How do I meet someone new?

It is seven years since I met my now OH on a dating website and I have to say not one of the correspondents who wrote to me, nor any of the few I dated, mentioned sex or sent any objectionable photos.
I am only mentioning this as I found it an ideal way to meet new people.

I was widowed at 57 almost 6 years ago after 23 years together (21 married). I love male company but have no desire to find H no4. I lost the "love of my life" but do not spend my days grieving.

I moved to a new area 4 years ago so I had to make new friends, I recommend Meet Up groups, one group is mainly female but there are some male members (growing slowly) we meet for coffee, lunches, theatre trips etc, I also belong to another group which is made up of singles, couples & a mix of age groups, I've had some nice Lunches & week-ends away.

I have a few male friends who I chat to frequently. If anybody tries matchmaking I just laugh & say "I'm not training another one & I'm not changing my (very unusual) surname"

The suggestions of evening classes, other interest classes and U3A were ones I was thinking of too, and the gardening is a good idea, as well as other kinds of volunteering. You never know who is in that kind of group or who you'd meet through them. If you visit old people to chat or help they might have a nice son ;). I used to be a hospital radio DJ years ago and hospitals do need volunteers to help raise fund, Hospital Friends, run the shops and run the radio station apart from being DJS, and going round to get requests from wards. I found there were more men than women there, although I was married and not looking for a partner. They were very nice people too.Most volunteer group members tend to be,.

I’m on a couple of dating sites and never been sent a “dick pic” I don’t know whether I should be relieved - or disappointed!!

POF is free and seems to attract some strange men!
(and women, so I’ve been told).

Am fed up of kissing frogs............

Over 50’s Meet Up groups are in many areas now and I’ve had a few nights out with them, theatre, concerts, dancing, meals etc they cater for most tastes. Try Singles holidays too, I’ve had some lovely ones and met some really nice people. Unfortunately many people just view dating sites as a quick route for sex, and any man who starts talking about sex before you have even met him, needs to be avoided at all costs. One day at a time, make a bucket list and just fill your life with whatever gives you pleasure.

If you like gardening (or even want to learn more about how best to do things in a garden) I'd suggest you volunteer at a local community garden. The people are great and there are always lots of men around who, if they are not too keen on growing things, just love to build raised beds or help restore greenhouses/outbuildings. My lot are a very social bunch so we are always having parties and events!

I’ve been on my own for over 8 years and have tried various dating sites which have been awful! However, a couple of months ago I found one called Zoosk which has thrown up many decent men looking for friendship maybe leading further. I have now met two nice men one of whom is more than perfect for me - he wants to take things at my pace and we have the same interests so, fingers crossed, this could be the start of a new friendship/relationship ?

After 30 years of being on my own, I met someone special at our local table tennis club. I've also met loads of lovely people in the nearby rambling group. I am 71, and now have someone to go on holidays with and do all the other things that are better when you have someone by your side.

A friend of mine in her 70’s was widowed 3 years ago. She is interested in nature and wildlife which she photographs and puts on Twitter. She has made many male twitter friends through this medium but has not had a ‘relationship’ with any of them as she is still grieving her DH. However these friendships have given her a new lease of life.
A word of warning though. Too many people put too much information on their twitter pages. My friend even named the street where she lived and posted a picture of her back garden where it adjoined fields. She is very liberal about her holidays and days out, often giving locations. Apparently another friend had a word with her as she too was concerned and now I understand my friend is much more careful with her tweets.
As others have said...find something that interests you and join a club or society. Some day you.ll meet someone who you will be attracted to and maybe want to know him better. Never Give Up x

My advice would be to learn to love your home, yourself, your family and your friends.

Then join a few things you enjoy and just carry in with your life. When you are open, happy and positive, things come to you. If there is someone you meet who you really like, let it develop naturally. But don’t be desperately seeking. Just live life day by day. X

Honestly you are still young and fit so there's no hurry .
As others have said keep doing things you enjoy.
Volunteering? There are conservation groups within the National Trust who repair paths and walls. I think. They always look as if they're having fun.
Keep yourself busy and happy. Happiness is infectious.

Whilst the WI is a women's group I have made some good mates through being a member and socialise with them outside of WI events. If you are not looking specifically for a partner then making a new set of women friends may be good for getting over the blow of a bad relationship.

How about going to church? Lots of nice people and associated social events. It's a question of widening your contacts to meet different people. You never know who you might meet.

Just to reiterate for new members, Denil963 is an established member of GN and has been posting for quite some time.

I remember your original post last year Denil and wish you well in looking to the future.

A creative writing course obviously comes in handy when needed.

Thank you. I've joined a few groups. I did an OU course in creative writing - and loved it

Well that's an excellent start. If you have a look at the Ramblers Association they have details of groups, with all levels of ability, that you might find of interest. I met one of my closest friends through a walking group. Open University may also have online or local writing groups too. Good luck.

Thats an old post

Thank you all for your response. Telly, I'm doing well, have been having counselling and enjoying life again, so I want to meet new people even from a social aspect or dating. I'm not looking for marriage
I've emailed Ipswich poetry group, as I write poetry, and would enjoy that and a walking group - and will certainly go through other suggestions! It's hard in many ways reaching mid life and starting all over again - I'm lucky to have a great family and supportive friends, but they all have their lives to get on with.

Seems to me that you really need to recover from your past experiences rather than look for a new partner at the moment. You also talk about men you have met online who just want to talk about sex, well I guess that is all they are looking for. I can't think that many women would be willing to engage in this type of discussion with someone they have either just met, or not actually met at all! Time to concentrate on meeting new people and establishing a new life for yourself. If you meet someone along the way then fine. There are lots of good suggestions here so pick some that appeal.

*Deni1963 Mon 04-Dec-17 10:32:25
I have my daughter, partner and 18 month grand daughter here ( that's his main issue) saving for a deposit on a house. I can put his stuff in the shed - locksmith will charge £50 to change lock*

I'm so sorry, I would like to offer advice but your situation seems rather complex. Perhaps seek professional help?

Hi Denil63, I remember your name but not the awful time you have been through. Do you have enough free time to join a U3A organisation or a rambling group? Or some sort of group in which you have an interest which I now notice grannyactivist has advised! Get a dog, always make friends when you have a dog. Good luck

grannyactivist I haven’t heard ‘going steady’ for ages ? I think it’s ‘in a relationship ‘ these days.

Denil Check out what's on in your area - when my lodger was new to the area she joined several 'meetup' groups, including a social group, walking group and a dinner group; she's now 'going steady (does anyone still say that?) with a chap she met at one of the group meetings.
www.meetup.com/

To meet someone new, you have to go to new places. Find your local authority evening class list and choose a course that sounds interesting. In this area there are exercise and sports courses, walking groups (some of these are round historical parts of town, or interesting gardens or houses), starting a musical instrument, various arts and crafts, family history, and plenty of others.

In some areas the list is shorter, but there will be something, and looking online could find some which are not run by the LA. Prices are usulally discounted for older members.

Some subjects have more men at them than others - you probably wouldn't meet many at a knitting and crochet group.