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Going away

(90 Posts)
etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:34:58

My dD and partner are going for a weekend without their dd. I'm having her for 1 night other gran is having her second night to be diplomatic. I know she will cry for her mum. I never left my dd. Does anyone think this is ok.

GrandmaKT Tue 09-Jul-19 11:37:36

How old is she?

etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:46:58

She is just 6.

sodapop Tue 09-Jul-19 11:52:50

You are worrying too much ethelbags1 your granddaughter will enjoy time with you if you just relax. I had all my grandchildren without parents from a much earlier age. It's good for children to have a little independence from their parents and time for you both to enjoy each other's company. Don't over think this.

Luckygirl Tue 09-Jul-19 11:54:36

Can't see the problem - just enjoy!

etheltbags1 Tue 09-Jul-19 11:55:54

I'm a compulsive worrier. They need a break . Im too old fashioned. I've planned all sorts of stuff for us to do, housework can wait it will be a fun weekend. I just hope she doesn't cry for her mum.

Fennel Tue 09-Jul-19 12:05:04

As others say, just enjoy it. I was going to say plan some activites but you've already done that.
If you think she might cry for her Mum (I don't think she will) get out some old photos of her Mum as a little girl. At 6 she's ready for a break, and a first step on the way to independence.

M0nica Tue 09-Jul-19 12:05:12

She may do if something goes wrong, but it will pass.

DGD made her first stay with us at about that age - heading for 7. We went swimming the first morning and we said we would buy her a drink in the cafe afterwards. But it was such fun in the water we stayed in the poolmuch longer than planned and the cafe had closed when we got out. There followed a major collapse and cries of 'I want to go home, I want my mummy etc. '.

However we had planned lunch out and by the time we had got to the pub, she had a soft drink and was busy studying the menu for what she wanted to eat (she loves her food), all was forgotten and everything went well for the rest of her three day stay.

So if she does get upset about anything and ask for her parents, just soldier on. It will soon stop once, something else nice is proposed.

Grannyknot Tue 09-Jul-19 12:09:53

ethelbags a six year old is a bundle of fun. I look after my 5 year old grandson sometimes for a whole day, he is very attached to his mother. When he asks for her (he doesn't cry though) I just say "She will be back sometime" and then "Let's do X or Y" and he is fine. I have been known to say "Don't ask me again!" which made him laugh.

Enjoy your time together.

wildswan16 Tue 09-Jul-19 12:51:45

It's important for children to get used to being away from mum and dad. You never know when an emergency might arise (e.g. mum's ill or in hospital).

Just don't get her over-excited and have a lovely cuddly time with her.

nanasam Tue 09-Jul-19 13:05:20

We had our GSs stay with us from a very early age (babies even), just so DD and SIL could have a break or date night. GS1 suffered with reflux and cried for the first 9 months so it was good for DD to be able to get some sleep and replenish her batteries. It also helped with our bonding with them, and they've grown up knowing they can come and stay whenever they like. They are 14 and 13 now so have their heads in their Snapchat, Instagram and other apps we have no idea about! I really loved it when they were 6 and 5, grandad would make up stories for them which they remember to this day!

Sara65 Tue 09-Jul-19 13:18:52

She’s certainly old enough for a sleepover with granny.

You haven’t said how often you see her, my local ones have stayed since babies, it’s a home from home. The ones from further away, who I obviously don’t see so often have had the odd wobble, but nothing serious, she’ll love it, and so will you!

Lessismore Tue 09-Jul-19 13:31:40

Distract her with activities, allow for some down time with favourite toys,

Kittye Tue 09-Jul-19 14:41:09

Had two of my grandsons aged 4 & 18 months for a week while their parents went on honeymoon...very tiring for us but the boys were fine. I’m sure a 6 year old will be fine,it will be an adventure for her 😁

BBbevan Tue 09-Jul-19 15:30:45

My 2DDs are now 10 and 13. We have been having them for weekends and more recently weeks since they were tiny. Admittedly they had each other, but we never had any trouble. First time DD2 stayed she sat up in bed and said "I want Mummy and Daddy". We just said she could talk to them in the morning and she went back to sleep. I think the trick is to keep them busy.Then they enjoy themselves and they forget to be sad.
Have a lovely time with your DD ethelbags. We have done cooking,make your own pizza, sewing, knitting, painting, visits to the cinema, zoo, farms, walks in the woods, cutting, sticking. Endless, 'Nanny McFee' etc, etc Just enjoy

ayse Tue 09-Jul-19 15:37:31

Ask your dd about her bedtime routine and follow the same pattern. I’ve found this helps. Also expect that she may take longer to settle than at home and just relax. Favourite toy and even her own pillow could be helpful.

