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Brave the Shave, part 2

(31 Posts)
phoenix Wed 25-Jul-18 11:23:45

Well, my pack arrived this morning, and I have spoken to my hairdresser (who by the way is horrified! shock but some people I have spoken to about it think that as my hair is quite short anyway, (short cut, i.e no length to tie back, but with 3 to 4 inch layers) that it's hardly a "sacrifice".

I was planning to go for a number 5 clipper cut all over, which still counts as a shave, but have been a bit disheartened by some responses.

I know when I first posted about it on here there were mixed feelings, but overall most members were supportive.

I am hoping to get it done on August 7th, just a few days after my 60th birthday.

What do the Grans think, should I still go ahead (no pun intended! smile

MissAdventure Wed 25-Jul-18 11:26:03

Undoubtedly yes from me. smile
Anything which raises money is a good thing.

baubles Wed 25-Jul-18 11:41:04

Haven’t seen the other thread, is this a charity thing & you’ll grow your hair back afterwards or are you going for a permanent Sinead O’Connor look?

rubytut Wed 25-Jul-18 11:51:39

When I see an older woman with a shaved head I assume, often wrongly , that they are having chemo. Be prepared for sympathetic looks or people looking away. I find it a bit odd when people do this to show support as people do not have a shaved head all the time to support people with alopecia when their hair never grows back.

ffinnochio Wed 25-Jul-18 12:08:21

I feel there’s more than one issue going on, as you seem unsure.
Charity + marking 60th Birthday?
Charity + making a statement about .....?
Charity + having fun

I remember you went semi-pink a while ago, so it seems to me your hair is an important part of who you are - like a lot of us, I guess.

It’ll grow back if you hate it.

Think what I’m trying to say is be very clear about exactly why you are doing this.

Anyway, why the hell not do it! I couldn’t, so 🖐 to you if you go ahead.

phoenix Wed 25-Jul-18 12:24:44

ffinnochio have pm'd you!

SueDonim Wed 25-Jul-18 12:25:01

I wouldn't want to risk offending anyone who had hair loss that wasn't their choice, so no, I wouldn't do it. You could donate the cost of the hair cut to the charity you wish to support, instead.

GillT57 Wed 25-Jul-18 12:34:19

This is a tricky one. A friend who lost her hair due to post breast cancer chemotherapy is very anti this 'brave the shave' event as she feels is trivialises the feelings and sensitivities of those who have lost their hair, but not by choice. However, if it raises money.....

MissAdventure Wed 25-Jul-18 12:44:19

My daughter had no objections, so that goes to show that everyone is different.

GillT57 Wed 25-Jul-18 13:21:48

Indeed it does Missadventure, we all react in different ways and I applaud Phoenix for what she is planning. The point my friend made was that she doesn't like the 'entertainment' aspect of it.

phoenix Wed 25-Jul-18 13:45:03

I haven't yet decided if the actual event is going to be public or private, if "public" it will be at work, rather than in a pub or other social place.

I expect I will decide on private, but will see what happens.

Just a shame that my hair isn't quite long enough to be donated (which is another option you get within the pack, it goes to make wigs for children who have lost their hair) but I don't expect many would want a wig made from silver/grey hair anyway! smile

Doodle Wed 25-Jul-18 14:02:34

phoenix I think the key point is why you are doing this. I think from your previous post your thoughts are to raise money to support people with cancer. Your intention is not to mock, ridicule or make light of others suffering but to help. That is a good and kind intention.
Everyone will have their own opinion, some for and some against. Not everyone with cancer loses their hair and many without cancer lose their hair too.
Whether you go ahead or not is your decision but I applauded your kindness in even thinking about doing it.

Doodle Wed 25-Jul-18 14:09:16

Just a thought phoenix (relating to my misunderstanding of what I thought you were planning to do in your part 1 post), if you wanted to do it with no chance of offending anyone, you could er..shave the other region! 😱

phoenix Wed 25-Jul-18 14:38:46

Doodle bearing in mind that Macmillan ask us to upload before and after photos, I rather think not! shock

Alima Wed 25-Jul-18 14:56:24

Phoenix, I have read several of your posts about your hair, colouring mishaps etc, and can tell it means a lot to you. I think it would be a wonderful thing to do to raise money for such a deserving charity. (DH had palliative chemo a couple of years ago, not strong enough to make his remaining hair fall out. He thinks it is a brilliant way to raise money). Anyway, far better on your head than an all over shave for your cats!

FlexibleFriend Wed 25-Jul-18 15:30:59

If it's going to raise money for cancer charities I think it odd that people would try to put you off but a No.5 is quite long and you'd be able to have it cut into a proper short style afterwards. Anything longer than a No.2 really isn't a shave. Mine wants cutting at the moment and it's not much longer than a 5.
It's your hair and you should do what you want.

phoenix Wed 25-Jul-18 16:19:54

Have just measured my hair, and apart from the bit at the back of my neck, and above my ears it is about 4" long, my fringe comes down to my eyebrows, so I think that going to a No. 5 does count as a shave, as it will be done with clippers.

Be interested to see what others think.

KatyK Wed 25-Jul-18 17:13:49

phoenix You are braver than you realise. I am not looking for sympathy here but speaking as someone who has lost all of their hair through alopecia, I can honestly say this is a brave and wonderful thing to do. Your hair will grow back, mine never will. Before I lost mine, I had no idea of how devastating it would be. Your hair is part of your identity. I nearly lost my marriage through my distress. I would be very interested in your experience, and how it makes you feel, once you have done it.

phoenix Wed 25-Jul-18 17:39:27

KatyK flowers and thank you for your supportive words.

shysal Wed 25-Jul-18 17:44:53

Go for it phoenix! It will be a sacrifice for you but would be worthless if it wasn't.

shysal Wed 25-Jul-18 17:52:16

I have been fortunate enough to win the GN competition for £500 worth of best summer reads. There are dozens of books on their way to me as I write. I have planned to use them to make some money for the Macmillan charity in some way after friends and family have had their pick. If I can get something sorted in time I will donate the proceeds via your effort.

lemongrove Wed 25-Jul-18 20:52:16

Only you can decide this matter Phoenix

lemongrove Wed 25-Jul-18 20:52:54

Oh Shysal well done!

annsixty Thu 26-Jul-18 08:18:28

Am I wrong in thinking a shave is a shave.
This is where I will admit there is no way I would do it, it would be a step too far for me, but if I did it would be a shave with foam and a razor or I would find some other way to support the charity.

annsixty Thu 26-Jul-18 08:48:08

I realise that sounds unkind and that is not what I meant.
Just wanted to say it really should be all or nothing.
Brave the shave should really mean that, not make a gesture.