggest.