Tolerant or Intolerant?

Be respectful; play the ball, not the man. I cannot improve on what Elegran and Urmstongran have said.

BradfordLass72

Just read your post about broken legs and minds, I suppose we can all see someone has a broken leg, but cannot see into their broken mind.

The internet has encouraged this " Dutch Courage " that many have as I'm sure that some of what is said would never be said on a face to face situation. It's a coward's paradise !

I think one half of the country are at the other's throats at the moment and that is reflected in social media. Plus its now become apparent that political and other public figures regularly receive death threats. People now feel entitled to be rude to whoever they like and that their opinion is as good as anyone else's.

I am amazed by some of the spats that go on on GN and despite vigorous denials, there are cliques and people who only respond to certain others. The latter means many posters, however reasonable, go unheard. Recently a poster asked someone to confirm that her/his post had been read as she was never responded to. I don't think anyone replied!!

So I'm with those who view the OP as a misguided attempt to separate out the nice from the not nice - othering -, people feel strongly and some can't resist being rude. Aren't all posters just a selection of people like any other set? There are a lot of US posters and other nationalities too, it's just people, sane or insane, who's to make the distinction?! . Oh and personally, I think many people don't actually bother to read the posts carefully.

P. S. I noticed that you asked on a thread the other day, *Bradford Lass*if there was a safety net for older women without pensions. Answer, not really, only a jump-through-hoops-really-youre-workshy one.

Cliques and groups frequently operate in the same fashion: They do what they do under the guise of "the greater good" all while proselytizing - Any comments that don't fall into step are deemed disruptive or rude wrong by the collective-

Once established that the comments are disruptive or rude, they're diagnosed- The label is then applied, be it Them, Other, Bi-polar, Sad, Not One of Us- perfect people

I think that there is already some intolerance being shown on this thread, which is sad. The OP made a legitimate point. If things start getting too heated I withdraw from the thread. I don’t particularly want to argue with posters who think their view is the only one allowed or the only one that’s correct.

I think the issue is whether your view of intolerance is the only view of intolerance. I doubt that it ever is.

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Groupthink

I think it is more to do with cultural divide Rose. Groupthink only reinforces opinions. I think what upsets people is that they see good manners, politeness, thoughtfulness, call it what you will, differently. We are a divided country and always have been but we now come into more contact than we once did.

Also, for some, the things that gave them high status within their own cultural group no longer exists so they are fighting to find both a place and blame.

Considering the state of the country just now, with the extreme polarisation of politics and public opinion I find posters on the political threads on GN fairly restrained.

On the odd occasion I have ventured onto Murmsnet I have found it much more cut and thrust.

I think there is a lot of kindness and support to be found on here, but there is bound to be argument and intolerance at times, especially when not interacting face to face, it's how us humans behave.

I think it would be very dull to have extremely polite, but bland forums.

Totally polite would indeed be very bland, ("After you, Claude" - "No, after you, Cecil!" ) However, on some occasions a little more politeness would be an improvement, or rather a little less savaging of other posters would be an improvement.

Oh, I don't know. What about "icy" politeness? That's hardly bland. It can be very cutting and very funny.

We definitely need more humour that's for sure.

Of course it is possible to be polite and unpleasant at the same time?

You are still assuming Elegran that I would be bound to find your idea of politeness the same as my idea of politeness. Manners or politeness are just rules that are always changing. It would be far more useful if people were to practice tolerance. If you find someone rude your best bet would be to assume they may be finding you lacking in their everyday good manners too. I think great allowance is made for people on this forum who don't even realise how rude others find them.

For my "politeness" you could read "showing tolerance" then, GG3.

Lazigirl A sense of humour can save us from a lot of inter-personal problems.

I don't believe the are interchangeable in any culture Elegran. Politness/manners in one group may be very different to those in another; they are just rules. Tolerance requires the same from everyone.
Engage brain and realise what has happened and then make a personal decision.

I think it is the assumption they are the same that adds to the upsets. If you think about it, cultures beset by strict rules of behaviour are often the least tolerant. I think the same can apply to people too.

I would just stick the leaves on a bit of paper and sprinkle them with glitter. Years since my littleies were at nursery school.

I may be a bit late with that post.

Oh God. I am beginning to sound like the ditty old woman inhabiting Gransnet threads. ??

Soz.

Not ditty! And certainly not dirty!

Dotty

Sort of like family dynamics- What works for one family doesn't for another- But it doesn't end with that- There's judgement, which leads to us/them type thinking- Hatfield & McCoy-

en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Hatfield–McCoy_feud

Isn't glitter outlawed?