I’ve looked after several of my grandchildren over the years. Lots of cuddles if necessary and have a lovely time. As others have said in other post, these times are precious.

3dognight Tue 09-Jul-19 16:01:23

Enjoy this special time.

Is she going to sleep in your bed, if you are alone in it?
Otherwise you could make her up a little bed in your room.
Mine always stayed from very young and would fall out over who would have the blow up mattress. The bed was not the favourite. She may grizzle at bed time, or during the night, but if you are nearby you can re-assure her.

You will both probably be tired in the morning, but that's life. Have a special breakfast and do something nice and she will forget her tiredness.

At least you have her first, she may be more fractious for the other granny!

You will be shattered, so make sure you have some me time when shes gone!

leyla Tue 09-Jul-19 16:05:12

You will have a great time. She's bound to miss her Mum at some point. Have some ideas ready to distract her from being upset. Enjoy!

Nannarose Tue 09-Jul-19 16:21:02

Photos of her mum as a youngster are a great idea - it makes the connection without labouring it, and can be an excuse for stories about her mum that she can look forward to sharing.
If she says she misses her mum say 'I know...' and then talk about what she will tell mummy or other nanny when she sees them. We always like to make or do something that she can show or talk to mummy about. She is a good age for some simple cooking, and could make some flapjacks or cheese straws to give her parents.

Eloethan Tue 09-Jul-19 16:34:27

I think a weekend is fine. It's good for children to get used to being away from their mum and dad for a short time - I think it makes them more able to adapt to different situations without feeling anxious.

Jane10 Tue 09-Jul-19 16:57:03

We've had our DGSs for sleepovers and longer since they were babies. It's good for them. A little 1:1 time for spoiling and fun is great. Enjoy it.

MawBroonsback Tue 09-Jul-19 17:02:00

They have left it a bit late for the first “sleepover” haven’t they?
I am sure it will be fine but wonder whether the change of granny might be more unsettling.
A few weeks ago my co- granny and I moved into D and SIL’s house for the weekend (Friday midday t Sunday late afternoon ) while Mummy and Daddy had an anniversary weekend away. Easier to do it there so that the boys could still do their football and ballet, and GD her gymnastics. I was happy to drive whoever needed driving while other granny stayed at home with the others. Apparently all 3 children could not wait for what was referred to as “Grannies in Charge” grin It worked extremely well!
My world record granny duty though was back in 2012 when Paw (already not in great health) and I looked after the 2 boys, then aged 2 1/4 and 10 months while their parents went to New York for a long weekend. That was scary! But D2 and her BF came up on the Sunday and the nanny was there on Monday . But Friday and Saturday were long......Still scary because they were so far away. Enjoy!

Fennel Tue 09-Jul-19 18:27:31

Most 6 year olds are easily distracted and can switch from miserable to cheerful very quickly.
There's the occasional stubborn exception though - who will probably turn out to be a leader in the adult world [grin}.

Fennel Tue 09-Jul-19 18:35:18

ps @ Maw - I was called on Granny duty 6 weeks after our first grandson was born in Kuwait in 2002. The Indian nanny had been called away, son and dil had to go back to work .
I was terrified, but we both survived. I think it made a bond. DiL left breast milk to feed him.
I still remember the Muslim calls to prayer 5 times a day, starting at sunrise.
He's a young man of 17 now.

MawBroonsback Tue 09-Jul-19 18:39:20

Fennel 6 weeks is indeed early. My first “duty” was when DGS was 4 months old and SIL wanted to take D away overnight for a spa weekend .
I think it is safe to say I did not sleep a wink that night!