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Going away

(91 Posts)
etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:34:58

My dD and partner are going for a weekend without their dd. I'm having her for 1 night other gran is having her second night to be diplomatic. I know she will cry for her mum. I never left my dd. Does anyone think this is ok.

etheltbags1 Fri 19-Jul-19 21:05:42

It all went well. We playd and went out then i took her to other gran. I worried about nothing .dd and partner had a nice time so glad.

GreenGran78 Sun 14-Jul-19 23:29:47

I agree that staying a night with one set of GP, then going to the others would be unsettling for her. Much better to stick to one venue for both nights.
Some children fear that Mummy and Daddy won’t be coming back, if they see them leaving. A good tip is for the parents to give something of theirs, such as a favourite garment, for the child to “take care of for us, until we get back.” Somehow this seems to reassure the little one that they will definitely be returning.
Just relax, and have fun. Children can sense if you are tense, and it worries them.

Sara65 Sat 13-Jul-19 08:34:27

Tedber

Sounds fun! We regularly have all the cousins staying, they had to improvise last weekend because some rooms are being decorated, but they had great fun gathering blankets and throws and pillows from around the house, plus quite a few things that didn’t seem quite necessary, to make a camp.

Sadly, I couldn’t leave them outside now, but they still have fun.

Ethel, you have all this to look forward to!

Peonyrose Sat 13-Jul-19 08:18:59

Ethelbags I had mine from when they were 6 weeks. They are all lovely outgoing teenagers now, but I loved that time with them, now they are a bit too busy and working hard for us now. I love it when they do visit and they often talk of their time they did spend with us, I say us, but now it s just me.

Tangerine Thu 11-Jul-19 23:24:01

I think you will find your granddaughter enjoys her sleepovers.

She needs to get used to being separated from Mum in case her mother ever has to go away for work or into hospital.

It's only two nights. I hope you have a wonderful time with your granddaughter.

moggie57 Thu 11-Jul-19 22:09:47

how about asking her.? she is 6 .. you can make it sound like a lot of fun ,so not to scare her. have her parents talked to her about it....what does she think?

harrigran Thu 11-Jul-19 09:30:44

Took big sister on holiday and left two behind 🤔
A little unfair, my parents did that and I have never forgotten.

Longdistancegrnny Wed 10-Jul-19 22:41:33

Just had my nearly 2 year old twin GC for 3 days while their parents took big sister to EuroDisney, all well - they only asked for Mummy if they had a tumble or similar, no problems at bedtime, but they have been staying here for the past two weeks with the family over from Australia. Next week it’s three more days with us with big sister while parents have a short break, we make the best of it as soon they will all be back in Australia, and we won’t see them for several months. Mine all had sleepovers from quite a young age and aunts would come here to look after them while we had short breaks....relax and enjoy her company etheltbags1

glammagran Wed 10-Jul-19 19:26:02

I too wondered if OP was referring to a 6 month old. We had youngest GD (9 months) last month overnight as parents went to a wedding some distance away and children were not invited. She was way better than I could have imagined. The only time she got upset was at bedtime when she realised Mum and Dad weren’t coming back. But she then slept all night (unlike me who slept for about an hour).
A few years ago we had GS(4) and GD(18 months) for a couple of nights (other GP’s had them too) while parents went to Hong Kong prior to spending 3 years living there. GS was fine and understood perfectly parents would be back but GD was upset and angry at the abandonment.
I’m sure all will be fine - go with the flow.

Tedber Wed 10-Jul-19 18:47:17

Sara65 and Hetty Things have certainly not changed in my household! Regular cousins sleep overs with a few friends thrown in the mix! All sleeping in bunks, on floor, head to toe! Maybe it is 'different' in smaller families?

I wouldn't have them sleeping outside though now ..as you say! But sometimes, it isn't the children who change...it is the adults! Just a point and probably going off topic smile

Evie64 Wed 10-Jul-19 18:23:31

At 6 she should be okay staying over for 1 night. Make it a big adventure with lots of treats, she'll love it.

Tedber Wed 10-Jul-19 17:59:11

My initial thought was ...do 6 year olds cry for their mums? But I suppose if she has never been left with anyone at all then she might do?

I have never had the luxury of finding out lol smile But a 6 year old should be easy to comfort with books and songs at bedtime. They should also understand mum and dad have gone out but will be back to pick them up (whenever). Plan a fun day with her and tire her out...park, soft play, zoo whatever is available and appeals to you too.

Don't worry too much and you will enjoy it.

BlueBelle Wed 10-Jul-19 16:28:21

Ahh don’t worry Ethel if she cries make her better she won’t cry all night at 6 she’s way old enough to understand they are coming back You and your house are familiar to her so she will be fine I did baby sleep overs with all mine except the two in NZ my biggest one was going for two weeks with a 15 month old while mum and dad had a belated honeymoon in Cuba That was a bit challenging as she was poorly with an ear infection and I had no car so was having to get taxis to doctors but we both survived
Don’t let it worry you too much you ll be absolutely fine

NanaSuzy Wed 10-Jul-19 16:18:24

We love having our dgd for a few nights, it is a real treat for us. She's 3 now, really enjoys her stay with us, and cries when she has to go home! I used to stay with my Grandma and similarly loved it.

