Our GS is 3 tomorrow. I feel unbearably sad that our son seems to be holding back on how this day is to be celebrated. And we are not part of it.
We believe we are loved and loving grandparents. We have our GS and GD (15m) two days a week; collecting and delivering. We cover all the costs of car seats, cots, toys etc etc. Until I had grandchildren I did not know I would fall in love again.
There have been some terrible ruptures between ourselves and our son and wife over their expectations of childcare. At present we are all treading very carefully.
We asked what presents to buy and what the plans for the birthday were. They couldn't think of any presents and were going away for the birthday weekend.
We meet our son for lunch - he has no time to see us at the weekends. At lunch I raised the away weekend coming up and learnt he had got the dates wrong and they had been away already. I described what we had bought to give his son on Monday. A brief pause and no more was said.
I know the intensity of my feelings are out of proportion to not knowing. However I wonder how many grandparents actively involved in the care of their grandchildren would know nothing of the parent's plans. I'm disappointed our son can't say you are not included. We have been included in previous birthdays.