Rosina Wed 10-Jul-19 16:08:20

We have our grandchildren to stay regularly - it's usually fairly tiring but delightful. They each have a drawer in the bedroom, space to hang clothes, a little throw each to personalise their beds and favourite teddies who live with us. They enjoy pottering about and doing things in the garden - a picnic goes down very well on an old bedspread - going to our shops and having a drink and a cake in the local department store, visiting some nearby relatives, feeding the ducks, the local park - it is all very simple and calm and they seem to enjoy having a relaxed time. Games in the evening, and we rarely resort to TV. I usually record a few short programmes in case they need to be amused for fifteen minutes. They get our full attention - so easy when they are going home later in the week . It doesn't need to be complicated and expensive when they are little....it's the teenagers who are usually fairly hard to please!

sarahanew Wed 10-Jul-19 15:59:56

It's pretty normal. I've had my granddaughters a few times for my daughter and her partner. It gives them quality time together to keep their relationship alive without the responsibilities of their children. They went away for a week when their eldest was six months and me n the other nanny swapped her back and forth between our work shifts!

jaylucy Wed 10-Jul-19 15:44:19

Nothing wrong with it at all. My parents had all of their grandchildren to stay - sometimes all 6 at once!
It's a special time between the two of you. Maybe you can have a chat with the other GM to see what she has planned so you don't do the same. At least a meal of their own choice is a must or take her to the movies, on a picnic or do something girly together!

DotMH1901 Wed 10-Jul-19 15:39:36

My grandson was two weeks old when I first had him to stay overnight - my daughter was shattered and needed a decent night's sleep! Since then I have had all three GC to stay within a few weeks of them being born, and regularly, they stayed over weekends with me many times (bit different now as I live with my daughter and see them all the time!) I think it will be a nice treat for your GD to stay with you and that you will both enjoy it!!

Yearoff Wed 10-Jul-19 15:22:19

Do you see DGD regularly? I’ve had all of my grandchildren overnight since they were tiny (6 weeks old in the case if my eldest). My 3rd youngest stays over 3-4 times a month (she’s 20 months) as both her parents work shifts that overlap. I love having them and mostly they are fine. They don’t cry for their parents. I’m sure she will be fine and you will enjoy the special time together.

Saggi Wed 10-Jul-19 15:20:52

Yes she’ll be good after a little cry. I’ve been having my grandkids since they’ve been 6 months old overnight and for weekends . They get used to it and learn to love it as nans are usually more relaxed than parents are. Hey get away with stuff!

stella1949 Wed 10-Jul-19 14:55:32

I've been having mine overnight since they were about 3. I find that a good routine is the best way - lots of fun during the day, a long bath with lots of toys , and then pajamas and a really long story time. My DH can read to children for hours so that's his job ! They love it. By the time he is finished they are usually asleep.

Bijou Wed 10-Jul-19 14:39:35

I am going back many years. My six year old niece came to stay. She was perfectly happy until I put her dinner in front of her. She burst into tears. It turned out she didn’t like cabbage. Now at the age of sixty she still remembers that stay and the tent I made for her Cindy doll.

Patticake123 Wed 10-Jul-19 14:37:02

Enjoy it. It’s a chance to indulge her. If she’s upset, calmly reassure her where M &D are and when they’re coming back. If need be, read her a bedtime story and then stay in the room with her until she nods off. I know this isn’t what you would have done with your own children but this is your granddaughter and you can do things differently!

granny4hugs Wed 10-Jul-19 14:06:13

I did not leave my daughters when they were young (other than for work). However my daughter and son in law left my grandson with me for two weeks and went on holiday when he was 20 months. Spent the first week potty training him which was INTERESTING - but hilarious viewing you tube vids for tips on potty training boys only to find so called 'experts' training kids who looked like they should be starting uni. Spent the second week having a total ball. Absolutely FANTASTIC. Usually I'll have him for a couple of nights on the trot when I can. Not often enough. There is a granddaughter now and i hope to have them both whenever possible. Paternal gran loves to have them to visit but not over night so no conflict.

olliebeak Wed 10-Jul-19 13:47:33

I've had all 5 of my 7 grandchildren for sleepovers since they were around 2-3wks old. Of the other two, one was born in Isle of Man and the other is my dil's child from a previous relationship. So far they've all survived and I now have great relationships with them. The most recent is now almost 3 and I currently have him on two days each week to help keep exorbitant child-care costs down - but he'll be going to full-time School-based Nursery from September. Whenever, we get the 'I want my Mummy/Daddy' or 'I love my Mummy/Daddy.' phrases, I just reply that I also love them and want them but shall we do something exciting until they come back home. I LOVE to show them photos of various members of the family when they were small ........................ the expression on the face of a 2yr old when you show him a photo of Daddy at that age, is absolutely priceless ;-)! We make sure to take a photo, or video, whenever we spend time together - then 'WhatsApp' it to Mummy/Daddy - and wait for a response back.